Paperkites
by YouSaid
Summary: Evelyn Asteri gave Peter Pan her love. And now he's come back to claim all of her. Lost girls and lost boys are at war across realms where love and hatred collide time and time again in an endless battle of hideaways and secrecy where only one side will remain Panfiction! Pan/OC. Slight Hook/OC, but Lieutenant Duckling cause CS is endgame. M for smut and violence. Read and Review!
1. Candlelight

**Candlelight**

Evelyn held onto the two little girls with tight hands – so tight that she was sure they were going to bleed – but she wouldn't let go for anything. The cold night was nothing in comparison to the cold fear that was piercing her heart over and over again with each step that the three of them took towards Evelyn's hideaway.

Fumbling with her keys, she heard the approaching footstep even closer and hurriedly sped up her movements, clicking the door open and pushing the girls desperately into the room. But just as she went to shut the door, she saw a glint of silver jammed in the crevice between the doorframe and door and gave a huge sigh of relief, pulling the door open once more.

"Holy shit, Killian!" Evelyn's hand was on her chest, trying to still her rapidly beating heart. "I thought you were Pan!"

"That demon's still after you?" he replied gruffly, entering the room and shutting the door quickly before helping Evelyn light the candles. "I thought that ended years ago…Hello!" The pirate appeared to have just noticed the two young girls who were shivering in the cold. "My name's Killian."

Neither of them said anything, but both turned their wide brown eyes up to meet with Evelyn's.

"It's alright," she said comfortingly as Hook knelt down to their height. "This is my best friend, Killian. He's going to help me take care of you, okay?"

"Ah, but surely two lovely ladies such as yourselves are far too beautiful to have me as your protector." The two little girls giggled at Killian's endearments and he couldn't help but smile. Helping Evelyn out was no trouble for him, at any time. Her girls were just as much his – this small underground safehouse, well, it was family now.

"Alright Tara, Kala, let's get you into some warmer clothes. And you can meet some of the other girls."

"Don't worry," Killian said with a smile, as he followed behind Evelyn with a torch to light the way. "Once you meet Sarah you'll be dressed in gowns fit for princesses."

And Evie smiled at his words.

xxx

**_Two Years Ago_**

_The warm glow of candlelight shone about the room as Evie lay down upon the bed. Pan's tree house was filled with warmth ignited by the blazing heat in his gaze and the rapid thumping of Evie's anxious heart. But it wasn't in fear, no, never in fear. This was anticipation. For tonight, this night she knew, was her last in Neverland._

_With her shoes kicked to the floor and her hair coming apart from her braid, Pan watched her, walking across the room with a predatory glint in his green eyes. _

_"We…" Evie trailed off. "We're really doing this?"_

_"Tomorrow will be too late, Evie," Pan answered as he crawled onto the mattress with her. "Tomorrow, you'll be married off. And you'll be an adult."_

_"So you intend to ruin me before my husband gets to."_

_"Yes," Pan answered huskily, crawling towards her like she was his prey. "I fully intend to ruin you. I'm going to touch you until you burn for no one but me. Your body will know how desperate you were to have me and how good you'll feel with me buried inside you that you will never desire another. I'm going to mark you. I'm going to ruin you."_

_He glanced at her with piercing green eyes before smirking, "Consider it my parting gift."_

_"You're doing this…so that I'll only want you?"_

_"Oh no." Pan was on her now, sitting between her open legs and reaching for her neck. His breath was warm on her face as his fingers traced her soft skin. "We're doing this, because I want you to know, in your very being, in your very soul – that you love only me."_

_But there was nothing said of Pan's feelings as he pressed his lips firmly to Evie's, feeing her arch into him wantonly. It had been years that Pan had toyed with her, surmounting in this night. This one night where all foreplay would end, and he would finally sate his hunger. So as he pulled her white shift up her legs and over her head, she looked at him with a fire in her eyes, the heat of their bodies fusing into electricity. Pan traced his fingers over her bare skin, brushing over her nipples, her stomach, and finally lower to where her core was throbbing for him._

_"No," Evie murmured, trying to pull his hand away from her centre, moaning breathily, "We've done that before. I want more."_

_"My, my Evelyn," he smirked, kissing along her bare stomach. "You're very eager to have me take you, aren't you?"_

_His words and touches had her moaning, and her body was moving desperately against his, hips crushing upwards while hands sought to remove him of his clothing. All hints of laughter gone from his face, Pan looked down at her with desire._

_"Please Pan," she murmured, grasping at his arms as he leaned down to kiss her passionately, his teeth tugging at her lips as he pushed himself into her slowly, feeling her tense underneath him. He brushed her brown curls from her face that was clenched in pain but couldn't help but think that she was beautiful. "More," she finally hissed._

_Pan pulled himself out of Evie before pushing back in again, this time with more force, building up a rhythm until her moans were no longer of pain, but pleasure, however similar the two were to the young man. Gripping her hip, tightly, he used it as leverage to push harshly into her, eagerly seeking out his own release._

_"Tell me that you love me, Evie," Pan ordered huskily as he felt his orgasm approaching, gripping her tightly as he bit down on the flesh of her shoulder, her yelp spurring him onwards. "Tell me."_

_"I love you," she breathed as she felt herself coming apart beneath him, dragging him along with her as he let out a guttural groan, finally collapsing atop him._

_"You bastard," she finished finally, realising what he'd made her do. She pushed him off her body, staring up at the ceiling in horror. Her heart was calming down, only for her to be filled with an emptiness that she couldn't explain. Or at least, an emptiness that she didn't want to explain._

_Turning aside from Pan, she grabbed at her dress as the dread filled her. Sitting on the edge, she felt him coming over to her, pressing cold kisses against her neck as he pushed her hair aside. "Thank you for that, Evie."_

_"Your heart feeling okay, Pan?" Evie asked, her voice inconceivably weak. "Now that you've taken away my love."_

_"Ah, but you gave it willingly, my dear," he answered, whispering upon her ear. "You _gave_ me your love. _

___"_And now you'll always be mine."

xxx

When Evie woke up, gasping in sharp breaths as her body tensed in both pleasure and a kind of painful fear, she glanced out of her window. There, she searched for any hint, a sign, that maybe what she'd just dreamed didn't mean what she knew that it did. She hoped beyond hope that if she looked across the road, she wouldn't see a light on in the innkeeper's room.

But a crackling fire was casting a glow out of the window.

And she started to hyperventilate. Because if she'd dreamt about him; if there was someone in that room…

She clutched her sheet to her body, suddenly freezing cold.

He was back.

* * *

**A/N: DUNDUNDAHHHHHHH!**

**Welcome my lovelies to my newest Panfiction.**

**And yes. It is definitely Panfiction (just so you don't all get tricked into reading a Hook/OC like last time). This is going to be heaps of fun to write after going into all that CaptainSwan (which, you know, I seem to be incapable of not writing. So fair warning, there will be mentions.)**

**Of course, AU. Because, isn't everything concerning Pan AU nowadays? =P**

**But yeah, leave me a line, tell me what you think, and share the love around, because I love you for reading!**

**Much love!**

**YouSaid**


	2. Happy Birthday

A/N: Hey Team!

Thank you so much for that response to the first chapter. I love coming back to writing PanFiction and getting an epic response, it's so encouraging!

_Ari: Did Pan ever love her? Well, we'll have to wait and see. ;)_

Here's the next chapter for you guys! I think it may be the first and only time I write something completely set in the past. But anyways. Love you!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Happy Birthday**

xxx

**_Four Years Ago_**

_"Emma!"_

_"Oh shit," Emma said before clapping her hand over her mouth and seeing Evelyn's wide smile. The two of them giggled quietly at her outburst, trying to avoid the earshot of her mother. Which seemed impossible._

_"Emma! There you are and…oh. Evelyn."_

_"Good evening, Your Majesty," Evelyn said, giving a curtsy with her muddied brown skirt. Emma was just as dirty and the Queen was giving them both disapproving looks._

_"Emma, you were supposed to be in your writing lesson twenty minutes ago."_

_"I'm sorry, mother," Emma said, bowing her head, but a smirk played at the corner of her mouth as she glanced at Evelyn out of the corner of her eye._

_"Never mind," her mother sighed, taking her by the shoulder and nudging her forward. "Off you go to get cleaned up before dinner."_

_Emma nodded before throwing an apologetic glance at Evie who nodded in understanding. Evie never got off easy whenever the Queen caught her._

_"Evelyn," she began softly. "I've told you about this before."_

_"I'm sorry , Your Highness."_

_"No," Snow White said, "You don't have to. You never have to call me that, Evelyn. Please."_

_"But I don't feel comfortable calling you anything else."_

_"How about Snow?" the Queen said warmly. "It is, after all my name."_

_"But you're the Queen –"_

_"And you're a Princess, Evie," Snow countered. "And I know you don't care for it, but please, don't try and sway Emma from her duties. She will rule someday and she needs to learn."_

_"And I won't so I don't need to." There was a bitterness in Evie's tone that Snow heard beneath distant words._

_"I never said that," Snow answered, reaching out to touch her gently on the shoulder. "But you and I both know that it's always going to be up to you, what you want to do."_

_"Because I have to decide now, right?" Evie answered, looking up at the Queen defiantly. "I'm almost fourteen Your Highness. I'm a Princess with no kingdom, so I'm not even a Princess anymore. So what would be the point in learning the rules of diplomacy? Of becoming such an accomplished woman? When really, I'm no more important than every person beyond those gates."_

_Snow knew that when Evie was like this, there was no arguing with her._

_"You're too much like your mother, Evie."_

_"And my mother is dead, Your Majesty," Evie said harshly, "So knowing all those things, and being who she was, didn't really get her anywhere except the bottom of the sea."_

_"Evelyn!"_

_"I'm going to my room, Your Highness," Evie said, beginning to walk past the Queen. "Please don't call me for dinner."_

_And when it was just Snow in the garden, she gave a loud sigh, "Teenagers."_

xxx

_Evie had lived with a quiet rage inside her for a very long time. She wasn't one for confrontations and she hated being so harsh with Snow when the woman had been nothing but motherly towards her, but sometimes it boiled to the surface and she would get angry at various things._

_The young princess wasn't watching where she was going as she headed through the castle towards her bedroom. So it was of no surprise to her that she ran into someone. And that someone just happened to be the one person she needed._

_"Killian!" Evie wrapped her arms around his waist without a second thought. "I have never needed to see you more than I do now."_

_"Whoa, Princess," he said, pulling away from her and pushing a rogue curl from her face, "What's wrong?"_

_"Snow's trying to get me to take classes again," she sighed._

_"You know, it could be good for you," Killian suggested as they started walking side by side towards her room. _

_"It could be good for you too, Killian," Evie groaned in annoyance, looking up at him. "But you don't see her all up in your face trying to make you a princess."_

_"I feel as though that requires certain body parts that I lack, Evie," Killian teased. "Not to mention a status that eludes me."_

_"You're no better than I am," Evie said, with her hand on the door. As she was about to enter her room, she looked back at Killian curiously, "What were you doing up here anyway? I mean, you don't come up the end of the castle that often. Not that I'm complaining about you being here or anything."_

_Killian merely gave a deep chuckle as he looked past her, pushing open her door to where she found her room newly decorated._

_"I know it isn't your birthday until tomorrow, but since they're having the tournament…" Killian shrugged, a little embarrassed by the lengths he'd gone to for Evie's birthday. "I'm not going to get the chance to do this so I thought, why not?"_

_Evie smiled widely as she went to her desk, where he'd placed a large bouquet of every flower you could possibly find in the palace gardens. It was huge! __And next to it sat a small pouch. With an excited grin, Evie set her nimble fingers to work untying the strings. The minute she pulled the gift from within, she let out a gasp. The silver chain glittered in the afternoon sun shining in through the window._

_"It's beautiful," Evie breathed, unable to take her eyes away from the perfectly sculpted Northern Star hanging on the end of the chain. "Thank you, Killian! But…I mean…this would have cost a lot."_

_Killian shrugged indifferently, "It was worth it."_

_And Evie blushed, holding out the necklace, silently asking for him to clasp it around her neck. Pulling aside her brown curls, Evie exposed her neck to him, and after clasping it there, he moved away, staring at her curiously. The sun was shining upon her, casting an unearthly glow and he felt a pang of longing searching through him._

_"Killian," Evie said, spinning around and looking at him tenderly. "It's my birthday tomorrow."_

_"Yes it is, Princess," he said with a smile, "That's what the gifts were for."_

_"Can I ask you something?"_

_"Ask away."_

_"You've kissed someone, right?"_

_Killian's brow furrowed at the personal question. It seemed strange coming from her mouth, from the lips of a Princess…and then he looked away quickly when he realised he was thinking about her lips._

_"Erm. Yeah," he said reluctantly and almost a little sheepishly as he sank down onto the side of her bed._

_"Would you kiss me?" she asked experimentally. Every birthday brought that dreaded day, when she would be given as a wife to some foreign kingdom, closer. And if she were to be kissed, she wanted it to be with someone she'd loved, someone who'd been her best friend since the moment she arrived a year ago, broken and grieving at the loss of her parents and the loss of their kingdom. _

_"Evie…"_

_"If I wasn't a Princess," she said, crossing the room to sit beside him, the folds of her pale green skirt flying with her, the dirt and mud lining the edges the very opposite of what she was. "If I wasn't a Princess, would you consider it?"_

_"You _are _a princess and I'm considering it," he answered with a casual smirk, a small blush flooding Evie's face once more. He was leaning forward then…_

_"Killian Jones!"_

_"Sir Pellinore," he grimaced hearing the sound of his master calling out from the stables below Evie's window, pulling away from where Evie was trembling, waiting for his kiss. "Squire duties call, my lady."_

_Evie slumped back in disappointment. But as Killian got up, he grasped onto her hand, placing a feather light kiss on her hand._

_"Be prepared to sneak out tonight, Evie," he whispered, before giving her a wink. "Stables at nine."_

_And her left her there, excited for her birthday eve. She was going out._

xxx

_Killian already had her horse saddled when Evie met him in the stables that night. She looked far from a princess that night, wearing pants and a loose shirt, boots with her hair free flowing and wild._

_"Well well, Princess," he said as he brought out her horse, "You certainly know how to dress down."_

_"I'll take that as a compliment Master Jones," she said with a smile. He moved to give her a step up to her horse, but using the stall gate she managed to swing her leg over the saddle and into the stirrup in one smooth movement. Killian watched her, impressed._

_"You don't act like a Princess, Evie."_

_"And you don't act like a squire, Killian," she mocked a disappointed face, "Shame on you for corrupting the innocent."_

_"Oh, there's going to be a lot of corrupting tonight, Princess," he laughed. "Ever been to a tavern?"_

_"I'm fourteen!"_

_"Live a little," he smirked. "Now come on, we need to get out of the gates before they shut them."_

_Ten minutes later they were laughing in exhilaration, leading their horses by the reins through the town's cobblestones streets. _

_"I can't believe Garrow's still making fun of that one time I snuck out and got drunk when I was fifteen. Every time I leave the palace at night now, he brings it up."_

_Evie chuckled as she tied her horse's reins to the trough around the side of the tavern. With the two animals side by side, her and Killian made their way into the tavern single file, taking a seat at one of the tables in the corner after weaving their way through the various other occupants._

_"What can I do for you, gents?"_

_"Bottle of rum thanks, love," Killian said, giving the barmaid a dashing smile that almost made her swoon._

_"I'll be right back," she promised._

_"Word of warning," Killian said, eyeing Evie suggestively, "Most taverns double as brothels. So, keep to what you're wearing right now and we shouldn't have any problems."_

_"So women don't even come in here?"_

_"Not really," Killian thought for a moment, "Unless they're looking for a job."_

_"That's so discriminatory," Evie frowned, sinking backwards with her arms folded. _

_"Way of the world, Evie. After all, princess…squire…"_

_"We manage to break that social rule on a regular basis," Evie pointed out._

_"Yes, Princess," he answered as the barmaid came back with some cups and a bottle for them. She took her time laying them out, but Killian spoke to Evie until she walked away._

_"Aww, Killian," Evie pouted, "You made her sad!"_

_"I'm sure that it will pass in time," he answered, looking back to her, "And despite the rumours that circulate around the castle, I don't have a different woman in my bed every night."_

_"Oh?" Evie raised her eyebrow mockingly._

_"I've never had a woman in my bed."_

_"Oh!" This time it was in surprise. She supposed, palace gossip had kind of been accepted as truth. It was well known that eighteen year old Killian Jones was a flirt, and a good one at that, but he was Evie's friend first and foremost. Of course his word took precedence._

_"Anyway," he continued, pouring their drinks and sliding on over to her. "Happy Birthday, Evelyn Asteri."_

_Evie raised her cup to her lips, tasting the unfamiliarity of the drink burning down her throat. Attributing the displeasing taste to nothing more than being unused to such drinks. By the time she'd finished the entire cup, she was used to it – or numbed to it – it was impossible to tell. But by the time she'd downed the second she was pleasantly buzzed. Low tolerance first timer and all._

_"I'll be right back," Killian said, "Nature calls."_

_Evie rolled her eyes as he slid off the table. Looking around the room, she caught sight of someone standing beside the doorway outside. He'd only be visible from her angle, and she didn't know what it was that made her stand up and cross the room, meeting him in the wide doorway._

_"And who are you then?" Talking to strangers whilst drunk? Really smooth, Evie._

_The young man tilted his head to glance at her, green eyes gazing through the darkness at the way she leaned against the doorframe, a little tired as it neared midnight._

_"I have a feeling I'm the one you've been waiting for," he said smoothly, recognising in her, the displaced nature that filled him and those he knew. He saw a lost girl. _

_"Is that the line you give all the girls?"_

_The young man turned fully then, and Evie realised he was younger than she'd first thought. There was an arrogant edge to his stance but a boyish hint to his smirk. "Actually, I don't talk to many girls."_

_"Figures," Evie said. "I'm Evie."_

_"Peter," he answered, taking a step back from her and looking up at the stars. "This sky is a little too dark for my liking."_

_"How much have you been drinking?" Evie frowned, but he merely laughed, beckoning her over. "Look up," he said, once she was there beside him. Stars dotted the sky. "There aren't nearly enough."_

_"Where have you seen more?" _

_"My home," he said, looking down at her with sparkling eyes, "Neverland."_

_"Neverland?!" Evie asked incredulously. "What are you on about? Neverland's a myth."_

_"Really?" Peter cocked an eyebrow at her before pulling her arm up and pointing up to the sky. "Second star to the right and straight on 'til morning."_

_"That's insane Peter…"_

_"Is it though, Evie?" He was looking at her challengingly – daring her to take his words for truth. A distant bell rang, striking midnight and, lost in his gaze, she barely managed to mutter, "It's midnight."_

_"Yes it is," Peter answered softly._

_"That makes it my birthday," she continued at a murmur._

_"And what do you want?"_

_"A kiss."_

_And maybe it was because she had the unusual hum of alcohol running through her veins, but Evie was given the bravery to kiss the handsome boy, arching her face up as he brought his lips down to meet hers softly. It was tender and soft and promising. And by the time the clock gave it's twelfth toll, Peter had broken away, Evie's lips left tingling._

_"Come away with me," the whisper came as a breath on her lips. "You don't belong here."_

_"A princess without a throne," she murmured to herself, glancing at the ground, digging her booted toe into the dirt that covered the cobblestones. "When will I be back?"_

_"You'll wake up in your own bed tomorrow. If you want."_

_And Killian, her title and the weak ties she felt to this realm fled her, as Peter wrapped his arms around her waist and pressed a finger upon the star around her neck. In a blinding flash of white, they had disappeared._

_And aside from the light breeze that swept through the street when they left, there was no evidence that Evie and Pan had even been there that night._

_Happy Birthday Evie…_


	3. Amongst the Stars

A/N: Hey Team!

I'm really excited. Cause, if you were there for _When One Day_ and _A Soldier's Curse,_ you'd know that I was having a fair bit of trouble getting a job. And *drum roll* I now have one!

I do have to go back to my high school for it, but being a teacher now, it makes it more bearable. So I'm going to be teaching piano whilst going to Uni this year. I get to go and buy music books and stickers and a cool diary and be all profesh. #notevenanadultyet

But anyway. Here's another chapter, dear Neverlanders.

_Aureaborealis and ElektraMackenzie: Just wanna say, I love how you aren't logged in but you still review. It really means a lot that you guys leave me something to read. Heart you! xx_

Aight. Enjoy!

* * *

**Amongst the Stars**

Evie woke up freezing cold the morning after realising that Peter Pan was back. Her window was open and letting in the wind from the horrible day. The sky was a darkened grey and the trees that lined the coast were swaying in a harsh wind that threatened an oncoming storm.

Evelyn only had that brief moment of respite before a high pitched "MOMMY!" came rampant through her room. At her door were three little girls. The two that had called to her came rushing forward to jump on her the moment she was awake, but at a second glance, Evie saw that the one in the doorway was one of the new girls from last night.

Xenia and Lily jumped on her body, trying to pull away her covers and Evie had to laugh at their reckless abandon.

"I'm getting up, I'm getting!" she said, struggling to push the two girls off of her body. They ended up laughing on their backs as Evie rolled her eyes, smiling at Kala who was standing with a shy smile in the doorway.

"Morning honey," Evie said with a smile, "Come in! Do you want to help me pick out my dress?"

Kala nodded without saying a word, stepping into the room and following Evie to the small chest at the end of her bed. Over the years, she'd built up a collection. As the girls grew older, the amount had lessened, but Evie gave them away willingly. Everything in this stronghold didn't belong to one person. It belonged to all of them.

"What colour do you reckon, Kala?"

"Blue," she whispered almost silently. But Evie smiled as she pulled the blue dress out. It was the first word Kala had said. It was a start.

Breakfast was in full swing by the time Evie came down the stairs. Kala was clutching her hand whilst Lily and Xenia were as boisterous as ever, telling Evie and Kala their plans to decorate Tara and Kala's room.

The underground stronghold was pretty massive. When Evie had founded it, it hadn't been nearly as big. Just a one room cottage. But then she'd dug underground. And with each new girl that came along, their underground city grew. As time went on, Evie had even bought out some of the surrounding houses so that they had a fortress of sorts. But the dining hall was underground, and because of the amount of people there, it was surprisingly warm.

"Why is there a baby here?"

"She's a little lost girl too, isn't she?" Evie answered Tara with a smile as she sat down beside her on the long table. The young girl thought for a moment before shrugging in agreement. She was a lot more talkative than Kala, but she was also a few years older. They hadn't got around to talking about it yet, but it seemed like Tara had most of the physical scars, Kala's seemed to have marred her inwardly.

Killian took a moment then to come and sit next to Evie at the breakfast table. With the little girl clinging to his neck, he found it hard to disentangle himself from her without snagging his hook on anything. Eventually though, he managed.

"Thank you for taking her last night," Evie said as she took the 13 month old into her arms. She was waking from sleep which was good. It had been a horrible few weeks of trying to get her to sleep properly since she was teething. Getting back to a normal routine was essential.

"You'd been up for 24 hours trying to get Tara and Kala away from that woman. You needed your beauty sleep."

"You saying I'm ugly, Jones?" she teased.

"Not at all, my lady," he grinned, niggling under the baby's chin. Her eyes found Killian and she gave him a smile.

"Why does she always smile at you?" Evie asked, disgruntled as she turned the child to look at her. "You never smile at me, Ash."

And true enough, the baby's face became serious once more. Sighing, Evie placed her lightly in her lap before reaching for a bowl of porridge. Whilst Ash's hands went to play with the food, Evie attempted to get at least some of it into her mouth. It proved impossible though, and she looked over at Killian pleadingly. He rolled his eyes before giving Ash a wide smile and holding his hand and hook out for her. She climbed off Evie's lap and into his arms easily. Killian gave her a smug smile.

"Not a word, Hook," Evie said warningly, reaching for her food. "Not. A. Word."

xxx

**Four Years Ago**

_Evie barely had a chance to blink before the street had disappeared and she was standing atop a cliff surrounded by foreign plants, rocks and air. She would have lost her balance were it not for Pan's arms around her waist, which, once he saw she was stable, he removed._

_"Welcome to Neverland, Evie," Peter Pan said with a wide grin, using his hands to display the world to her. "A few quick rules. One, don't go into the Dark Forest without me, Two, Echo caves are out of bounds, and Three, if it seems impossible, it isn't, but that doesn't mean you have to try. As far as I know, in your world, curiosity killed the cat."_

_"But I'm not a cat."_

_"Ooh," Pan smirked, "I picked a witty one this time. You're going to be fun."_

_"Fun, eh?" Evie cocked an eyebrow. "What _do_ you do for fun around here? I mean, it's late at night and it seems pretty dead."_

_"Fun?" Pan answered. "Well that only takes a few notes. But before we do that…"_

_Within a few seconds, Evie was swept up into Pan's arms despite her yelp of protest and he had taken a giant leap off the cliff. Evie wasn't scared of heights, but she was scared of magic. And having a teenage boy flying through the air in a world that she didn't know had magic written all over it. _

_"Peter…"_

_"Pan," he corrected._

_"What are you?"_

_"I'm a boy!" he laughed. Evie's face screwed up in frustration. _

_"Then how are we flying?"_

_"Would you prefer to not be?" He didn't wait for her to answer, merely dropping her from his arms within a split second. The scream of fear that ripped through her, in those two seconds she spent falling, echoed around Neverland's night. This was it. She'd followed a boy she didn't even know to a land so far from home and she was going to die – _

_She was back in his arms again. And he was looking at her with a smug grin that she had the sudden desire to slap right off his face. Her heart was beating a million miles a minute as he carried her through the air. And despite her anger, there was a thrill that ran the length of her body, and the only thing she could attribute it to was the adrenalin._

_Of course, she knew now that Pan hadn't meant to let her fall to her death, always intending to catch her, but she hadn't known that. And the fear had given her a rush that she wanted to feel again._

_"Can you…"_

_She didn't even need to finish her sentence before Pan dropped her again. This time, she didn't scream – she laughed – her body soaring through the air as though she was cutting it with her dive._

_And she was almost at the treetops by the time Pan swooped in to pick her up again, nodding appreciatively. Her laughter seemed infectious, because the minute he stepped down in the camp, letting Evie down lightly on her feet, he was chuckling too._

_It was a long time since Peter Pan had last laughed._

_"So this is where you live?" Evie asked, spinning around, a little breathless._

_"It is," he answered, pulling his flue out from his pocket. "Me and the lost boys."_

_"The lost boys…"_

_A short tune escaped Pan's lips through the pipes as he called them forth from sleep. It was dissonant and eerie, but something held true about it. Pan smiled at her through his playing when he saw that she could hear it. It merely confirmed what he already knew. Little lost girl._

_She would be his._

_Wasn't she already? Within five minutes, hadn't she asked him for a kiss? It was spur of the moment, but something within her had to have wanted him. Wanted to know…_

_He stopped playing the music then as surprise hit him. He was her first kiss._

_It should have been obvious to him, with the hesitancy in which she had placed his lips upon his. The soft movements; the innocence._

_And as the lost boys fled their tree houses and lined up before him, Peter tried to push the thought away, returning to the promise of fun that he had given Evie._

_"Alright boys," Pan called out. "The day break is mere hours away, and when it rises our guest will be gone. So take yourselves to the stars and in them you'll run far, over and under until you reach the ocean floor. Only then will you find what treasure lies in store."_

_"A puzzle?" Evie asked curiously, looking up at Peter as he finished giving the riddle._

_"A game," Pan answered, his green eyes gleaming. He took Evie by the hand and ran after the lost boys, who had all spread out through the night in search of what Evie had gathered was treasure._

_"You said…'take yourselves to the stars'."_

_"It's not literal, Evie," Pan said, stopping in his tracks. "Although, I guess in a way it is." He turned back to her quickly and slowly before breaching the distance between them with a single step. Tracing his hand along her cheek, he heard her breath hitch and smirked as she closed her eyes. His hand ran down her neck towards where the small star charm sat on her chest. But he didn't touch it. He didn't want her gone just yet. _

_So he pressed his lips gently to hers in a quick kiss and she smiled when he pulled away before he took her hand once more._

_"C'mon, Evie," he said, pulling her along lightly. "Let's go find the stars."_


	4. Flattering

A/N: Ergh. I'm so terrible. I start writing, and then I get distracted by reading other fanfics.

Like, I legitly read a Dramione fic for the first time in three years. Rest assured, it reinstated my faith in the ship after leaving it because I was reading too many terrible fanfictions. I'm back on the boat.

_Guest: Thanks so much for your support! Here's the next update! xx_

Enjoy, my lovelies! xx

* * *

**Flattering**

Evie and Sarah were examining Xenia and Lily's work as they made beds and hung up curtains around the room. Tara and Kala were lighting candles as they walked around the room, making the room a little more homely for them. It was nice to think that they both, finally, had a home.

"Thank you, Evie," Tara said, hesitant, before throwing her arms around Evie. The girl who looked about ten, held onto her tightly. And Evie wrapped her arms around her shoulders in return, a smile upon her face. "Thank you for taking us away from her."

"You'll always be safe here," Evie promised, as Kala glanced at her sister and Evie locked in an embrace. Kala walked over slowly and Evie offered an arm to her. That seemed to be all the encouragement she needed because the next second, her arms were wrapped around her and they were hugging.

"The other girls call you 'mom'."

Evie was surprised as Kala spoke from the folds of her skirt. Leaning down to face the two sisters she said gently, "Yes they do. But you don't have to if you don't want to."

Kala was looking at her wide eyed even though Tara was still wary. Kala wanted to trust Evie more than anything but Tara wasn't so sure.

"I want to," Kala said softly, "I want to stay here."

"And you Tara?"

"I want to." But she was still hesitant.

"Then this is your home now," Evie confirmed with a wide grin. "And don't be afraid to come to me for _anything_ that might be wrong. Okay?"

"Okay," Tara nodded with a small smile growing at the corner of her lips. Maybe, they would be okay here. Maybe they could be safe.

"Okay," Kala repeated after her older sister, but adding on the end, "Mom."

xxx

**Four Years Ago**

_When Evie awoke the next morning, it was to persistent knocking upon her door, quickly followed by the warning, "Evelyn Rose Asteri. If you do not open this door I will call my mother and have the guards cut it down."_

_"I'm coming, Emma," Evie groaned, throwing off her quilt and realising that she was still in her clothes from the night before. And they were slightly more dirty than when she had put them on._

_Of course, rolling down that hillside hadn't assisted with her cleanliness._

_Evie smiled when she realised that it wasn't just a dream. That her and Pan _had_ actually rolled down that hillside in reckless abandon, their search for Neverland's treasure almost the furthest thing from her mind. It didn't particularly matter. Because when the sun began to rise, Pan had given her a soft goodbye kiss and sent her away with a single touch to her necklace._

_Evie looked down at the charm around her neck then with a vacant curiosity. It was Killian who had given it to her…did he know?_

_"EVIE!"_

_"I'm here, I'm here!" She ran towards the door as fast as she could, hoping that Emma wouldn't notice the clothing she was wearing. But with that girl's perceptibility, it was inevitable that Evie would be spilling her guts within ten minutes._

_"Finally," Emma sighed dramatically, walking past Evie and into the room where she collapsed onto her bed. "The tournament starts in an hour and Snow wants you to eat before we have to go and sit for an entire day in hard backed wooden thrones._

_"Uh uh," Evie crooked her finger with a smile playing at her lips. "You get the wooden throne. I get cushions and a shielded view of your posterior." _

_"I hate you," Emma glared at her friend._

_"And I hate you too," Evie said with a nod. "Righteo. What am I wearing then?"_

_"Something flattering. Fortunately at this tournament, we get young knights."_

_"I will remind you again, I sit in the back."_

_"And I will remind you, dear Evie, that they don't go for the plain ones, they go for the exotic ones." Emma made a point of outlining Evie's curves with her hands from a distance whilst Evie stared back at her incredulously. Emma, with her golden blonde curls and emerald eyes was far from plain. "And this tournament _is_ partially your birthday present."_

_"Yes!" Evie said mockingly. "Just what I've always wanted! Men shoving sticks into each other until someone gets trampled by their own horse."_

_"You're so cynical, Evie," Emma rolled her eyes. "Prince Phillip's going to be there. And I know how much you used to make eyes at him."_

_"Yeah, before I caught him groping my lady's maid in the storage closet. I was twelve, Emma. Like that even counts as a crush."_

_Emma coughed, clearly having not known that bit of information before Evie just told her. _

_"Right, well, I'm sure there'll be, erm, others."_

_"Let's just pick me out a dress and work it from there, okay?"_

_"Fine," Emma sighed. "Wear the blue one with the gold embroidery."_

_"But I –"_

_"Today is the day for cleavage, Evie," Emma said, lying back on the bed and sounding almost bored. "I haven't got that particular luxury yet."_

_"You aren't going to be married off at the age of sixteen either," Evie grumbled, low enough so that Emma couldn't hear. Walking behind her dressing screen, she poured herself a bowl of water and began to wash out the mud that had dirtied her skin as she peeled her dirty clothes from her body. Regretfully, she pulled on her corset, breathing in her last full breath for the next twelve hours. After slipping her dress on, she began to brush out her hair, rounding the dressing screen as Emma said:_

_"What, pray tell, is this?"_

_Emma was sitting on the edge of Evie's bed facing her bedside table with a letter in her hand. Evie noticed a blue rose sitting on the wood and may or may not have let out an incriminating gasp._

_"__**You were too beautiful to let go, and yet I know that daylight must take you home. But if you should want to return, simply touch the star, and you will be beside me. I hope I will see you tonight. I should very much like to kiss you again.**__"_

_"Emma…" Evie tried to say something, but she had nothing to say._

_"Well, this explains the dirtied clothing. You sure it was _just_ kissing?"_

_"EMMA!"_

_"What?" the Princess said with a smirk, "I read."_

_"But you…I…"_

_"Okay, okay," she said, seeing Evie's stuttering. "So who is he? Hang that. How did you manage to sneak out last night – actually, you know what, save it for later. I'm going to need something to distract me from the boredom of jousting. Be out in five otherwise mother's going to come and tell you off again."_

_Five minutes later, Evie was in the kitchens. It was past breakfast and she didn't want to bother the maids with coming up to the dining hall and serving her, so she grabbed some fruit off the servants pile and made to walk out._

_When she ran into a weary eyed and dishevelled squire by the name of Killian Jones._

_His mouth fell open when he saw her, and a brief amount of relief crossed his face before he took in the perfectly clean and well kept state of her and it turned to anger. He grabbed her by the arm and pushed her into a storage closet where they could talk more privately._

_"What the fuck is wrong with you, Evie?!" Killian's eyes were wild as the door shut behind them. "Do you have any idea how scared I was last night? What could have happened to someone like you? I… Fuck, Evie. Where did you go?"_

_"I…I went home," she lied, breathlessly, a little frightened by Killian's anger and language. She knew that it was common amongst the servants but since she only hung with Killian and no one else, she'd had no reason to hear it…_

_"You didn't see fit to tell me? To give me any recognition that I'm a human being who might actually worry about you?"_

_Evie couldn't answer Killian. His words were all truth. She'd run off with Pan for one amazing night without even thinking of the consequences. All she could do was look up at him apologetically and sincerely. But it wasn't enough. The quiet rage quelled but the hurt remained._

_"Evelyn!" Snow was calling from the stairwell. Evie left Killian in the storage closet and exited quickly and alone. "Oh, there you are. Emma said she saw you running down here." She was smiling for a moment before her brow furrowed. "Come upstairs quickly, I need to do something with your hair."_

_And as she sat in front of the Queen's stool in her quarters, Snow braided her brown waves in an intricate swirl around her head. If only for that moment, Evie did feel like a princess. But every time she thought of Killian or Peter, those thoughts faded from her mind. _

_And she knew that she desperately didn't want to be a princess anymore. _


	5. Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star

A/N: Muchas Gracias to aureaborealis for her idea of including Pan in this chapter. =)

And also, I just realised that the flower Emma has tattooed on her wrist is a Buttercup. And Jennifer Morrison only has it for the show. And guys, the Princess Bride allusions are legitly killing me right now.

Thank you for following and favouriting and reviewing! I love you guys, you make me keep writing!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Twinkle Twinkle Little Star**

xxx

**_Four Years Ago_**

_"So." Emma had just presented the winning medallion of the first round to Prince Phillip and was now standing behind her wooden throne in front of Evie who was lying down lazily with her eyes closed. "Did you like seeing…you really weren't watching at all were you."_

_"Au contraire," Evie answered. She was perfectly positioned to view the tents where the knights were mounting their steeds. Sir Percival was on his way, with Killian checking the reigns of the horse. In those breeches and shirt that clung to his very defined body, Evie couldn't think of a fitter sight._

_Well, except maybe Peter…_

_She shook her head and returned to her friend who had narrowed eyes and was following her line of sight._

_"Evie…"_

_"Well, I can stare, can't I?"_

_But Emma wasn't convinced and with wide eyes, comprehension dawned. "You were with _him?_"_

_"No! Well…" Evie hesitated. "Yes."_

_Emma huffed impatiently. "It's one or the other, Evie."_

_"Fine," she said, with a frown. "I was."_

_Emma's face changed then, from one of frustration to one of a best friend with a very secretive secret._

_"So, was he good?"_

_"EMMA!"_

_"Well, I'm not a prude. I've heard the rumours."_

_"But I…we didn't… You know me!"_

_"Unfortunately, I do," Emma sighed. "And you're a terrible liar. You weren't with him _all_ night."_

_Evie's silence spoke more than she could say. _

_"Evie, you harlot!" Emma said teasingly._

_"I am not!" she said in response. _

_"Well, with those girls…" Emma pointed at Evie's protruding breasts._

_"You told me to wear this!"_

_"That was before I knew you had boys jumping on you!"_

_"You're a horrible best friend!"_

_"You're a terrible excuse for a sister!"_

_"You're a…what?" Evie stopped mid sentence, a little confused by what Emma had just called her. But Emma wasn't sorry for calling Evie her sister. It was about time anyway. They bickered like they were, and they'd known each other since they were born even if it had only been two years that Evie had lived with them._

_Emma was saved a response by King David calling the beginning of the next round. But it didn't help Emma's words from swirling around her head._

_Sister._

_She'd never had a sister. She'd barely had a mother and father and now they were gone. She wasn't too sure what it meant. But, well, whatever it was, she kind of liked it._

xxx

_Killian Jones's thoughts were on everything but the task he was supposed to be doing. The minute he dragged Sir Percival into the tent, bleeding profusely from his sternum, he was off to find the medic. But the moment he sent the bumbling man to tend to his Knight's wounds, he couldn't face going back there. He needed space and air. He needed – _

_"Princess."_

_"Killian."_

_"I'm not too sure you should be addressing me by my Christian name, Your Highness."_

_"Killian," Evie pleaded, taking a step forward. "You have no idea how sorry I am…"_

_"Please don't, Evie," he sighed in defeat, before looking up at her and seeing the way that she looked. It seemed that earlier he'd been too preoccupied with actually seeing her that he hadn't, well, actually _seen_ her._

_"Eyes front, Killian," Evie said quickly, a little annoyed. "Emma picked the dress."_

_"She, erm." Killian's mouth was dry. "She picked well."_

_Evie's eyes narrowed as she crossed her arms over her chest; really not helping Killian's direction of sight. But when the trumpet sounded, signifying the start of the semi-final rounds, Evie knew she had to go back her lounge seat. And sleep._

_She wasn't going to say anything else to Killian, but he caught her arm as she tried to leave._

_"Happy Birthday, Evie."_

_She nodded, and walked away._

xxx

_Evie didn't make it back to her seat before the next round started. Instead, just as she was coming back to the stands, she felt an arm pulling her forcefully around the corner. Her mouth opened in surprise as she made to protest, but before she could, there was familiar set of lips pressing on her own and she melted into them, her eyes closing as she lost herself in the feel of the hands that circled her waist and held her close._

_Threading her hands up around his neck, she pulled away for air, stroking her hands through his hair._

_"I thought you didn't want to see me until tonight?" Evie whispered, a smile playing at her lips._

_"I never said that," Pan smirked. "I said I _hoped_ I would see you. I got tired of waiting."_

_"That much is evident," Evie said, smiling at him. She pulled his hand into hers as they walked behind the back of the seat stalls, the rise and fall of the crowd's noise signifying much of what was going on in the tournament._

_"You're not enjoying the tournament?"_

_"It's not really my scene," she shrugged. "I'd much prefer a small garden party. Or even just a picnic, or something. I don't know. A tournament isn't really my idea of fun. Half the people don't even know it's my birthday anyway. The King and Queen don't make it common knowledge."_

_"Ah yes, because you're a...Princess?" Pan said it as almost a question. _

_Evie furrowed her brow, confirming, "You didn't know?"_

_"Well I do now…_Princess._"_

_"You call me Princess and I'm never coming to Neverland again," Evie warned. _

_"Oh, really?" Pan questioned, cocking his eyebrow. He stopped their walk by pushing her back into the wood passionately. Barely a whisper away from his lips. "You sure about that, Princess Evelyn Rose Asteri?"_

_With a smirk, Evie pulled him into her and switched their places so that she was the one pressing him against the stands. "I'm pretty sure, Pan," she answered, breathing on his lips. "Pretty. Damn. Sure."_

_"Well, should we seal our names with a kiss then, Evie?" But her lips were already on his, his tongue sweeping along her lower lip and begging entrance. Evie's hands were fisting his unfamiliar shirt in her hands. She wasn't used to him wearing this world's clothes. Last night he'd worn his normal clothes, his Neverland clothes._

_These were much simpler._

_There was a passion in the way Pan held her to him, battling her tongue with his own until he broke away laughing._

_"I think I've dragged you away from your people for long enough, Evie."_

_"Not nearly," she answered, pecking him on the lips once more before removing herself from him. _

_"Never mind, you'll see me tonight."_

_"That, I most definitely will," Evie answered with a wide grin as she scampered off around the stands to where she needed to be._

_And as she walked away, Pan pressed his fingers to his lips, a spark still tingling on them and he smirked as he left with a slight spring in his step. _

_This was going to be easier than he thought._

xxx

**Present Day**

Evie was bouncing Ash in her arms as she tried to hush her crying. She was shushing her lightly when Killian finally came in after cleaning down the tables after dinner.

"You need to go and tuck the girls in," Killian said wearily as he held his hands out for Ash, before sinking into the nearest seat by the fire. This time, however, Ash didn't stop crying.

"I'll try and calm her down," Killian promised as Evie glanced back, assuring him she would be quick in her rounds. She started with the older ones who were still up reading in their rooms. They didn't have lights out times, they just had be-in-your-rooms-with-the-door-closed times. She bid them goodnight and shut their doors before heading down the hall and tucking in the younger girls.

"I'm excited for Saturday, Mom," Xenia said, as Evie pulled up her covers. Honestly, it was impossible to stem her excitement for anything. Since Evie had found her seven months ago, hiding in an empty ale crate, starved and weak, she had grown into a vivacious young girl, eager to go out and see the world.

It was a routine of theirs, that every Saturday, Evie and Killian would take the girls that wanted to, out for a few hours. Normally it wasn't into town. Instead, they would head along the road to the next portside village.

"Yeah, where are we going?" Lily asked from across the room.

"You two need to calm down and go to sleep," Evie warned, as she pulled up Lily's covers. "Otherwise Saturday down at the wharf in Serentai might be a little too tiring for both of you."

"Serentai!"

Evie raised her eyebrows at their excited response.

"Night, Mom!" They replied in unison before Evie blew out the candle by the door and they each doused the ones by their beds. After a few more rooms, Evie was at Tara and Kala's. The two of them were lying on one bed with a large picture book open in front of them. They were turning the pages much too quickly…

"Hi girls! Bed time!" Evie said softly as she walked into the room. Tara scampered into her bed and under the covers as Kala, regretfully, closed the book. Evie picked it up gently and placed it on the table between their beds. "Snow White?" she questioned.

Kala and Tara both seemed confused for a moment, and when they nodded, it was more in acceptance than agreement. They hadn't known.

"Do you want me to teach you how to read, girls?"

Both of their faces lit up in excitement as they nodded profusely.

"Okay," Evie answered with a satisfied nod. "We'll start tomorrow. But now, it's time for sleep."

"Goodnight, mom," Kala said as she pulled the covers up to her neck. Evie placed a soft kiss on her forehead before saying, "Sweet dreams, Kala."

Pushing the blankets up over Tara, she planted a kiss on the older girl's forehead too. "Sleep tight, Tara."

"You too," she said with a warm smile as Evie headed to the doorway. Dousing the lights, she headed back down the hallway towards where she could still hear Ash's feint crying. Shutting the door behind her, she heard Killian's low humming as he rocked Ash in his arms. He looked up when Evie came in, his eyes wide, "She won't stop. I changed her, I played with her, I sang to her. You fed her right?"

"Only an hour ago," Evie answered, holding her arms out for Ash. Killian seemed hesitant to part with her, but eventually, Evie had Ash in her arms once more, patting her back softly as her loud cries dulled into low whimpers.

Killian's face furrowed in confusion as Ash calmed down in Evie's arms. She hadn't done that in a very long time. But she was still gurgling in dissatisfaction.

"Maybe you should sing for her…" Killian suggested.

"I don't exactly have your voice."

"No," Killian said slowly, "You have _your_ voice. And it's nowhere near horrible. Besides, it always used to calm her down when you first came here."

"That was seven months ago, Killian," she sighed, but she took his advice anyway. With the bundle of shuffling blankets in her arms, she began to hum a familiar melody before settling into the words after a verse.

"Then the traveller in the dark,  
Thanks you for your tiny spark,  
He could not see which way to go,  
If you did not twinkle so.

In the dark blue sky you keep,  
And often through my curtains peep,  
For you never shut your eye,  
'Till the sun is in the sky.

As your bright and tiny spark,  
Lights the traveller in the dark.  
Though I know not what you are,  
Twinkle, twinkle, little star."

By the time Evie finished, Ash was looking up at her with wide green eyes, her face in awe. But then they slowly began to close and Evie kept swaying until she was assured that the little girl was asleep. Laying her in her crib, she watched her breathe evenly before giving a relieved sigh and turning back to Killian who was looking just as relieved as she was.

"I'll stay with her tonight," Evie said with a soft sigh.

"I'm not tired," Killian replied, but Evie looked at him doubtfully, the shadows under his eyes giving him away.

"Well if you aren't going to leave, take the bed."

"Evie –"

"Goodnight, Killian," Evie said in finality, taking her seat by the fire. No book, no writing. She just sat there, staring into the ever-changing flames long into the night, pondering how long she could remain under this pretence of safety with Pan so near.

"Goodnight Princess," Killian murmured into his pillow. But Evie didn't hear.

* * *

**_The Star - Jane Taylor_**


	6. Wake Up

A/N: Am I the only one who feels like they've left the filming of the second half of the season a little late? I mean, if Adam and Eddy are writing 3x19 now, and something goes drastically wrong where they get writers block, and actors are sick, and then the editing takes a bajillion years (which, judging from what I've done myself, it does) like, they'd be finishing a day before they have to give it to the station.

That being said, homygosh, I desperately need to work in the television industry. I don't care if it's in post production or writing or being that assistant to the assistant director who does the coffee rounds. I need this.

And Australia's television industry sucks. You have Neighbours and Home and Away and that's about it.

Rant over. That is all.

Hope you guys are enjoying this! Leave me a review if you are; I don't bite (heaps).

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Wake Up**

**xxx**

_** Four Years Ago**_

_"Seven steps north, fifty metres west…"_

_"What are we even looking for, Pan?" Evie couldn't deny her frustration._

_"We're looking for stars, Evie," Pan smirked._

_"Stop being frustrating!"_

_"But I love teasing you, Evie," he answered, giving her a glance that hinted at more than what Evie considered at the time. But he didn't push it any further and the comment went over her head._

_"So, the treasure is made up of the most beautiful things you can find on the island. The lost boys and I have taken to calling them stars because of the way they shine." And the cross dimensional magic they emitted, not that he was going to tell her that. Or about the one that sat around her neck. Or the one that was sitting on the chain below his shirt._

_She was just behind him as they walked through the night of Neverland, branches and tree roots unavoidable. She tripped at one stage, but kept walking, and Pan thought nothing had happened. Until her breathing became sharper behind him and he spun around, an annoyed gleam in his eyes. But Evie was limping behind him, trying to ignore the pain shooting up her leg with each step, lest she seem weak in Pan's eyes. She already knew she was the underdog in this foreign environment, and Pan was obviously older…_

_But she couldn't stand the pain anymore, and her leg finally gave out. She was wearing breeches and a shirt with a coat in order to protect against the ferns, but her pants were less than friendly when it came to thorns. Leaning up against a tree, she leant down to touch it the wound and Evie couldn't help the words that escaped her._

_"Shit, that hurts!"_

_Pan chuckled at her outburst before he came down to see what was wrong and his face grew into a mask tainted by worry._

_"Why didn't you say something?"_

_"It wasn't too bad. I thought it was just a scratch."_

_"Scratches can do a lot of harm around here," Pan said, his face growing more frantic with each passing moment. He was peeling aside the split in her pants and staring at the cut inquisitively._

_"It wasn't a black plant was it …"_

_Evie thought back. No, everything around them had been green, and…red…_

_"It was red," she said with certainty. A closer look at the cut revealed her words to be truth, with only blood being visible and no black venom of Dreamshade._

_"That's good." Evie couldn't tell if that was a hint of disappointment in his voice. The pain made it fairly difficult to concentrate on anything. Pan's face was hard as he continued, "We need to get this cleaned up."_

_"But the treasure –"_

_"Will still be there tomorrow," Pan answered, sweeping her up into his arms with only the briefest of painful yelps from her lips. "Besides, it's more of a game for the lost boys than for you and I."_

_"So…" Evie was distracted momentarily for a moment as she processed that. Realisation dawned, "It was just an excuse to spend time with me."_

_Pan didn't answer, keeping his strides even as he carried her through the forest. His face was hard, staring straight ahead. _

_"You going to talk, Pan?"_

_"Not if I can help it," he answered, as Evie began to hear the sound of a creek streaming nearby. For the first time, in Pan's presence, she found herself frowning. _

_He placed her down gently by the water's edge, before placing her calf into the softly trickling water. Evie hissed as he began to roll the material up towards her knee. Without the remnants of the plant and the stain of her blood, the wound actually didn't look too bad. But silently, Pan was pulling off his tunic and ripping off the bottom of his shirt in order to create a bandage for her._

_As he wrapped it around her leg gently, Evie watched his face. He was concentrating entirely upon the task at hand and trying not to let himself think too much. He was angry because he'd wished it _had_ been Dreamshade. He could have given her the water and she would have been his forever._

_And he questioned why, why somewhere in him, there was a part of him that didn't actually want that._

_He may have tied the bandage a little tighter than normal, and felt Evie jolt, but that didn't stop him from tenderly running his hands up to her knee before gently rolling her breeches back down to cover it._

_"All done," Pan murmured, finally daring himself to look up at her. Her brown eyes were looking at him questioningly, and he tried his best to ignore his thoughts. Stick to the initial plan, he reminded himself. Because that plan was sure to succeed. _

_Evie noticed the wave that passed over his darkened face. All of a sudden, that sparkling green mischievousness was back in his face and he said, "Surely carrying you all this way and ruining my shirt to bind your wound deserves something, Evie."_

_"Some truthfulness would be nice as well, Pan. And deserved too."_

_Damn it. He thought her being smart would make her fun, not a prying nuisance._

_"Maybe I did just want to spend time with you, Evie," he said with a smirk, as he crawled up to her. "Maybe I brought you here so that you could be with me."_

_"And that's all?" _

_"That's all," Pan lied with a perfect smile that made Evie take his head in her hands and kiss him feverishly. _

_"I do still kind of want to see those stars though," Evie admitted when she pulled away. Pan was reluctant to move his hand from her waist, and so rather than letting her walk on her own, the moment she was standing, he knelt down in front of her, giving her his back._

_"Hop on," he dared her. Evie's eyes widened, but it didn't stop her. She climbed on nimbly, laughing as he set off into the woods. _

_Princesses didn't get piggybacks. _

_But in Neverland, Evie was glad she wasn't a princess._

xxx

_"What the hell happened to you?"_

_Emma had been in lessons all morning, but it was post lunch now. And after spending her morning in the library, Evie was now sitting with a sketchpad in the gardens. But unfortunately, Emma was perceptive and she knew how Evie normally sat when she was drawing. On the ground._

_Instead, she had her knees drawn up on the edge of the seat, biting down on her lip as she tried to draw with a precision that currently eluded her. Occasionally her hand would jolt down to press on her leg, the healing wound giving her phantom pains every so often._

_And Emma, walking up to her, happened to notice all of this in one glance._

_"I tripped."_

_Emma's eyes narrowed and she took no hesitancy in reaching over and pulling up Evie skirt to her knee where she saw the minimal blood seeping through the bandage. She dropped the material back down quickly and folded her arms expectantly._

_"Unless you tripped and fell on a knife, I'll ask again. And, who, may I ask, is this?"_

_Emma had the sketchbook out of Evie's hands before she could say anything. Evie, in that moment, made the promise to work on her reflexes so that stuff like that would stop happening._

_"It was a thorn; and that," she snatched it back, "thank you very much, is Pan."_

_"Peter Pan?" Emma said with her eyes wide. "The boy you were with on your birthday?"_

_Evie nodded, looking at the picture, afraid to look up at her sister._

_And it was for a reason, because when she eventually did, Emma was frowning at her. Sitting down beside Evie, the expression didn't leave her._

_"You know, I'm not sure about this guy, Evie."_

_"That's just because you haven't met him yet, Emma!" Evie said, turning to Emma quickly as she put the papers aside. "Oh, he's lovely! A perfect gentlemen with the most wonderful smile and grin. He's cheeky and young but he's old and wise and he's –"_

_"It's just a crush, Evie," Emma said softly, her shining green eyes meeting Evie's as the young girl spiralled back down to earth. "You know that's all it can be."_

_"I know that, Emma," she said, an edge of frustration in her voice. "But I've got two years left of freedom. I'm not going to spend it here while I'm waiting for some Prince to come and take me as his prize. I'm not just the Princess of Talinor! I don't want to –"_

_Evie stopped herself before she could betray her feelings. So what if it was what her parents had planned. They were dead; it didn't matter anymore. Emma saw how upset the topic had made her and threw her arms around her best friend comfortingly._

_"I'm sorry for bringing it up, Evie," Emma whispered genuinely. "You do have two years. I just…he does live in a different realm."_

_"And at night," Evie answered, pulling away, a wistful happiness flooding her tired face, "So do I."_

xxx

**Present Day**

When Killian woke up before dawn the next morning, Evie was dozing. Her eyes were closed and her head sinking onto her shoulder. Killian couldn't help the small smile that graced his face as he spotted her. He slipped his shoes on, followed by his coat. Heading out, he travelled down the corridor towards his room where he drew himself a bath, cleansing his body for the new day.

He was gone for little over fifteen minutes in his room. And pulling his leathers on, he returned to Ash's room where Evie was still sound asleep.

He felt a twinge of happiness run through him at the sight, and began to run his hand across the smooth skin of her cheek. He stiffened when he felt her stir, but she merely nuzzled further into his palm murmuring, "I don't want to go back home just yet."

"Evie?"

The sound of Killian's voice jolted Evie awake and she flinched away from his touch, her eyes seeking his out in horrified surprise.

"Sorry," he muttered, completely untruthfully.

"What are you doing?" Evie asked breathily.

"I was waking you up," Killian continued to lie, ignoring the hurt that was edging at him with the distance in her gaze. "We're rostered on for breakfast duty."

"Oh, okay." She took the lie, ignoring the possibility of the truth because that would make things weird and she knew exactly what she didn't want from Killian. "What's the time?"

"It's almost six thirty," Killian responded.

"I'd better wake Ash then."

Evie walked over to the crib, looking down at the little girl fondly.

"Who was he?"

Evie looked up at Killian from where she was gently waking Ash from sleep. Ash had only woken once in the night and it wasn't loud enough to awaken Killian, so Evie had fed her and put her back down quickly. The little girl had definitely had enough sleep for the moment. Evie, however, was simply ignoring Killian, even though she knew it was childish. Eventually though, when she had Ash stirring awake in her arms, she turned back to him.

"That's really none of your concern, Hook."

And knowing Evie only called him Hook when she shut herself off, he bowed out gracefully. But just as he was walking out of the door he heard her muttering almost indistinctly.

"It doesn't matter anyway. He left me."

But she couldn't lie and say that he was never coming back. Because he already had.

And she was doing all she could to forget that beautiful dream that Killian had awoken her from, because she knew exactly what to expect from Pan. It wasn't the loving touches she'd used to know, no hidden playfulness...

When she saw Pan again - and she knew she would - he wouldn't be the boy she fell in love with.

He would be the boy who took her heart and abandoned her.

And Evie couldn't possibly forgive him for that.


	7. Plans

A/N: So, hehe, I know I said a full past chapter might not happen again...well...

There's just so much more story to be told than I initially realised. =P

So here you have it! I may not get a chapter up tomorrow because I have work in the morning (so nervous - first day - freaking out - so apologies if this chapter sucks) and then, as a reward, I'm going to the beach (its going to be freezing and raining, but I've lived in Sydney all my life and never been to a beach in Sydney, so...) and it's also my dad's birthday. (Yes, excuses, excuses, I know. Forgive me?)

_Scorpion girl: You know Pan too well. ;)_

Here's our chapter for today! Enjoy my lovelies! And thank you for your reviews. They made my day!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Plans**

xxx

**_Four Years Ago_**

_"Ergh, Felix," Pan sighed. "The girl is so annoying. I honestly don't know how long it's going to take. Right now all she's giving me is puppy love and I'm going to need to do something much more intense to get her to love me. She's been broken by something…her circumstances perhaps? But she's a princess! Her life is easy…"_

_"I wouldn't assume that, Pan," Felix answered thoughtfully as the two of them watched the writhing mass above them. Pan nodded to the boy standing on his other side and the rope the lost boy held slid through his fingers, the mass above them dropping until he was revealed to be another boy, suspended by his feet and dangling precariously above the rocky ground._

_"Alright, Rufio," Pan said, walking around the boy who was fighting against the ropes. His face was turning red, but Pan didn't exactly care at that point. "Remind me again what I told you to do."_

_"Clear the paths," Rufio gasped, the pressure surely crushing his windpipe, "make sure there was nothing that could harm the girl."_

_"That's right," Pan said with a wide grin, almost applauding the boy for getting the answer correct. But then Pan was squatting, staring the boy straight in the face as he continued darkly._

_"So why did I find myself patching her up because of what was clearly something that you failed to complete."_

_Rufio had no answer._

_"Cut him down and leave him up on Dead Man's Peak for a day." Pan heard the yelp of fright as Rufio's fear took hold of him._

_"Why ," Pan taunted, "You aren't afraid of heights are you, laddie?"_

_But Pan could see it in his eyes, and it made him smirk._

_"Let it serve as warning to the rest of you. You do not half arse your duties, you do not disobey me and most importantly, you do not fear."_

_Pan walked away from all of the lost boys gathered round and stood beside Felix again, continuing where they left off as Rufio, defeated, was dragged carelessly away from camp._

_"So, I need a plan of attack, Felix. You guys need to find those stars tonight. And I know they're only visible when she's here, so I'm going to try and get her early so we have as much time as possible. But I really need them soon so we can have scouts on the other side, you know? I need eyes in the Enchanted Forest, so when the time comes, my takeover won't be a failed attempt."_

_"You never fail," Felix commented, with a furrowed brow. "We won't let you."_

_"Good," Pan smiled, satisfied with his right hand man. "So head to where you left off yesterday. I'm going to go and get Evie. Find those stars."_

_Felix nodded as Pan reached for the star carved on the necklace beneath his shirt, and touched it lightly, disappearing from sight – disappearing from Neverland._

_And arriving in Evie's room._

xxx

_"You're looking incredibly tired, Evie," Snow was saying across the dinner table. Of course, then everyone looked up to take a closer look at Evie. It was undeniable that she had shadows under her eyes and a jauntiness about her figure. She was swirling her uneaten food on her plate as Snow continued, "You should go to bed early tonight."_

_Evie's face lit up unexpectedly at that and the entire family frowned._

_"Can I go to sleep now! I really, really am tired."_

_"If you're sure…" Snow said in concern. "Goodnight then, Evie."_

_Snow's words were followed by David's and Emma's before Evie tried to contain her excitement by walking slowly to the door. Of course, she then broke into a run, eager to get back to her room and lock the door before heading off to see Pan._

_But when she ran into her room, she ran into him. And his hands wound around her instinctively to clutch her body to his. _

_"Ready to go then, Evie?"_

_"After you, good sir."_

_And he touched her necklace gently. A split second later, they were gone._

xxx

_Emma was walking through the castle like a woman on a mission. It was much after lights out, in fact, it was possibly early morning, but she hadn't checked. The minute she'd gone up to Evie's room to say goodnight and picked the lock on her door, the girl hadn't been there, and Emma's eyes had narrowed as she stared at the empty space. Grabbing the sketchbook off her side table, she had stalked across the hall to her room and spent the past few hours perusing all the books she'd borrowed from the library on Neverland whilst staring at Evie's picture of Peter Pan._

_Finally, Emma grew tired of the effort, and began to walk towards the only other person she thought might know anything about the boy. Since, after all, it had been him who snuck her out of the castle in the first place._

_By the time she reached the servants' stair, she was impatient, and so the knocking that she did on Killian's door wasn't exactly polite. When he eventually came to the door, he was dishevelled and bleary eyed from sleep, but at least he had his shirt on, because even Emma knew that the squire was attractive. She didn't need confirmation._

_Not that she would ever admit that, lest her parents have a fit. Sure they were all about true love…_

_But really, Killian Jones was every parent's worst nightmare._

_"Princess! What in God's name are you…er…what on earth are you doing here?"_

_Emma waved away his attempt at correcting his manners with a firm sweep of her hand. "Spare me the niceties. Are you going to let me in?"_

_"Er…I don't think it would be wise…"_

_Emma pushed the older boy out of the way before he could give her any words about how she was a Princess and shouldn't be in boys' rooms at night. She knew those things, especially with people like him, and she was giving herself a constant rehash of those warnings every two seconds._

_"I'd prefer not to be caught in the doorway," Emma said, taking a seat on the wooden chair by his cupboard. The room was simple, but she supposed, that was all he was given in his present status._

_"Then perhaps it would be best if you hadn't come at all?" Killian suggested, still standing in the doorway and waiting for her to leave. He could lose his job over this. Actually, never mind his job, King David would have his head for even speaking in a room alone with his daughter._

_Which reminded him._

_"What are you doing here, Princess?" He shut the door reluctantly, not wanting to get caught just as much as she did. But it was strange. He was pretty sure they'd never spoken more than a paragraph to each other in the four years he'd lived in the castle. And normally it was her asking him to do something like fix her horse's reigns or saddle – not that it was his job, he was just the closest person at the time._

_"I need to talk to you about Evie."_

_"Oh." That, at least, made more sense. A mutual friend. Killian still kept his distance, however, taking a place on the edge of his bed and continuing, "Go on."_

_"She's not acting like herself," Emma said frankly. It was true. The Evie that Emma and Killian knew, sure, she _dreamed_ of adventure, but she never sought it out. Sneaking out with Killian seemed a huge step for her, let alone crossing worlds for a boy she barely knew. "This boy…he's…he's not looking after her. Why is she so tired? She's not sleeping; she spends every waking moment thinking about him and instead of looking after herself, she's pining after him. I just…"_

_"I just wish that she would grow up!" Emma threw her hands up in frustration. "She keeps doing these things and thinking that no one notices. Sneaks out, runs away; leaves us hanging around waiting. It's not right! For anyone, let alone a Princess."_

_"I know, Princess," Killian's brow furrowed, interested by the Emma's need to rant and taking in every word. "But we can't change her."_

_"Can't we?" Emma wasn't looking defeated, she wasn't staring at the ground as Killian had been doing moments ago. "Jones, if I can come up with a plan to keep her here. Will you help?"_

_"I…" His brow furrowed. She was happy wasn't she? Evie, with that boy. She was happy…_

_"Just tell me what I have to do."_

_"I will when I've had time to think," Emma said, her face deep in concentration as she stood up. "Whatever's going on with her…I just want her back. I want her safe. I don't trust Pan."_

_"You and me both, love," Killian sighed before stopping himself and glancing over at her. Emma had raised her eyebrow at the pet name but didn't say anything. Instead, she rose gracefully to her feet and went to open the door. He met her in the doorway as if to move her out of his room faster._

_"I can see why Evie likes you," Emma said with a quick glance at him, something cheeky brewing in her eyes. "You're quite the gentleman."_

_"So when are we going to further discuss this plan Your Highness?" he said, quickly, eyes widening as he distracted her train of thought, "I honestly don't think this is the best place. Servants are notorious gossips."_

_Having heard the ruined state of his reputation, Emma already knew that._

_"Perhaps, down at the tavern," she joked, knowing exactly where he'd taken Evie the other night. A small grin pulled at his lips before he became serious once more. _

_"The stables?"_

_"Dawn," Emma added and Killian frowned. Tomorrow was his day off; he could sleep. But begrudgingly, he nodded. _

_"Tomorrow then, Princess."_

_"Oh, one more thing, Jones," Emma said, stopping the door before he could close it, "It's Emma."_

_"Whatever you say, Princess," he said, a grin playing at his lips as she rolled her eyes and walked away._

_But as he headed back to bed, he couldn't help but glance at the parchment by his bedside, littered with letters of fancy appeal for a life he knew would take him far away from here. A life upon the sea…_

_Because as far as Killian Jones could see, there was no longer any reason for him to stay._

_But he would hold off for now. At least until Evie was safe._

_Then, and only then, would he go._


	8. One Night

A/N: Spent twenty minutes changing my computer desktop to a collage of Robbie Kay and Colin O'Donoghue pictures.

I regret nothing.

So, anyway, after I updated last night, I ended up continuing to write half of this chapter and so, we do in fact have an update today.

Yays!

_Scorpion Girl: Hehe, even I find it hard to choose between them. Every. Single. Time. And thank you so much! xx_

_Aureaborealis: Dem plans. Let's watch them unfold. =D_

Here it is, my lovelies! Enjoy! xx

* * *

**One Night**

xxx

_**Four Years Ago**_

_"So," Evie said with a smirk, "Now that I've got you here all on your own…"_

_"One would think this was your tree house and not mine," Pan answered, mocking offence as he walked into the room after her. He went around the room lighting candles with a match before turning back to Evie who was meandering about the room as she looked around curiously. Pulling her jacket off absently, she dumped it on the end of Pan's bed._

_She felt his presence behind her as she looked out from his window at the view beyond the tree tops. His breath was hot on her bare neck, his smooth hands running up and down her arms. He wanted to make her forget all about the stars, they were none of her concern, not really._

_His lips brushed against her shoulder, skimming the collar of her dress and Evie tensed. It was the first time Pan had kissed her anywhere but her lips and it shocked her a little, as did the jolt of pleasure that ran through her body._

_"Pan?" There was a slight tremor to her voice. He still hadn't removed his lips from her skin and was simply moving along the curve of her neck, brushing aside her hair._

_"Yes, Evie?"_

_"What are you doing?"_

_"I'm kissing you," he murmured into the skin just behind her ear and she gasped. His hands were running up and down her sides now, from her hip to her ribs, edging to more forbidden places an inch at a time. "Don't you like it? It feels like you do."_

_"It feels…" Foreign. Strange. Intoxicating. "Good."_

_Pan smirked into her skin. Exactly what he wanted to hear._

_He ventured further then with his hands, brushing across her stomach and pulling it up to her collar, down towards the swell of her breasts where he traced delicate patterns into the skin. She was shivering beneath his touch as he continued to trace his lips along her flesh. Finally though, he needed to see her face, and spun her around in his arms so that he could look into her eyes._

_Her cheeks were flushed, and her eyes darkened with a hint of lust even if she wasn't quite sure what it was that she was lusting after. Pan brushed aside a curl that was lying in front of her eyes before placing a kiss on her temple and slowly moving towards her lips where he kissed her hungrily._

_He was pleasantly surprised when he found that she was crushing herself to him, kissing him back with equal, if not more, fervour. At some point, she'd slipped her tongue into his mouth, trying to gain the upper hand, but Pan always had that. And he was pulling her backwards towards where the mattress was welcoming them._

_Evie didn't seem to notice until her knees buckled and she fell onto the surface with a gasp of surprise. Realising where she was, her face flushed into a deep pink and she rolled over, away from Pan's approaching body. Sitting cross legged, she tried to calm her breathing as Pan bit down on his lip. _

_Too fast._

_"Sorry, Evie."_

_"No, no," she breathed, "It's fine. It was…" she hesitated, looking up at Pan, still hovering on the side of the bed. "I've only known you a few days, and I really don't know that much about you except for the fact that every time I look at you I get really distracted and feel things I've never felt before."_

_"Those feelings are good feelings, Evie," he said, sitting down and trying to reassure her. _

_"Are they?" she frowned._

_"If you want to know me, Evie," he said, fully prepared to lie through his teeth. "Just ask."_

_Evie thought for a moment then, before leaning forward until she was lying on the comfortable mattress with her face upon her hands. Patting the space beside her, she motioned for Pan to join her. It was only a second before he settled there and she started off a long train of questions that he inwardly cringed at, but he knew he had to answer._

_She just needed time. Someday, she would love him. She had to. _

_He needed her heat; he needed her love._

_That would give him power enough to take over the kingdom._

xxx

_When Evie disappeared to go home, Peter heard the sound of the Lost Boys in the distance. As they came closer, he headed downstairs._

_"Excellent boys!" Pan congratulated them all. Taking the pouch from them, he quickly counted the amount. Five stars ; five lost boys. That would have to do for now. He sighed inwardly in relief. At least he had time now. Time to let Evie fall in love with him without pushing her too fast. Everything was working out._

_"Slightly, Devon, James, Tim, Zip, you know what you have to do," Pan started, gathering them around himself. "I want you to take the treasure store and purchase that inn at any cost. We need a foothold in that realm and that's going to be it. I'll contact you when necessary. Any questions?"_

_They all shook their heads and Pan smiled darkly._

_"Good."_

xxx

_"I have it," Emma said, the minute she met a yawning Killian in the stables the next morning._

_"Have what?"_

_"The plan, Jones."_

_"Oh." He yawned once more. "Did you stay up all night plotting?"_

_"I may or may not have fallen asleep three minutes after arriving back at my room. But it came to me in my dream."_

_Killian eyed her doubtfully, "We're working off a dream."_

_"If it makes you feel better, call it a vision."_

_"It doesn't," Killian replied, leaning against a stall, "Continue."_

_"So, Evie gets a birthday ball amongst the innermost trust circle next week. It's not in my place to say, but she's supposed to find a suitor, who'll court her for two years and then marry her."_

_"What?!" Killian's mouth dropped open in horrified astonishment. He didn't realise this whole thing started _now_! He thought it started when she was sixteen._

_"Shh," Emma looked around in annoyance. "So, we need to find someone who will take her mind off Pan long enough for her to realise that she can stay here, safe and protected."_

_"No offence, Princess," Killian frowned, "But Evie has hated every Prince she's ever come across."_

_"Which is why we're going to find the least pompous and most easily corruptible of everyone at that ball, and we are going to make them act like you."_

_"Like me?!"_

_"Well," Emma reworded it, "The more, adventurous traits of you."_

_"I'm not exactly a role model, Princess," Hook answered. The horse behind him decided to snort awake at that point. "See, even Starry agrees."_

_"Yeah, well, that horse obviously doesn't want us to succeed," Emma answered as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Its loyalties plainly lie with Evie."_

_"It's a horse."_

_"Really?" Emma said sarcastically, "I hadn't realised. Are you going to help me or not?"_

_Killian wrestled with himself for a few moments before giving a resigned sigh. Starry was poking her head out from the stall and he patted her neck and answered Emma, "Fine, Princess. You win."_

_"You're in?"_

_"Yes I'm in."_

_"Fantastic," Emma grinned, taking a step closer to him, "Well then, Jones, we'd better get started. Start dealing out the charm. I need to know what to teach out prince."_

_"I don't need to prepare myself for that, love," he said, a smile pulling his lips upwards. "I _am_ charm."_

_And Emma, staring at his shit-eating grin, couldn't help but wordlessly agree._

xxx

**Present Day**

Evie was braiding Kala's hair that night as the storybook passed around the room. Along with Tara and Kala, Freya, Hayley, Sara, Dena and Jasmine had all tagged along to the reading lesson. Even though they all had varying degrees and abilities, they all wanted to hear the story of Snow White.

Eventually, when Kala's hair was tied off down her back, the young girl placed a kiss on Evie's cheek and sat down at her place in the circle, only to be replaced by many pleading eyes and Evie beckoned the next girl, Freya to take Kala's place. Freya had extremely long hair, but Evie's hands were well practiced after having so many girls around her for the past eight months.

When they reached the end of the tale, Evie tucked all the girls in and went back to Ash's room. She stood in the doorway for a moment, watching as Ash reached up to tug on Killian's hair. The man had fallen asleep with the child in his arms, but Ash wasn't so easily placated.

Peeling her carefully away from Killian, Evie looked down into her eyes with a sad little smile.

"Oh, little star," she murmured with a soft smile. "You really love Killian don't you?"

And her green eyes widened as if to say, 'Yes Evie. Of course I do!'

"Time for bed though," Evie said, rocking her in her arms and humming her soft lullaby until she fell asleep. Placing her back in the crib, Evie considered waking Killian up as she went to go to her own room, but she knew he'd wake up the minute Ash cried, so it wasn't really a problem.

That was, until Evie heard a knock on the door.

Her heart began to beat fearfully as she heard it. _No. Not so soon. He couldn't be here…_

The knock came again.

She considered waking Killian once more, but he'd have his hook in Pan's body before Evie could even get in a word sideways. His protectiveness was good sometimes, but this…

This was something she had to do herself.

Closing the door, she walked her way down the corridor and creaked open the door cautiously. To her relief, it wasn't Pan. However, it was another face she wasn't looking forward to seeing.

"Felix?" Evie said stonily. She wasn't surprised; someone had to drop by soon, be it Pan or one of his minions. Instead of lingering in the doorway, she shut the door, stepping outside and wrapping her shawl tightly around herself as she felt the coolness of the night.

"He wants to see you tomorrow." Felix didn't dance around the problem. He respected Evie more than that.

"Of course he does," Evie said, folding her arms to avoid the shaking running through them. "He's here for his bloody takeover isn't he?"

"He is."

"So why does he fucking want me?" Evie couldn't help the hiss of anger that escaped her.

"Only he knows," Felix answered. "So, will you be there?"

Evie sighed, thinking of everyone inside her stronghold that she was trying to protect. She couldn't let them down, not now after everything she'd done to keep them safe. All of her lost girls…

"What time?"

"11.30 tomorrow night; the tavern."

Evie bit her lip as she thought back to the first time she'd seen Pan. If this was his way of trying to be poetic it was only making him seem more twisted in her mind. Nevertheless, as she backed into the door, opening it slightly, she answered Felix:

"I'll be there."

And when she slipped in through the door, closing it and locking it behind her, it was with a fearful longing that she slid to the floor, her back against the wood.

And that was how Killian found her, hours later when he awoke with a crick in his neck. Her head in her hands; her knees at her chin.

"Leave me alone, Killian," Evie whispered when he asked her what was wrong. "I didn't need your fucking help eight months ago and I don't need it right now. Just…just look after the girls."

She left off the unspoken end to that sentence.

Look after the girls…

_Because tomorrow night I might not be coming home._


	9. Prince Francis

A/N: Hehe, so yeah, this seems to be happening alot.

Another past chapter.

But, excitement, Evie meets Pan again next chapter!

Thanks so m_uch_ for reading, following, favouriting and reviewing! I love you guys!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Prince Francis**

xxx

_**Four Years Ago**_

_"Gold, clothing, and Prince Francis has been disposed of."_

_"Francis?" Felix was looking at Pan, horrified, as the boy handed over a bag of gold and clothing. "You expect me to masquerade for two years with the name _Francis_?!"_

_"What's wrong with Francis?" Pan was staring him down._

_"Nothing, nothing…" Felix trailed off._

_"It's not going to be two years anyway. The point is to get her family to turn on her," Pan said. "Make her feel alone, so that she'll simply come running back to me."_

_"I honestly don't understand why this is necessary Pan. Isn't she already coming to you every night?"_

_"Not in the way that I'd like," Pan answered, raising his eyebrow at Felix. "Which reminds me. You will have to get close to her for this, make others think that you are actually courting her, but never make her believe it. You may need to touch her, kiss her, but I swear, if one word gets back to me that you are enjoying it, I will flay your skin from your flesh and carve your flesh from your bone. With a blunt knife."_

_"Understood, Pan," Felix said, the mental image sending a shiver of fear through him._

_"So. I want monthly reports back to me. I've already told her that I might not see her for a while because I have to prepare the island for Winter or some stupid shit like that, and she was sad, but, she'll be okay. After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder."_

_Felix nodded before Pan pulled the necklace from around his neck, the star on the end of it glittering beautifully._

_"You're trapping yourself if you give me this, Pan," Felix commented._

_"Only for the time being," Pan answered Felix. "I expect to see you in a month with word of my…beloved."_

_"Of course," Felix said with a nod, before taking the star and disappearing from Pan's sight._

xxx

_A week later, Emma and Snow were standing impatiently in Evie's room as they waited for her to come out from behind her dressing screen._

_"Evie! You're going to have to come out sometime soon!"_

_"Not if I don't want to!"_

_"I will come in there and drag you out myself," Emma warned, her footsteps approaching Evie who finally cried out, "Fine!"_

_She stepped out from behind the screen, her face holding the utmost contempt for what she was doing, but both Emma and Snow's faces lit up when they saw her. Her hair was falling in brown curls past her shoulders, the dress she had chosen, a pale lavender that draped ethereally to the floor, gave the illusion of a mythical being standing in front of Snow and Emma._

_"No Prince will be able to keep their eyes off you, Evie!" Snow commented with a wide smile before Evie turned around. And looking at herself, she couldn't help the tears that began to fall from her eyes. If only Pan had been here…to see her like this…_

_"Evie…"_

_"Let me, mother," Emma said to Snow, who reluctantly left the room. Approaching Evie gently, Emma asked softly, "Is this about, you know…him?"_

_"I don't want to talk about it, Emma." Evie said, walking away from Emma to go and find her shoes. "It was necessary for him to go and fix some things in Neverland for a few months. And I know I only knew him for a week but I still miss him. I don't even know when I'll see him again."_

_"Hey, Evie," Emma walked over to her in concern, pulling her into her arms in a warm hug. "You know that you've got us, right?"_

_"Of course. It's just," Evie sighed into Emma's shoulder, "He was different."_

_"Maybe you'll find someone just as different tonight."_

_Evie seriously doubted it._

_But still, she made her entrance and watched every man between the ages of sixteen and twenty widen their eyes in awe. Glancing around, she recognised many of their faces, but some were still unknown to her. She knew her duty tonight. Dance. With every single one of them. _

_She grew more and more tired with each passing suitor. Each man had the same jokes, the same passing comments about her dress, her unwavering beauty. Until she came face to face with Prince Francis._

_He was the least pompous man that she had spoken to all night. His hair was a little less tamed than many of those surrounding him and he had an air about him that said, whilst he respected himself, he wasn't trying to woo her._

_It was refreshing._

_He didn't try and shower her with fancy compliments or boasting, instead, he took her hand, placed his on her waist and brought them into the waltz with ease – silently._

_Eventually, Evie grew tired of his silence and said, "May I ask with whom I'm dancing?"_

_"Francis, Your Grace," the Prince, who Evie didn't know was merely Felix in disguise, said politely. She'd never met Pan's right hand man before._

_'This one,' Emma mouthed across the room at Killian. He cocked his head at her curiously, not fully understanding her. He beckoned her towards his corner and she excused herself from the men around her who were just as keen to court her as they were to court Evie, even if Emma had about ten more years until she would consider marriage._

_"Master Jones!" Emma mocked offense as she reached him, "Pulling a Princess into the shadows. My my, good form just went out the window."_

_"You think Francis is the one?"_

_"Prince Francis," Emma corrected, glancing over at the conversation ongoing between the Prince and Evie. Whatever he was saying just made her laugh. "And yes. I mean, look at them, I saw her smile! I may not even have to teach him your charm."_

_She used to smile at me, Killian thought to himself, but he put it away in the back of his mind. This wasn't about him. This was all about Evie._

xxx

_Prince Francis was offered to stay in the castle after that night, not that Evie minded. It was nice to have a friend around after Pan stopped seeing her. She was distracted and it was nice. He was nice. Weeks passed in which Evie grew to like Francis, and those weeks turned into months. Between the two of them, they were never more than friends._

_Except when they were in public. Evie could swear she had seen Snow have a fit the first time he reached out and took her hand whilst they were walking through the garden._

_The first time he had kissed her knuckles, the Queen nearly fainted._

_But at night she still dreamt of Pan._

_In the end, she knew she needed a break from both of them, from the aching for Pan that she felt in her being, and the growing fear of who Francis would inevitably be to her. And she went to go and visit Starry one evening at the end of the third month Francis had been living in the castle._

_She wasn't expecting to find Killian there._

_They weren't on the best of terms. He'd shown support for the courtship of Francis from day one, along with Emma, which seemed fairly co-conspiratorial to Evie. And as such, their friendship had been strained. That being said, Evie needed comfort in that moment, and she wasn't afraid to admit it._

_"Why are you always here when I need you," she asked in astonishment as he rounded the corner, leading Sir Pellinore's horse into the stable and handing the reigns over the stable boy. _

_"You know how much I love having women needing me," Killian answered with that tone that seemed oh so common nowadays, "Who would I be to deny them my presence?"_

_"Cut the charm, Killian," she said, dropping her hand from Starry's neck and walking over to him. She meant to hug him, but the months that stood between them stopped her. And he noticed._

_"I'm still me, Princess," he grinned, but there was something hiding behind his eyes that said he wasn't telling the whole truth. And without even touching him, Evie could tell he was bursting with news, and no matter what stood between them, that news wouldn't be anywhere near good._

_"What's wrong?"_

_"Nothing –"_

_"I'm still me, Killian Jones," Evie snarked back._

_He seemed to ponder those words for a moment before sighing, looking down at his feet and murmuring._

_"My papers came back from King David this morning. The fleet leaves tomorrow."_

_Evie's face turned from confusion to shock to horror in the space on a few seconds as she watched Killian stand there in anticipation. He knew she was going to rage, but he couldn't do anything else. He had to be more than what he was – he couldn't be a squire for the rest of his life…_

_"Why would you do that, Killian?" Her voice was barely audible as she whispered to him, tears beginning to shine in her eyes. _

_"Evie, I – "_

_"No!" Evie yelled, poking her finger into his chest as she pushed him backwards angrily. "My parents died upon the sea! And you think it's just okay to shove this in their faces like that? To taunt me like this?"_

_"Not everything's about you, Evie!" _

_Wasn't it though? Aren't you just trying to prove that you can further your status Killian, just so you can get the girl? He pushed the thoughts out of his head. No, he was doing it for himself…_

_ "I can't lose you too!" _

_That shut Killian's thoughts up. And his mouth fell open in shock. He didn't even think she cared anymore. As long as she was safe, he'd told himself he didn't mind at all._

_But without a second thought, Evie ran across the hay strewn ground before throwing her arms around his waist, and clinging to him as though that would keep him there. As though by mere force, she could keep him there. Glancing up at him, she saw that he was staring down at her, torn. His hands that rested on her shoulders began to move, one tracing a line down her side to her waist and the other, tilting her head upwards as he lowered his lips to hers._

_And the minute they touched, it was like Killian had been waiting much too long. He hungered for her, for far more than a simple connection of their lips. And Evie felt it, pulling him in by his waist until their bodies were flush together, pulling and tugging at the warmth of his lips before tracing them with her tongue, slipping it into his mouth._

_His hand gripped her waist tighter, fighting her tongue with a hint of passionate anger. And of course he was angry with her. She'd left him hanging that first time when they were supposed to do this. It was almost revenge._

_His shirt was bunching in handfuls where Evie was grasping it. Her kiss was becoming more forceful, her neat tugs harsher and more fierce, almost biting at Killian's lip. And he was drifting, his lips following paths along the tanned contours of her face; along her jaw, down her neck. He groaned when her body arched into his instinctively and she moaned when he began to suck on the skin just above her collar._

_And just like that, she seized up. Letting go of Killian, she disentangled their limbs and stepped back, both of them breathing heavily._

_"Where'd you learn how to kiss like that?"_

_Killian half expected her to deny it. To say that she hadn't been kissed. But they both knew that after that intense make out session, he was far from her first kiss. Perhaps her and Francis…_

_"Killian…"_

_"It was Francis."_

_"No!" There was no lie in her eyes as they widened in shock, the thought so very far from her mind._

_Killian thought for a moment before thinking back over the past few months. Her happiness wasn't entirely faked, but it wasn't the kind that she'd felt at the beginning of the year. Here she was, courted by a Prince but still pining after her first kiss._

_With Pan._

_"It was him wasn't it," he murmured, looking away from her. "That night before your birthday; you found Pan."_

_Evie breathed in deep before nodding slowly, "I did."_

_"And do you love him?"_

_"I don't know, I think I did...I might..."_

_But that was enough for Killian to nod in defeat, and turn from her room, walking away without a single word. And by the time he came back to apologise, he was much too late._


	10. Wanting

A/N: Hey Team!

Well, this chapter went on forever. So it's unedited cause I just spent, like four hours fighting writer's block to get this out, and I really need to go and get rid of the sugar headache I've given myself.

_Queen of Dorks: Thank you so much! Your review(s) really means a lot. This is all that's keeping me sane too. =P xx_

Aight team, Pan/Evie completely this chapter. Let's get this show on the road.

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Wanting**

xxx

_**Four Years Ago**_

_"If you don't want to get married, why don't you just tell them? If they love you, they'll let you marry who you choose."_

_"Why do you let them treat you so, Evie? You're actually telling me that a tournament was held in your honour and you didn't even get acknowledged!"_

_"They honestly don't care enough to treat you of your place? Do they honestly think you such a burden that they will not ask for your opinion on such matters? They consider Emma's thoughts!"_

_Francis knew her well. Every time she heard him say something like that, she couldn't help but agree with him. And when she went to bed that night, with Killian's kiss fresh upon her lips, those words were swirling around her head. Because he was leaving her…Just like they all inevitably did…_

_And the royal family weren't exactly accommodating. Sure they were all goody goody with her now that she was showing miniscule interest in someone that they approved of…_

_She didn't want them to approve of her. She didn't want Francis. She wanted Pan. And as she clutched at one of her four pillows, she imagined that it was him; that it was him comforting her after everything._

_A soft knock came at her door and Evie resignedly got up from her bed. She was desperate to reach oblivion in her sleep to escape her thoughts, except at this ungodly hour, someone was knocking at her door._

_Opening it a crack, she saw Francis at her door and her eyes widened in surprise. Night time visits weren't on the agenda. At least, not from what she'd perceived of him._

_"Relax Princess," Felix answered, a soft smile upon his face. "I have a message for you."_

_"From…"_

_"Someone whose job is finished and would like to see you as soon as possible in a certain realm."_

_Evie's mouth dropped open in astonishment, her brown eyes glowing in excitement. "You know Pan?" she hissed._

_"Goodnight, Princess," Francis said with a mysterious grin as he waved her goodbye. She stared at his retreating back for a moment before shutting the door and running to her desk drawer. So as to not be tempted, she'd kept it away from her for the past few months._

_But now, she held it in her hand tightly, and when she opened her eyes, she was surrounded by towering trees and candlelit lanterns. Her heart beat that much faster as she slowly brought her eyes down to see the one person she wanted, standing with his arms folded at the base of his tree with a smug grin on his face._

_"Welcome back, Princess."_

_She was so fast into his arms that he barely saw her running towards him. His arms wrapped around her warmly, pulling her into his embrace fiercely. She reached up and earnestly placed her lips on his, murmuring between kisses, "Don't. Call. Me. Princess."_

_"Of course, Evie," he grinned, pulling away to brush her hair out of her face. "It's just been so long…"_

_"I missed you. So much," she held him tighter and he brushed his nose against her neck. But when he stiffened in her arms, Evie pulled back to look at him questioningly. His eyes, however, were stuck firmly upon the juncture of her neck and shoulder, narrowing in anger as his hands began to clench upon her._

_"Who touched you?" he hissed through gritted teeth, still not taking his eyes off the spot. It was then that Evie realised what Pan was staring at. And she gulped. She'd never lied to him before…could she lie to him? Was it physically possible?_

_ "No one Pan, I swear!" Evie lied through her teeth._

_"So you simply fell on your neck?" He was staring at her incredulously, wondering why she would even bother to lie to him. "Who touched you?"_

_"Does it matter, Pan? He's gone now!" She pushed herself out of his arms angrily. This wasn't how she'd expected their reunion to go. "You know what, I don't even know why I have to explain myself to you. I don't see why you had to spend three months here, leaving me to be courted by some Prince so that you could protect the island during winter."_

_"I don't think you understand the amount of power it takes to keep the lost boys safe when the frost settles in. As for you? I waited for you, didn't I?"_

_"You don't have any other girls."_

_"But you have boys so you can just take them at any time you please?" Pan was fuming now. He wasn't particularly angry that someone had touched her, more that there was a possibility she would have more options than him. And that made him desperate. _

_"No," she hissed, pushing against him, "I'm not some tavern whore, Pan. But if –"_

_"Was it Felix?"_

_"…who?"_

_"Francis," Pan corrected._

_"No!" she said in exasperation. "Why does everyone keep thinking that!"_

_"Everyone…"_

_Evie cut him off by pulling on the collar of his tunic and crushing her lips to his once more, almost angrily. "I want _you_."_

_"Don't tell me that, Evie," Pan groaned into her lips, his hands tightening once more on her hips. "If you tell me that then I'll take you to my bed and have my way with you."_

_"I want you," she repeated dangerously even. She didn't even realise what it was that she was asking. But he lifted her into his arms that same way he did when he'd first met her, and pushed off into the air, jumping in through the window and letting her stand on her feet for a second before he attacked her body once more. His hands were roaming up and down her sides, pulling and tugging at the strings of her night dress but Evie murmured breathlessly, "If you want me to take it off, just ask."_

_"Actually," Pan grunted, "I'd much prefer it if I ripped them off you, but that loses its effect if I tell you."_

_Evie shivered at the blatant lust in his eyes as he finally pulled the thin cardigan from her shoulders. She shivered, partially from cold, but also from the caresses of Pan's delicate hands across her skin. He was kissing her across her skin and her body was reacting to every touch, so much so that she wanted to feel him completely against her._

_Evie surprised even herself then. She shifted her shoulders and the thin straps of her nightdress fell from her shoulders. Pan looked up from where he was kissing her collarbone to smirk, a question in his eyes. "Evie?"_

_"So you need a written invitation or something, Pan?" she whispered, breathlessly and he dropped her dress to her waist without another moment's hesitation. Running his hand over her curves, she found herself almost bare before him._

_"You are mine, Evie," he whispered, latching his lips onto the swell of her breasts before swirling his tongue around her nipple, suckling and pinching as she arched into his mouth, heat pooling in her core. Her body burned for him as Pan pushed her back into the wall. His fingers traced lines down her bare stomach, before waiting for her to shimmy out of the rest of her clothes. Her breath heavy, Evie was shivering, never having been so naked around a man before, but she was so on edge with excitement that she let it fall after only a moment, watching as Pan's eyes darkened impossibly. _

_He dared to venture lower then, even as he stood fully clothed, she pushed herself into him. His lips and teeth pulled and teased her skin as she let out moans, "What are…what are you doing, Pan?"_

_He was skimming the edge of her panties with his fingertips and he murmured against her neck, nuzzling into the skin with a devilish grin, "Would you prefer the bed, Evie?"_

_"I can't…" she breathed, finally realising what she'd consented to when she said that she wanted him. "I can't…it's not proper…my wedding night…"_

_"There are ways around that," he answered with a mischievous grin before sweeping her into his arms and crossing the room, depositing her on the bed with a soft bounce before he crawled on top of her. He ran his hands up her thighs before hovering his body above hers, kneading at her breasts with his hands roughly, he took her lips in a searing kiss. It was a moment before Evie realised there was a dull throbbing between her legs from the dance Pan was mirroring with their tongues. She groaned, feeling him press against her intimately and he chuckled against her lips._

_His hand was suddenly there, pressing down on her through her panties and she almost yelped with the foreign feeling. But it wasn't uncomfortable…it was good…_

_Pan's finger's pushed aside the offending cloth without removing his lips from Evie's, testing the effect that he had upon her, entirely pleased as he pressed his fingers into her wet warmth. Evie gasped out a moan as she felt his intrusion, touching her in a place no one had ever felt before._

_"That feels so…good," Evie was gasping into his mouth, her breath coming in sharp pants. Fiercely, he kissed her, biting down on her lip hard enough to draw blood and she grasped at his shoulders, trying to ground herself as he brought her pleasure beyond what she had ever felt. Pushing herself onto his hand, she wordlessly begged for more. He wasn't taking things further than she wanted, but God, if he'd wanted to right now, she was pretty sure she'd let him._

_She couldn't help the shaking of her body as he brought her closer to the edge, pressing down upon her once more before she was taken over by insurmountable pleasure, clinging to Pan as he touched her lightly through her high, holding her around the waist to his body, still fully clothed as her bare body sank down, wearied._

_He held her to him for a moment as her breathing returned to normal, simply gazing down at her as she turned into a boneless mass in his arms. Lowering her completely to the bed, he places a chaste kiss upon her forehead as Evie looked up at him curiously. _

_"But…what about you…" _

_"I know what you're trying to do," Pan whispered. "You're trying to placate me by giving yourself to me."_

_"What do you mea –"_

_"I don't want it to be like this."_

_Evie stared at him in shock. And Pan could scarcely believe it himself. She was lying on his bed, the perfect image of fading innocence, and he was stopping himself. But it was too fast, it couldn't just be sex. He needed her to love him..._

_"Why are you such a gentleman?"_

_She'd felt the growing mass in his pants as he ground into her, he had to be as desperately in need as she was. But he simply gave her his usual smirk and said, "Not now, Evie. We've got all the time in the world."_

_And pulling the covers of his bed up over her, he slid in beside her. It was comfortable, leaning against Pan, but Evie, breathing heavily, found herself wishing that Pan's skin was warm upon hers. She settled with snuggling up to the pillows where he followed her, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead once more as she looked up at him wondrously._

_"You're mine," he whispered, before lying down beside her and taking her in his arms. In that way, the two of them fell asleep. And when Peter Pan woke up the next morning, like all mornings, Evie was gone._

xxx

**Present Day**

Evie was on edge throughout the next day. Killian must have warned the girls because they were walking on glass around her, careful not to push her too hard or cause any problems. If they did, they went to Killian to fix the problem, because Evie was pacing in her room, alternating between crying and throwing things and being angry with everyone and everything:

But most of all herself.

She eventually cried herself to sleep sitting against the wall which was where Killian found her when he put Ash to sleep that night. He didn't want her sleeping there, so he didn't even hesitate to sweep her into his arms and walk down the hall to her room. Tucking her into her bed, she still didn't stir, the tears that stained her face only drying to form a layer of hardness across her frowning face. Whatever she was thinking of in her sleep, it wasn't happy. He could only hope that when she awoke in the morning, she would be back to normal.

Or, as normal as she could be.

xxx

"Did you honestly think I wouldn't find you, Evie?"

Evie jolted awake at the sound of Pan's voice. He was leaning against the door on one leg, his arms folded across his chest. He was wearing his tunic, those boots…he hadn't changed. Not one day had aged his face in two entire years. He was here, in her home, standing there like he owned the place with that stupid smirk on his face as his eyes roamed her figure.

"Fuck you, Pan," she spat, her eyes darting around. How did she get to her room. She looked at the direction of the moon out her window. Shit. She'd slept past their meeting time. "How the hell did you get in here?"

"Ooh, Princess has learnt how to play," he taunted, that sparkling gleam present in his eyes as he pushed himself off the door, walking forward easily. Evie couldn't help but cower backwards towards the wall as he began to walk towards her. He sat down o the edge of her bed, entirely too close for her liking.

"Now, now, Evelyn," he whispered.. "No need to be frightened. Although, it is quite a beautiful look upon your face. Fear."

"Flattery will not get you anywhere, Pan," she answered, his words dissipating her fright and fuelling it into her anger and frustration with him that took over her entire being. Leaning forward abruptly, she noticed surprise pass over his face. Within millimetres of his façade, she breathed angrily, "Get out."

"Why? So you can continue to avoid me?" he asked quietly, taking a step forward. "So you can continue to pretend that you never fucked me –"

"You never came back for me!"Evie hissed, looking up at his stoney face with a desperate anger. "I waited for you to come and take me away from him! You had my love, did that mean nothing?! You never saved me!"

"I never told you I would."

"Maybe the 'love' part was a little too much for your tiny brain, Pan," Evie said, pushing him harshly off her bed. "But that means something!"

"I never said I loved you," he answered harshly, his green eyes narrowing. "I don't know why you expected me to. But I'm here now –"

"And I'm just supposed to, what, be happy? Be happy that you left me two years ago to get married to a man I didn't know? That you took away _any_ chance I had at happiness? Yeah. I'm happy."

"Good," Pan hissed, grabbing her arms that she tried to jerk out of his grasp. "But since you obviously can't be quiet long enough for me to get out what I need to say, I'm going to need to make you be quiet.

And Evie found herself unable to speak.

The fear set in once again. Pan's magic had been so minimal when she'd first met him that she'd assumed he only had what the pixie dust gave him. But here he was, silencing her wordlessly. Where had he gained his power?

"So, you obviously felt that, Evie," Pan said, letting go of her and taking a few steps back. "That, my love, is magic. Magic that you so foolishly gave me when you, well, gave me your love. And, you might not realise it but it's waning. Not through any of my doing of course, but for the past two years, it's been fading. And as of the last eight months, it's been decreasing exponentially."

Evie's eyes showed a question behind her fear. _What do you expect me to do about it?_

"Ah," Pan said with his smirk, "I honestly just want to catch up, Evie. I want to find out what you've been doing for the past two years. Or, more importantly, who."

_What the fuck? That's what this was about?!_

"Cause, you see, the only reason why my magic would be fading, is if you've given your love to someone else."

Evie would have laughed if she could. Her? In love with someone else? Please, the thought was ridiculous.

"And, well my dear, it may not be everything you would have wished for, but you loved me once," Pan said, leaning down to face her, his face perfectly serene. "And you will love me again." He waved his hand across Evie's face and she spoke aloud with a wide grin.

"You're insane, Pan."

"I know that, Evie," he answered as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. "But I was just as insane four years ago when you met me."

And with that, he pressed his lips to hers gently, and despite her protests, her beating hands upon his chest, her mouth moulded to his instinctively and she couldn't stop it. When he broke away, he was smiling, invigorated. As much as Evie was reluctant to admit it, they'd both felt the surge – the spark – magic.

So Pan didn't say a word as she placed her finger to her lips, horrified.

And Evie didn't murmur a goodbye as he walked out of the door.

But she didn't sleep that night – too afraid of what her dreams would bring. Him. His addictive touch…

She missed it. She missed him.

But more than that, Evie hated being left wanting.


	11. Feeling Loved

A/N: Talk about a couple of long chapters. CaptainSwan feels along with Pan/Evie in this chapter.

_Queen of Dorks: You sign in on Guest, I answer you here. =P Thank you again! xx_

Thank you for following, favouriting, reviewing and being epic! Love you guys!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Feeling Loved**

xxx

**_Three Years Ago_**

_Killian Jones was an honest sailor. Every man aboard the Jewel of the realm knew it. But not only that, he was an excellent fighter, a humble man, charismatic, and believed, beyond all else, in good form._

_Which is why, ten months after joining the King's navy, they were sailing back into Port where his Captain would bequest that Jones be promoted for his service in protecting the kingdom. They were to dine with the King and Queen that night and Killian felt a gulp of apprehension when he realised that he might be seeing…well…Evie, again._

_But, dressed in his uniform, he was to enter the palace with his Captain, preparing to formally be introduced to the King and Queen, not that they hadn't met him before…_

_Of course, the minute he stepped into the room he accidentally ran into a young woman wearing riding pants and a white shirt. Recognising immediately who she was with her flowing blond locks, Killian bowed._

_"Princess," he said reverently._

_"Welcome…shit!" Emma's mouth dropped open halfway through her curtsey when she finally realised who she was facing. "Jones!"_

_"Milady," he answered with a grin, a wink following it. Well, this was Emma. Good form didn't seem to hold much with her anyway._

_"Look at you, all sailor of the year," she teased. "Should I be calling you Lieutenant or…"_

_"You can call me anything you want Princess," he smirked before receiving an elbow in the side from his Captain who was looking at him incredulously. How dare he act so familiar with a princess!_

_"Captain Liam Johnson, Your Highness," the Captain said, sweeping into a bow._

_"As I was saying before your sailor interrupted me," Emma said with a wide smile, turning to the Captain, "Welcome! Please, I'll show you to the seating room where my parents will be along shortly. They're currently in a meeting with some foreign dignitaries, but they should be done any moment. I shall said Martha in with some refreshments."_

_When they reached the door, Liam thanked the Princess and entered, taking his place in one of the many comfortable seats, but Killian held her in the doorway._

_"Princess, may I ask where Princess Evelyn is?"_

_"I've never heard you call her Evelyn in my life," Emma said starkly. "Did they turn you into a robot on that ship?"_

_"They simply taught me mannerisms befitting of my station."_

_"It's not like you ever cared before," Emma murmured under her breath. Before looking back up at him apologetically. "She's currently visiting her fiancé's country."_

_"Fiancé…"Killian repeated, with a sigh of regret. That had been their doing._

_"She seems happier," Emma said, looking at Killian earnestly. "She doesn't speak to me as much anymore, but she smiles easier."_

_"Perhaps we did okay then," Killian said to Emma._

_"Yeah," Emma nodded, not quite sure why she didn't entirely believe it, before walking away to get the maid._

xxx

_Visiting Francis corresponded to spending a few weeks in Neverland. As soon as Evie found out Francis was Felix and had only been pretending, she was relieved, and happy to keep playing the act. And as such, Felix kept filling her head with ideas that turned her from her family and kept driving her towards Pan._

_Again and again and…_

_"That's it, Evie," Pan groaned, his hands threading through her hair as she took him into her mouth. Her tongue danced around his cock as she widened, welcoming more of his length with each shallow thrust. But grabbing a hold of his ass, she pushed him in further, and Pan didn't hesitate to thrust his entire length into her mouth, relentlessly fucking her face as she took him in over and over again._

_"I'm coming, Evie," he warned her, knowing that she didn't mind anyway, and she kept sucking until his seed poured down her throat and she swallowed it all, letting him pop of out of her mouth as Pan caught his breath. She tucked him back into his pants, retying the strings before he fell backwards_

_"Fuck, you do that amazingly now," Pan groaned, laying back on his bed._

_"You saying it wasn't good the first time?" Evie cocked her eyebrow as she climbed into the bed with him, settling into his open arms._

_"I'm just saying that it's phenomenal now," he answered with a wide grin. "You should 'go and visit Francis' more often."_

_"Oh, because you like having me here to get you off?" Evie said in astonishment._

_"No," Pan said evenly, looking directly into her insecure brown eyes, "Because I like having you here."_

_Evie didn't answer but Pan continued as his hand trailed down the side of her dress, "Besides, I'm not the only one getting off on being here."_

_"Pan…"_

_But Evie couldn't protest because within second's he'd pulled her underpants down beneath her dress and had his fingers in their place, plunging through her wetness and stirring pleasurable patterns over and around her clit. _

_Evie brought her lips up to his as he shuffled on top of her, pulling and tugging at them until they were red and swollen and she was so blissfully lost in sensations that she came apart, shaking and whispering his name breathlessly._

_"Well that's a first," Pan muttered, eyes sparkling._

_"What?" Evie breathed as he continued to touch her gently even though she was hyper aware of every single feeling. _

_"You said my name when you came," he answered with a smug smile._

_"One day I'll make you say mine," she promised, but he merely laughed._

_"In the meantime, let's see how loud I can make you say it," he replied, smirking, "When I taste you."_

_And when his head disappeared beneath her skirt, Evie couldn't help but throw her head back in ecstasy. Realising as she did, that this boy was making her feel things beyond the physical. He was making her feel wanted, he was making her feel cherished…_

_He was making her feel loved._

xxx

_The paperwork was done. Killian was promoted. The ship was setting sail that night._

_And there he was, in the stables._

_"Why would she leave you behind then, Starry," he was murmuring to Evie's horse. "She loves you, doesn't she? Should I send her correspondence then? Tell her I'm sorry?"_

_"She doesn't need to hear it."_

_Emma's voice came out of the darkness. Spinning around, Killian was struck by how much Emma had grown in the past year. Her hair had grown out, her eyes an impossibly bright shade of green. She was taller, and her body had begun to fill out those dresses…_

_Fuck, Killian. She's the Princess._

_"And why would that be, Princess?"_

_"She knows you're sorry. It took her a while, but eventually she understood. She's always been a Princess, she was never your status… and…"_

_Emma couldn't help but gaze up at Killian in that moment, his eyes piercing her with the barest hint of lust. How long had he been at sea to be looking at her in that way?_

_Emma hesitated for a moment before throwing caution to the wind, and taking the moment in her hands; quite literally._

_She threaded one hand behind his head, and reaching up on her toes, she kissed him: fiercely._

_Killian was far from the Princess's first kiss. There had been princes, knights, stable boys._

_But he was the first who held himself back._

_"Jones," she growled against his lips. "Kiss me."_

_"It wouldn't be good form," he gasped, trying to hold his arms still, refraining from wrapping them around her._

_"It wouldn't be good form to deny a Princess her wish," Emma countered, brushing her soft lips against his, "Kiss me, Lieutenant."_

_And at the use of his title, his restraint snapped and he kissed her back with all the passion she was giving him. With one hand at her waist and the other threading through her hair, he found himself pinning her to the wood of the stall, their bodies flush together as their lips attacked each other. Emma swept her tongue between his lips, battling him for the upper hand and due to his surprise, she won. With a grin she brought her hands down to the front of his shirt, bunching the material in her hands as she bit down on his lower lip._

_He growled, pulling away and looking at her in wonder, but she merely smirked. In retaliation, Killian's lips dotted kisses down her neck, daring to venture further to where her dress was pushing her breasts upwards. He kissed the swell of them feeling Emma's breath hitch above him._

_"Mark me," she whispered. Killian paused for a second, swearing that he'd heard her wrong. But when he looked up at her she repeated, "I want you to mark me. Make me yours."_

_"Princess," he breathed, longing in his voice. God, how he wanted to do that. But if anyone should see it…_

_She spun around in his arms so that her back was facing him, and pulled aside her hair, baring her ivory neck to his desire-filled gaze. Ad he didn't need any more permission than that. Latching his lips onto her skin, he felt her moan as he sucked and nipped and kissed her across any skin he could see that could easily be covered by her hair. His hands dug harshly into her waist as she ground herself onto him, most likely unintentionally, because he was growing harder with each second their bodies were so close to each other._

_"Lieutenant!"_

_The two of them sprang apart as the sound of Captain Johnson's voice echoed from the palace grounds. Emma tried to brush her hair down and made sure all her clothing was in order. Killian's hair however, was a lost cause. As were his bruised lips._

_"Next time you make Port, send me a message," Emma said breathlessly, giving him a mischievous smile. She gave him one last peck on the lips before running off back to the castle. Leaving a dishevelled Killian to run his hands through his hair and groan._

_He was in for it now._

xxx

Killian didn't question it when Evie didn't surface from her room the next morning. When he went to help the girls with breakfast, he balanced Ash on one arm and did as much as he could with his only useful hand. The girls were all busy discussing the next day, Saturday, and their outing. And that was when Killian decided to go and check on Evie.

Her eyes were lined with shadows and she was far from looking healthy.

"Did you sleep at all last night?" Killian enquired. Ash was wriggling annoyingly in his arms, trying to reach out for Evie, but Evie was simply sitting on her bed, staring out the window vacantly as she tried to rid herself of every word Pan had left her with last night.

"Ash wants you."

"She needs a nap at 12," Evie murmured distractedly. "You need to feed her before then."

"She's already had breakfast," Killian said, as his brow creased in worry. He took a few more steps into the room. "Evie, what's wrong? The girls want to see you."

"Tell them I'm sick," Evie answered monotonously.

"That excuse won't hold forever, Evie."

"Won't it?" she asked harshly, spinning round to face him. Her eyes were cold, her body language hardened. "Maybe I am. Maybe I am sick."

"Evie what are you –"

"I was worried about Pan for a reason, Killian," she said spitefully. "He's back."

Those words settled in and Killian opened his mouth in shock. "What do you mean he's…was this him? Did he hurt you?! Did he…"

He didn't want to say the words aloud, afraid to make them true. But Evie merely shook her head negatively in disgust. She'd wanted it. She'd wanted him. She was sick.

Ash chose that moment to cry out for attention and Killian tried to comfort her even though she obviously wanted Evie. But Evie didn't even seem to notice Ash's crying and left it to Killian to keep her calm. She holed up in her room for the rest of the day. And she didn't come out.

xxx

"So, your girls are quite accommodating."

Evie's eyes found Pan's as he leant in her doorway.

"Gave them your name and they let me right on in," Pan continued.

"If you hurt them Pan, I'll…"

"You'll what? Sit here and mope?" He came into her room then, and sat down on the bed across from her. He reached out his hand and traced it down her face. Evie didn't even move. If she had, she wouldn't have flinched, she would've bent into his touch.

"Evie," he murmured. "Why are you fighting me?"

"I'm not. You're making this a war," she murmured, "With your plans to fight Snow and David; your lost boys gradually filling up the inn. Don't think I didn't notice. There's a reason why we're right here. We're ready to fight you because you started this all when you found those fucking stars."

"Oh no, Evie," he answered, leaning over, his breath warm upon her face, "I think you'll find that you started this when you asked me to kiss you on your fourteenth birthday."

"I was an idiot."

"That you were," he said, nuzzling her nose, "But you were my idiot."

Evie didn't know what to say to that. It was true.

"And now you're here, trying to play mother to these lost girls. You're becoming like me, Evie."

And that made her push him away. Not in horror at what he'd said, but that it had been true. She was – she was becoming like him…

"No," she said adamantly. "I love my girls. I am nothing like you."

"Oh, so that's where your love has gone." And Peter was smiling devilishly. It was then that Evie realised what a horrific mistake she had made. No. Oh God no.

"No, Pan, I swear, I'll do anything just…please don't….don't hurt them!" She reached out for his arm, begging desperately. She'd never begged like this in her life! Well, perhaps on her wedding day when she'd been forced down that aisle, but this was for something far greater than herself. This was for her lost girls.

"Love me again, Evie," he said, pulling her in by the arm that was on his. He wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her into his lap. "I want you to love me again."

"Anything," she said wide eyed. At least this time she knew what she was getting into. He left her with a time then, and Evie spent all day awaiting the moment, equal amounts of dread and anticipation swirling within her.

It was impossible to forget his touch.

It was impossible to forget how he'd left her.

Everyone was asleep when she snuck out that night, treading lightly across the cobblestoned road until she opened the front door of the inn. Treading with tentative steps, she made her way past the occupied rooms to the furthest corner where Pan's room lay.

Evelyn knew that at all times, this room was left unoccupied. She'd even ushered Hook in here sometimes when their stronghold was too full. The lost ones left the innkeeper's room for Pan. Only, Pan had never visited the Enchanted Forest to stay.

Until now.

"Welcome, my love," he whispered when she pushed the door open. "I knew you'd come."

The dark room was lit by a sudden click of his fingers; a fire sparking in the dead fire place. She saw the spark reflected in his shining eyes before he removed himself from his bed and began to close in on her, trapping her against the wooden wall, closing the door behind her and twisting the lock.

"Did you really think you could go on like this forever?" Pan murmured, his lips mere inches away from her. "Pretending that you're helping them...Just because…you're lonely"

"You think like that because it's what _you_ do, Pan," Evelyn breathed back, trying to avoid looking at the closeness of his lips. "I for one, actually care about my girls."

"Oh I know that," he continued, his breath tracing over her skin as he touched his lips to her jaw, then her neck, then the shell of her ear – shivers running throughout her body. "But you're sure you don't want someone to hold you in the night, when it's cold and you're alone, and you're shivering and tired and sick of trying to play mother."

"No," she whispered, fearfully. Yes. Yes she did. "I don't want that."

"You don't want someone to love you?" he whispered, his eyes searching out hers.

"Do you even know how to love?"

A gaze that looked almost like hurt crossed his face. But then it was gone, because the next minute, he had her spun around until she felt herself pressed against the door, his chest leaning in on her as he kissed along her shoulder. But he didn't bother to undress her, merely pulling up her long skirts until they were hoisted around her waist. She heard the sound of him pulling down his pants and felt his hard length brush against her teasingly.

But the next second she felt the invasion of his fingers, sweeping along her wetness and hissing. "Does it really turn you on this much Evie? Just imagining the way that I used to fuck you."

"Shut up," she groaned, even though his words send a flood of heat down to her core. She just wanted him in her, to feel the pleasure, maybe then she could ignore the constant ache that his presence left her with.

"Oh, so you do want me?" She could feel his smirk, and in turn, rubbed her hips back against his length, hearing him hiss. Apparently just as annoyed as she was, he grasped her hips tightly through the numerous layers and finally slid himself entirely inside her.

Evie would never admit that the reason she didn't sleep with anybody else was because nobody gave her the satisfaction that Pan did. But she was constantly reminded with each thrust. She wasn't even fazed by the fact that they were leaning up against the door, pushing it with each harsh movement that Pan pressed into her.

She was moaning and he was grunting but other than the sound of skin slapping and the fire crackling, the room was silent. No words wore uttered and no names were called out because the moment Pan felt himself getting close, he pressed his finger to Evelyn's clit, swirling a few times before he felt her clenching around him, her forehead leaning against the wooden door as she panted out her release. Relentlessly, he pounded into her a few more times before coming apart within her and stilling against her body.

Pulling out, he let her skirts fall back to the floor as he redid his pants. Turning around, hot and flushed, Evelyn stared at him.

"So that's it then?" she gulped, looking him up and down.

"Well if you want…" Pan gestured towards the bed.

"No, I can't…I have to get back…"

"I need to know that you love me, Evie," Pan whispered, brushing his lips over her. "Please tell me…"

"I can't," Evie whispered. She couldn't admit it to herself, let alone to him.

"Well…perhaps, if you find that little bed a little too lonesome…"

He was kissing her then, his lips hot and fierce, but then he pulled away and was gone, lying upon his bed as though nothing had just happened.

"I'll be waiting for you, Evie."

But Evie was out the door quickly, running back to her hideout that was no longer so hidden. When she changed out of her clothes and laid down upon her bed, she was shaking. She loved him. Through everything; after everything – she still loved him.

She curled in upon herself, realising as she did, that her bed was unsettlingly cold.


	12. Serentai

A/N: Oh God. Spike fighting off demons with baby in hand? Just had massive Charming feels as I finished rewatching Angel.

Anyway, howdy team!

Like, first time scenes are the most awkward things to write, ever.

And I've now written two of them.

-.-

Did you know there was once a time when I wrote fics that weren't at all smutty and contained literally no sexual references? Hehe. Good times...

And I've just realised I am seriously bad at talking to people #selfconfidenceissuesthatIlegitlyamforcingmyselftogetover. And I've realised that when I'm really nervous it's near impossible for me to write. I needed to order some piano books and I didn't want to call and so it took me way too long to write this. Then after I did it, cause the guy was really nice on the phone, I was just like. BAM! Chapter done.

But anyway, this chapter is ginourmous. Even without this long ass Author's Note. And for some of you it may not be your cup of tea, but LieutenantDuckling for a fair bit of it. Just, once you hit the _2 Years and 2 Months Ago_ part, it's pretty much feeding my inner CaptainSwan.

But thank you as always to you guys! For following, favouriting, reviewing and being epic. Cookies all round!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Serentai**

When Evie awoke early the next morning, there were a pile of girls standing in her doorway. None were jumping on her because they were worried she was still sick, but surprisingly, the sun was out today, and despite feeling a little sore, Evie actually felt okay. Or at least, better than she had for the past couple of days.

She swung herself off the bed and the girls' faces all broke into smiles.

"Alright girls, get dressed. We're going to Serentai."

xxx

**_2 Years and 3 months ago._**

_"Guards! Seize him!"_

_Felix's arms were taken by two guards and he was dragged in surprise into the throne room, Evie protesting as she ran after them. But Snow and David were livid, their eyes fiery. Felix was deposited at the foot of their thrones and Snow and David stood before him; staring him down._

_"Evie…" Snow was saying, walking over to her with her eyes staring at her pitifully. "Did you know?"_

_"I…I swear I…"_

_"Please, Your Highness. Do not punish the Princess. This was my fault."_

_"That it most certainly was," David said, staring Felix down. "Who are you then? An assassin? A spy?"_

_"Neither, Your Majesty," Felix answered. "I merely wanted to make Princess Evie happy."_

_"You did," King David answered. "But we cannot welcome an imposter into our family. We will spare your life, but you are banished from our kingdom."_

_"But Your Highness –"_

_"I am your king, Evelyn," he said, turning to her, not angry, but firm. "And this boy will not marry you."_

_"Then I will not marry anyone!" Evie cried out, walking from the room. But before she got to the door, Felix had pushed his way past the guards and was lurching at Evie. Perhaps the king and queen thought he was attacking her, but he simply reached for the star around her neck and tugged it sharply, the clasp of her necklace breaking apart as he took the charm in his hand._

_His face was apologetic in that moment before he disappeared._

_Evie cried out in frustration and shock. How dare he! He just took away any chance she had at escape! Snow tried to reach for her, still astounded by what had just happened, but Evie was crumpling to the floor in the doorway. Broken. That star was the only way she could get to Pan…_

_"Evie…"_

_"Get off me!" she cried, pushing Snow away. "You're evil! Both of you! How dare you force me to do this! How dare you! How dare they!"_

_Everyone present in that room knew that she was yelling at her own parents, long gone though they were. She was sick of that decree they'd issued – that promise that Evie must be married by her sixteenth birthday. She stood up angrily and exited the room without a word. _

_"Prince Fiyori," Evie heard Snow mention as she ran from the room. "He'll be kind to her."_

_"Just make sure he's actually a Prince this time, Snow."_

xxx

**Present Day**

"So, you're out and about?"

"Don't look at me like that, Killian," Evie said as they walked along the street. They'd hopped off the ferry and were now venturing into Serentai through the markets. The girls were stopping at various stalls, armed with a few gold coins from Killian's seemingly endless coffers.

"I just thought…"

"They need this. I'm here for them."

"Oh," Killian's face fell. "I thought it might have been a show of defiance. I reckon it would do him good, you know. To show him that you're not his."

That wouldn't be such a bad idea, Evie thought sadly. If only she wasn't protecting all the girls around them. She was making sure to keep a count of everyone in her sights.

"We can leave them for a while, you know," Killian suggested as they strolled through the markets. "Sarah's got a good hold on Ash, and Alessia and Flora are quite capable of manning the fort."

"But what about Tara and Kala!" Evie protested. "They need me to look after them! I can't just abandon them!"

"Whoa, love," Killian said, trying to calm her down. "You've been out of it for two days and they've made some friends. They're settled in fine, and you really need a drink. You're tense in all sorts of places."

"And how would you know that," Evie frowned, still unsure.

"Because I know you," he smirked back. "I could always ease the tension with a nice massage."

"One handed?" she asked doubtfully. "In your dreams, Hook."

"Sadly, yes," he sighed before steering her towards the closest tavern. He paused to pass on the message to Sarah, Alessia and Flora that they were having a respite and they nodded in understanding before Killian pushed Evie into the establishment and they took seats at a corner in the back table. The minute someone walked past, Killian called out.

"Lass! My friend and I would like a bottle of rum."

"For old times' sake?" Evie grinned reluctantly. It was almost four years ago when he'd snuck her out of the castle for that drink.

"For old times' sake," he answered as the girl he had summoned spun around, a little tensely. The girl's blonde curls swung with her. Killian firstly was surprised by the soft beauty of her before he realised exactly who he was looking at.

"Oh lookie here," Killian said with a wide smirk. "Little Miss Perfect is out wandering the town. Even dressing the part. If I hadn't known any better I'd have thought you were a tavern wench…Emma."

"Killian?!" her eyes widened in shock before they drifted to the girl beside him. "Evie!"

"Emma!" Evie's mouth dropped open in shock. The pieces didn't add up. Why was Emma here? Quite plainly…working…

She put the tray down as they all took in each other's appearances. Killian was grinning like it was all some big joke. Evie was uncomfortable and Emma, quite frankly, was just happy to see them.

"So, the king and queen finally kicked you out then," Killian smirked.

"Yes, well, when they found out I was unmarriageable…" Emma rolled her eyes. "I ran away for my own protection. They were going to keep me holed up there like a prisoner for the next five years because some attack is brewing or some shit like that."

"And you just so happen to be here?" Killian said with a wide grin. It was curious, Evie had never seen him so happy. And he was, he honestly looked like all his Christmases had come at once. "I have to admit. When they said you'd gone missing eight months ago, I was worried."

He'd known Emma had gone missing and _he hadn't told her?!_

"There was the assumption between my parents that I'd eloped. But of course, they couldn't think of anyone with whom it could be," Emma grinned. Evie felt completely out of it at that point, but things started to add up when she heard that.

"You two? No…" Her mouth fell open in shock once more. Emma grinned sheepishly and Killian perked his eyebrow suggestively.

"Well," Evie said, slipping off her chair awkwardly, "I'm going to let you two catch up whilst I do some collective birthday shopping."

"Don't blow all my savings!"

"Please, Hook," Evie laughed, "They're unlimited."

xxx

**_2 Years and 2 Months Ago_**

_"Princess!"_

_"What the –" Emma looked up at him in horror. "Do you _want_ to get caught?" she hissed. "My ass is on the line here!"_

_"I didn't send you the message," he said, walking off the gangplank. "What are you doing here?"_

_"I saw the Jewel of the Realm from my window."_

_"And you've been staring out your window for ten months straight?"_

_"It was a long ten months…" she trailed off with a sigh as she waited for Killian to come and meet her where she was leaning against the cabin. "Was it as long for you?"_

_"It felt like longer," he admitted, closing the space between them. He ran his fingers through her hair delicately before skimming his roughened hands along her cheek. "I missed you."_

_"And of course you know I didn't miss you," Emma said with a wide grin. In the darkness however, Killian missed her grin and the words sent a shiver of fear through him. She didn't miss him…_

_"Killian, what's the matter?" Emma frowned as she felt his hand shy away from her face._

_"Nothing, I just thought…"_

_"You think too much," she said, running her hands up his shirt. It was warm and so the outer layers of his uniform had been left upon his ship. "Now it's time for your welcome home present."_

_She pulled him forward and placed her lips gently on his. At first he was hesitant, but as he threaded a hand through her hair and the other around her waist, she brought herself closer, bending into him and kissing him with all she had. Ten months was definitely much too long._

_"God, I missed you," Emma murmured into his lips._

_"So, you did miss me?" Killian growled._

_"Didn't I just say that?" she raised her eyebrow as he pulled away to look at her, before he began to devour her lips once again. _

_When he finally pulled away, it was to lay his forehead upon hers and whisper, "Happy Birthday Princess."_

_"Something for my birthday, Jones?" she asked, looking up into his blue eyes. "I've know I've asked you before, but please, call me Emma."_

xxx

_Dinner the next evening was fairly uneventful. Except for the way that Killian and Emma had conveniently been placed side by side. And between courses his hand kept dipping below the table, tracing patterns on her knee._

_Numerous times, Emma had to stop herself from laughing, earning looks from the Captain and her parents. Killian's, of course, was simply giving her a knowing smirk. He knew exactly where she was ticklish now…_

_Dinner ended on a high note, with their chef's brilliant chocolate pudding. Emma made dead certain to accidentally leave some sauce on her lips and have to lick it from her lips, purposefully eyeing Killian whilst her parents were distracted. Killian felt his pants tightening with the simple motion._

_He leant over then, knowing they probably needed to stop before things got any further. Only, what he whispered in her ear wasn't exactly deterring. "Did you turn sixteen and suddenly become the greatest tease known to man?"_

_Smirking, she turned her head around so that it would merely seem as though they were whispering to each other, her hair shrouding the view of her teeth that were nibbling on his earlobe, "Can't handle it, Jones?"_

_His restraint was sorely being tested by the Princess in the seat beside him._

_But then Captain Johnson distinctly changed the tone of their conversation by enquiring about Princess Evelyn's wedding day._

_"Two months tomorrow," Emma answered, a touch of bitterness in her words. Two months tomorrow, Evie would be married to Prince Fiyori. A man of few words with wandering hands._

_"Of course you are invited, should you make Port then."_

_"I believe we are scheduled to be in a foreign Kingdom._

_Emma wished she were too. She didn't want to watch her friend face that. But at the same time, she didn't want to leave her alone._

_"Where is she now?" Killian murmured in Emma's ear._

_"In his kingdom. Trying to like his parents. Which is an impossible feat."_

_"Emma!" _

_"Pardon me mother," Emma said, without the faintest blush. "Perhaps I've had too much wine. If you'll excuse me, I might retire."_

_Her mother was absolutely speechless, but still all the men rose as Emma did, and King David said, "Perhaps we should also retire to the seating room to discuss the plans for your next trip, Captain."_

_"I shall escort the Princess to her room and be there shortly, Captain."_

_None of the adults blinked at Killian's apparent show of good form. He held his arm out and Emma took it dutifully, parading up the stairs together making polite small talk. Of course, as soon as they were in the corridor of her room, and he knew no one was around, he was pinning her to the wall and Emma was gratefully moaning into his mouth as he clutched at her waist tightly._

_"You could lead a sailor to his doom, love," he groaned as his lips kissed down her neck. _

_"Actually, I thought I was leading you to my room," Emma whispered, her green eyes shining._

_"Careful, Princess," Killian smirked, pulling away from her as she gave a sigh of disappointment. "I wouldn't want to besmirch your honour."_

_"Well maybe my honour wants to be besmirched," Emma muttered, purposefully not low enough so that Killian wouldn't hear. God, she really was not helping him keep his head._

_"Where's your room, Jones?" Emma asked casually as they arrived at her door._

_"You'll not get that out of me, Princess," he said with a knowing smirk. _

_"You could always come in here," Emma said, pressed against the doorway._

_"I could," Killian answered. "Except I have some plans to go over and should I be found here, I'm not sure things will bode well for either of us."_

_"Fine then," Emma said, her face falling. "Will you say goodnight?"_

_"Not now, Princess," he replied, not knowing why continued with, "My room's on this floor, I'll be back later."_

_And her face lit up in a mischievous smile._

_It was three hours later, long past everyone going to bed, that she heard the quiet knock on her door. Emma jumped up from the bed and was pulling open her door within seconds._

_"I came to bid you goodnight Princess," Killian muttered lowly, taking a step in towards her before placing a gentle kiss on her lips and pulling away but she kept her hand on his and he saw that she hadn't changed into her night clothes as yet. "Did you stay up waiting for me?"_

_"I didn't have much else to do. Besides, my lady's maid is on holidays and this corset _is_ awfully hard to get off on my own."_

_Killian swallowed. She was trying to kill him._

_"Come in," she offered once more._

_ "Princess," he muttered lowly, staring at her lustfully. "If I come in there…I might not be able to stop myself from doing some…less than appropriate things with you."_

_"Screw propriety, Killian," she said quickly. He started. She'd never called him by his first name! It was always Lieutenant or Jones…_

_And then his lips were on hers, harsh and demanding, nothing like the innocent kiss he'd given her a few moments ago. She'd sensed it, the hidden dangers that lurked beneath his gentleness, and as he pushed her into her room and she shut the door, he pressed her up against it with a force that she cherished. He didn't treat her like she was about to be broken. _

_"Have you ever been with a man, Princess?"_

_Emma couldn't help the laugh that escaped her lips, "Because I've met _so_ many men in my life. And they were princes and knights anyway. They're too –"_

_"You'd be surprised how many princes are very skilled on their wedding nights, Princess." He was whispering into her skin on her collarbone, placing feather light kisses as he walked with her to the edge of the bed. "I'll ask again…"_

_Emma whimpered as he sucked on a place beneath her ear and she fell onto the mattress, his body following swiftly. His hands were running up her legs, fiery touches as he pushed past her knees to her thighs. "No," she barely whispered. Killian stilled atop her, before letting out a sigh of regret and pulling away. Her eyes went wide as she sat up in front of him. Undoubtedly, she looked an absolute mess, with her hair coming loose from her blonde braid and her skirt pushing her mid thigh where Killian had been running his hands._

_And her face hardened in hurt, but not only that, it became resolute and fierce._

_"So you're just going to leave me like this?" she hissed. "What, you aren't _up_ to the job?"_

_"Emma," he growled, purposely not looking at her. "I'm trying to be a gentleman."_

_She crawled over to him at that point, and none too gently, pulled his head around to face her, pulling his lips to hers in a death defying kiss. Biting down on his lower lip, she took his surprise as an opportunity to push him down onto his back and climb atop him, straddling his waist as he stared up at her in shock._

_"We both know you've never been a gentleman, Jones," Emma answered before pulling her dress over her head and watching Killian's eyes widen at her forwardness. It was only for a moment before his surety returned._

_"Well, well, Princess," he said, "If I'd known you were so eager I would've taken you long before this."_

_"Shut up," she hissed, leaning down and taking his lips in hers to stop him from talking as she worked at the clasps of her corset. She was working from the top and Killian from the bottom, their hands meeting in the centre. Emma pulled away from Killian as she pushed the corset away from her and took in a breath of air before sliding her thin straps from her shoulder and letting her under dress fall to her waist. Killian's sharp intake of breath made her smirk, and she pulled the dress over her head, leaving her only in her panties._

_Emma thought Killian would be hyperventilating by then, but when his fingers touched her hip, their breathing seemed to switch. Leaning down on him, she felt his hands wandering up her skin, tracing lines up her spine before lightly skimming the underside of her breast._

_"I just undressed myself for you, Jones," Emma murmured into his lips. "Take all the liberties with me that you want."_

_"I don't know," he whispered back with a smirk plastered on his face. "I quite like you right where you are."_

_Emma chose that moment to roll her hips over the hard bulge in his breeches and give him a satisfied smirk with the way his hand tightened on her breast and his voice let out a low, "Fuck."_

_"Language, lieutenant!" Emma said, mocking shock. "What would your captain say?"_

_"Probably the exact same thing Milady," Killian grinned. "But I don't intend to let him anywhere near you."_

_"Oh?"_

_"You're right. I do want to take liberties with you."_

_With that, she was on her back against her pillows, Killian hovering over her as he pressed himself on every inch of her that he could find. His lips touched her burning skin, his teeth grazing and biting as his tongue traced patterns over her. Taking a nipple into his mouth, she arched into his body, a wanton moan leaving her mouth. He grunted his approval, letting his hands wander lower._

_She let out a gasp when she felt him touch her through her panties, the pleasure of finally having some relief more than she could bear. God, if the barest touch was doing this…_

_"Please Killian," she groaned as he pulled his hand away. "Please…"_

_He was back to kissing her neck, up to her ear where he whispered, "The first time you come apart, I want it to be with me inside of you, touching you and filling you with all I have to offer."_

_She couldn't offer him any more than a buck of her hips as she sought more relief. Killian chuckled before moving to pull his shirt over his head and throw it to the ground. But before he had a chance to put his hands on his breeches ties, Emma was already there, the ties undone and pushing them down over his hard length. He watched her eyes widen as she caught sight of him and she swallowed, quite plainly a little intimidated._

_"That's meant to go…"_

_He pulled her forward then, his hand threading in her hair as she kissed her softly, "I'll be gentle, Princess."_

_"Emma," she corrected, feeling relieved by the tenderness of him. He delicately pulled her panties down her legs until they were lying with the rest of their clothes. He then kissed his way up her naked body, planting himself back at her lips as his fingers traced over her wetness._

_Being the first time anybody had ever touched her there, Emma shivered in pleasure. "How can it hurt when it feels this good?" she breathed as he rolled his fingers over her clit. Killian sighed for a moment before saying, "I'm going to take you now Emma, if you'll let me."_

_"God, yes," she groaned, shifting against his hand. She felt him nudging at her with his cock, and slowly stretching her. A discomfort settled into her. And then the pain hit._

_"Ah!" She used her own hand to bite down on as she tried to cut off her scream, but Killian's fingers were back on her then, combating the pain with pleasure. He kissed her, trying to stop the pain. And he didn't shift for a while, until Emma felt the pain fade into a dull ache._

_"Okay. I'm okay," she murmured into his lips. And he moved, just barely, giving her the friction she needed to groan. Eventually, all thoughts of pain faded as she felt pleasure building in the pit of her stomach. He was sliding into her pleasurably and all conscious thought seems lost on her as she strained for something elusive. "What…"_

_"Come for me, love," he murmured, his forehead on hers. "Come for me."_

_"I…ah, Killian…" she shuddered as her orgasm gripped her. Her hand gripped his arms to support herself, and he stilled, thinking it might be too much for her. She looked up at him in awe. "That was amazing…I don't know how I ever…" He leant down and kissed her once more before he began to move again, feeling her walls surrounding him. He let out a groan as she began to meet him with each thrust._

_"Fuck, Emma, you're so tight."_

_Emma didn't know as much as he did, but judging by the way he was stretching her so deliciously, she could guess. And God, his words just turned her on that much more._

_She was clutching hard at the muscles of Killian's back as he thrusted into her, his breath coming out in warm pants upon her face as she held onto him with all her strength, giving leverage against his movements as he filled her over and over._

_Every time she moaned, she would dig a little deeper and his thrusts would get a little sharper, his hands wandering further, his lips attaching to the skin of her flesh with a suction that had her bending into his every will._

_She came once more, fluttering around him with high pitched moans. And when he came it was with a guttural groan, "Emma," he whispered as he emptied himself into her, slowing as he finally sank down into the mattress with her. "Emma."_

_She placed a soft kiss on his chest before cuddling into him, completely sated and completely happy._

_"Thank you Killian," Emma murmured._

_"You're very welcome, Princess," he answered, holding her in his arms as he pulled the blanket over the two of them. Both of them knew he couldn't stay til morning, lest he be caught. But he could stay for now._

_And stay he did._


	13. Given

A/N: HEY HEY!

Got home - busted out two chapters in three hours. Feeling like I'm floating right now. (So what if some of it was copying and pasting...)

All in the past, but Pan/Evie and some important revelations.

Anywho, love you guys!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Given**

xxx

**_Ten Years Ago_**

_"Do you know why the stars shine like that, Evie?" her mother whispered, looking at her daughter whose eyes were shining with the amount of stars in the sky. The six year old girl innocently shook her head._

_"It's because they gave away their love," her mother answered. "They were once like us. Like you and me. But when the stars gave away their love, other people took away that power. And they were never whole again."_

_"But Mama! What happened to them?! They're all still there!"_

_"They grew old, and could not fathom what it was to have once held that glow. And so, a kind witch once gave them the choice. They could live, and breathe as an empty shell. Or they could have that glow returned to them, and live above the earthline as magical entities giving light through the darkness."_

_"So…when a star falls?"_

_"When a star falls, it falls as it should. Powerful. But it is said they carry magic because no matter what, they are always trying to find their way home…"_

_"Like the one on your necklace Mama?"_

_"You've been spying, Evie," her mother was grinning. "But yes."_

_"Does that mean you're trying to find your way home?"_

_"Always, Evie," her mother answered, taking her in her arms. "But my home is with you. And one day you'll find yours too. But remember, never be as foolish as those stars. Never give away your love."_

_"I promise, Mama. I promise."_

xxx

**_Two Years Ago_**

_"Get out, Emma."_

_Evie was lying on her bed, staring up at the roof of her canopy with hazy eyes. Seconds passed as the countdown in her head zoomed towards zero. Emma had just slipped into her room with wide eyes, searching for something to say to her friend who had slipped so far away from her._

_"Evie, I –"_

_"Are you here with a sleeping curse?" Evie asked, turning to her, her eyes almost black with guarded rage. "No? Then get out."_

_"Evie! You have to stop this!"_

_"Hehe," Evie laughed without humour. "_I_ have to stop this? I've been trying to stop this for years, Emma. Look where it's gotten me. Tomorrow, I'll be marrying that arse. I'll share his bed and play princess and give him children until it becomes time for me to be his beautiful queen and then I'll live out my days in a draughty old castle until I die."_

_"Evie…"_

_"It's my name," Evie answered, sitting up suddenly, "Soon you'll have no reason to say it. After I'm…gone…"_

_It was then that Evie stopped counting. What was the point anyway. It was going to happen and there was no stopping it._

_"I wish you'd had more time," Emma whispered, taking hesitant steps towards Evie's cowering figure. "I wish we'd had more time. Maybe we could have…"_

_"Maybe a lot of things would be different, Emma."_

_Maybe she'd have run away that night two years ago. Run away with Pan and chosen never to come back. Maybe she'd have stayed with Killian, fallen in love with him and begged him never to join the navy. Maybe she'd be free to marry whoever she wanted._

_But when Emma could see she was going to get no more out of her sister, she left her with a single longing gaze. But just as she was about to close the door, Evie whispered, "I love you, Emma. No matter what, you'll always be my sister."_

_"Love you too, Evie."_

_And the door snapped shut._

_Evie stood up to stretch, taking a quick round of her room. Despite it being the last time she would ever be alone in her bed, she didn't want to sleep. She didn't want the nightmares that kept coming because of what her wedding day would bring._

_"Princess." A voice came from behind her, and Evie spun round in pure relief, bolting across the room and jumping on Pan, pushing him down onto the bed as she did so. Her lips found his in joyous relief, pressing kisses all over his face before returning to his lips._

_"You came for me!" she whispered. "When Felix took my necklace…I…"_

_"I'm sorry, Evie," Pan said, brushing the hair from her face. "I didn't mean to leave you but I –"_

_She kissed him again, shutting him up. "I don't even care."_

_Pan reached his hands out and clasped the star around her neck, tracing a line of kisses down her skin as he did so. Evie hissed and as she looked down at him, she saw the fire in his eyes. Pressing both their hands to the star, they finally found themselves transported exactly where they needed to be._

_Pan's bed._

_He wormed his way out from under her and began to walk around the room, giving the room it's illumination. The warm glow of candlelight shone about the room as Evie lay down upon the bed. Pan's tree house was filled with warmth ignited by the blazing heat in his gaze and the rapid thumping of Evie's anxious heart. But it wasn't in fear, no, never in fear. This was anticipation. For tonight, this night she knew, was her last in Neverland._

_With her shoes kicked to the floor and her hair coming apart from her braid, Pan watched her, walking across the room with a predatory glint in his green eyes. _

_"We…" Evie trailed off. "We're really doing this?"_

_"Tomorrow will be too late, Evie," Pan answered as he crawled onto the mattress with her. "Tomorrow, you'll be married off. And you'll be an adult."_

_"So you intend to ruin me before my husband gets to."_

_"Yes," Pan answered huskily, crawling towards her like she was his prey. "I fully intend to ruin you. I'm going to touch you until you burn for no one but me. Your body will know how desperate you were to have me and how good you'll feel with me buried inside you that you will never desire another. I'm going to mark you. I'm going to ruin you."_

_He glanced at her with piercing green eyes before smirking, "Consider it my parting gift."_

_"You're doing this…so that I'll only want you?"_

_"Oh no." Pan was on her now, sitting between her open legs and reaching for her neck. His breath was warm on her face as his fingers traced her soft skin. "We're doing this, because I want you to know, in your very being, in your very soul – that you love only me."_

_But there was nothing said of Pan's feelings as he pressed his lips firmly to Evie's, feeing her arch into him wantonly. It had been years that Pan had toyed with her, surmounting in this night. This one night where all foreplay would end, and he would finally sate his hunger. So as he pulled her white shift up her legs and over her head, she looked at him with a fire in her eyes, the heat of their bodies fusing into electricity. Pan traced his fingers over her bare skin, brushing over her nipples, her stomach, and finally lower to where her core was throbbing for him._

_"No," Evie murmured, trying to pull his hand away from her centre, moaning breathily, "We've done that before. I want more."_

_"My, my Evelyn," he smirked, kissing along her bare stomach. "You're very eager to have me take you, aren't you?"_

_His words and touches had her moaning, and her body was moving desperately against his, hips crushing upwards while hands sought to remove him of his clothing. All hints of laughter gone from his face, Pan looked down at her with desire._

_"Please Pan," she murmured, grasping at his arms as he leaned down to kiss her passionately, his teeth tugging at her lips as he pushed himself into her slowly, feeling her tense underneath him. He brushed her brown curls from her face that was clenched in pain but couldn't help but think that she was beautiful. "More," she finally hissed._

_Pan pulled himself out of Evie before pushing back in again, this time with more force, building up a rhythm until her moans were no longer of pain, but pleasure, however similar the two were to the young man. Gripping her hip, tightly, he used it as leverage to push harshly into her, eagerly seeking out his own release._

_"Tell me that you love me, Evie," Pan ordered huskily as he felt his orgasm approaching, gripping her tightly as he bit down on the flesh of her shoulder, her yelp spurring him onwards. "Tell me."_

_"I love you," she breathed as she felt herself coming apart beneath him, dragging him along with her as he let out a guttural groan, finally collapsing atop him._

_"You bastard," she finished finally, realising what he'd made her do. She pushed him off her body, staring up at the ceiling in horror. Her heart was calming down, only for her to be filled with an emptiness that she couldn't explain. Or at least, an emptiness that she didn't want to explain._

_Turning aside from Pan, she grabbed at her dress as the dread filled her. Sitting on the edge, she felt him coming over to her, pressing cold kisses against her neck as he pushed her hair aside. "Thank you for that, Evie."_

_"Your heart feeling okay, Pan?" Evie asked, her voice inconceivably weak. "Now that you've taken away my love."_

_"Ah, but you gave it willingly, my dear," he answered, whispering upon her ear. "You _gave_ me your love. And now you'll always be mine."_

_Evie melted into his whispering touches, his featherlight kisses that had her moaning once again. He spun her around and brought her back to him, but she was trying to fight him off, only her body was betraying her._

_"Have you known? This entire time. Have you known what I was?!"_

_"Descended from the stars?" Pan asked feeling a renewed energy flowing through him, "Yes. But I knew you didn't."_

_"So you played me."_

_"No, I didn't!" Pan commented, affronted. Why it hurt him that she would assume the truth, he would never know. He had played her. Every part of her. "I just…I knew that you had to be here for us to find the stars. We could only see them when you were here. And then you kept coming back and I missed you and…"_

_Evie was kissing him. "I don't know what kind of demon you are Pan," she murmured angrily against his lips. "But if you care at all. Make this night memorable." She had to ignore the emptiness. She had to fill it with something._

_"Of course, Princess."_

_And after intense, angrily passionate sex, Evie dropped, tired and sore all over, onto the pillows. She didn't snuggle up to Pan, but she turned over, drifting quickly into sleep. _

_Pan watched her, her figure rising and falling in the moonlight, with a puzzled expression. Why had he said those things? Been so adamant that she actually see something good in him. That wasn't him. He wasn't the good guy. He wasn't the kind to care – _

_Her love._

_Her love wasn't only giving him power, the kind that could fuel his magic and youth for eternity, but it was giving him…feelings…_

_Feelings that he didn't want._

_And as he looked at her, he tried his hardest to let his face harden, but he couldn't. And he knew she couldn't stay. She was here, looking for an escape. She probably even expected him to keep her._

_"Goodbye, Evie," he murmured, with almost the barest tinge of regret before pulling her hand up to her necklace._

_And where Evie had been, was cold air and empty space with the barest rumpling of sheets._

_A pain shot through Pan's heart, but he ignored it._

_He ignored it every day for the next two years._


	14. Ash

A/N: Hey guys! If you're looking for some new PanFiction to read, I vote _Sweat and Tears _by Nellee, go and check it out.

On another note, I am here to update. Thank you so much for your reviews and favourites and follows, they are literally amazing. Thank you so much! I love you guys! xx

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Ash**

xxx

**_Thirteen Months Ago_**

_When Emma came up to her room nine months after Evie's wedding, it was with a loud sigh. Apparently, Evie's worst fears were being fulfilled quickly. Because news had just reached them that she had given birth to a baby girl, and even Snow and David had the decency to feign polite commentaries. _

_Emma threw her hand to the door in a loud punch the minute it shut. This was all her fault. How dare she have even considered that it was okay to let Evie go through with the wedding?! Go through with any of it…_

_"Now, now, Your Highness," a voice came from across the room. "I don't think the door deserves that kind of treatment."_

_Emma recognised his voice immediately. And it was with slight apprehension that she turned around, seeing him lying on her bed, sitting up against her pillows. _

_She knew that she should be scared, running, calling for the guards, doing anything other than…_

_Running at him and grabbing a pillow and hitting him repeatedly over the head with it._

_"Damn you Killian Jones!" she was hissing. "How dare you come back after eleven months and just sneak up to my bedroom! How dare you even show your face here and, good Lord, what are you wearing?"_

_Emma's mouth dropped open slightly as she took in his appearance. The vest that was so low cut it should be illegal...the pants that were clinging to absolutely every inch of him...not to mention the leather._

_"Do you like what you see, Princess?"_

_"Erm," her mouth was dry. Yes. She could feel her stomach doing little flips just by looking at him. "Yeah – NO! You left me!" Suddenly she realised that she was straddling him, and jumped off his body whilst he laughed._

_"A pirate in your room and you're still concerned about the fact that I left you."_

_"A pirate?! WHERE! GUA –"_

_But his hand was covering her mouth within seconds, and Emma whispered at his proximity. He had one hand clutching her to him by the waist, the other tracing across her face. "Are you done, Princess?"_

_It was then that she realised why he'd chosen to sneak up here, why he had so much leather on, why there was a sword perched against the windowsill._

_She gulped._

_"You…" _

_"Well, when you find out that the thing you were sent to find in another realm has potential to kill millions, it kind of doesn't lend you to thinking honourably about them all."_

_"My father sent you to…"_

_"Oh no," Killian shook his head. "This he heard from King Highmark."_

_"Fiyori's father!"_

_"Indeed," Killian answered. "So, I handed in my resignation…so to speak. You'll notice I haven't been around much."_

_"Damn right, I noticed," Emma answered. "So you're a…"_

_"Pirate," Killian supplied helpfully. "And a damn good one at that."_

_"So you…kill people, and steal and rape and…"_

_"No," he growled. "No such thing. You know me Emma, do you really believe me capable? I fight no more men than I did as a naval officer. I steal no more than the bastards I steal from deserve. And I would never treat a woman so."_

_"So, you're really not a pirate at all then," Emma's brow furrowed._

_"Grant me this one lie, Princess, and my reputation remains unharmed."_

_"What would you have me call you then," Emma asked, quirking her eyebrow. "I can't very well call you lieutenant anymore."_

_"Captain Jones, milady," he grinned, stepping back and giving a low bow, "At your service."_

_And pushing him backwards onto her bed, Emma climbed atop him and warned, "Oh, you'd better be."_

xxx

_Evelyn Asteri had held her daughter once in the past two weeks for a reason other than feeding. And even then, it was only because Fiyori had forced the child into her hands. She was barely opening her eyes, but when she did, it was to stare inquisitively at the unfamiliar face holding her._

_"I brought you into this world, you may as well get used to seeing me," Evie said, looking down at the girl and saying softly. The baby gurgled before closing her eyes again and Evie shook her head with a loud sigh._

_"Your Highness, your child shall one day rule our kingdom. Pray tell, what shall be our leader's name?"_

_Evelyn glanced down at the little girl, glad that Fiyori had at least given her some liberties._

_"Natasha," Evie murmured, before repeating louder, "Natasha Asteria Highmark."_

_And the crowd applauded, though none of them knew the brave woman who died at sea whose name lived on in the baby who would one day rule their nation._

xxx

**Present Day**

"C'mon Ash," Evie was saying, bopping the thirteen month old on her hip as she whimpered unhappily, refusing to calm down. "I need to sleep, and so do you." Evie's eyes kept darting towards the door, searching for Killian to come back and put her to sleep. The child simply wasn't working for her.

The door swung open conveniently and Killian walked in, "I cleared out the spare room for Emma. Did you want me to take Ash?"

Evie was already passing her over into Killian's arms and he was looking at her worriedly. But the moment Ash began to babble to him, he returned his attention to the child. Trying to calm her down, but all she kept doing was babbling. He threw her up in the air a few times and she laughed. But coming back down, she said words a little more distinct than babbling.

"Dada!"

Evie thought she misheard and kept folding clothes, ignoring the beat that her heart had skipped. But then she heard Ash repeating it.

Her first word.

Evie spun round to face them and Killian was looking up at her questioningly. But it wasn't a, 'what-the-hell-is-happening' face. It was an 'is-it-okay-that-this-is-her-first-word' face.

"Have you been saying that around her?" Evie said sharply. Babies learned by imitation – they both knew that. At least Killian had the decency to look ashamed.

"I thought-"

"You _thought?" _Evie was livid as she glared at him from across the room. "You thought you could ever be her father?"

"I'm as good as she's got!" Killian answered, trying to keep his frustration contained from the child in his arms whose brow was furrowing with Evie's raised voice. "You've barely touched her in the past four days. It's almost like…"

Evie's glare hardened beyond compare. He knew better than to reference those months after she'd given birth. And he turned away, clutching Ash to him.

"Give her to me," Evie said, stalking across the room, a quiet rage stilling in her eyes. Killian shied away, his hand placed protectively over Ash's head.

"She is _my_ daughter. I don't care what kind of hold you think you have on her Killian, but she is mine. She is the only reason I'm still here and I'm not going to let you take her away from me."

"I'm not trying to –"

"Then give her to me." Killian reluctantly handed her over and Evie clutched Ash to her, tightly and possessively. The only good thing she had throughout everything else that had fallen apart.

"Get out, Killian."

"Evie," he pleaded.

"I said get out."

And so he left her room, but he didn't leave the stronghold. Instead he sought the only person he knew could give him any sort of comfort. And he needed it. Evie couldn't just shut him out like that…how long had he been there for her? Helping her? Being her shoulder; her right hand man.

He breathed out before he lifted his hand on the door. It wasn't painted or well kept in any way. This was the farthest corner of the stronghold where the rooms were left if they should ever need them.

With a few sharp knocks he heard nothing. But after a few moments, he heard the sound of covers being thrown off and the dull sound of bare feet on stone. Clutching at herself in the cold, Emma opened the door warily, relaxing when she saw who it was.

"Jones," she breathed in relief, letting the door open. But her brow furrowed. "What are you doing here?"

"I…" he trailed off. Why was he here? Certainly not to take advantage of everything they could have been…

"I need someone to talk to."

"Oh," Emma said, her eyes widening, before leaning up and kissing him. It was delicate at first, like she was trying to remember what it felt like to kiss him. But he pulled away reluctantly, searching out her green eyes.

"Just talk," he whispered.

"Oh," she flushed in embarrassment. It hadn't been a euphemism. "Okay," she continued, slightly frowning when she saw the troubled look in his eye. She pulled away from him and left the door open. Killian closed it and kicked off his boots before realising that the only thing in the room was a bed, a bedside table and a bag with Emma's clothes in it.

But the minute Emma was settled on her bed, she patted the space beside her, expecting him to settle in there. He was hesitant, but he didn't fight it. This was Emma. When he sat against her pillow, she pulled his arm up to settle around her shoulders and leaned into him. He felt a wave of warm familiarity settle in then as Emma leaned into his chest. Her hand picked up his hook, running her fingers along its curved edge delicately.

"Tell me," she murmured softly.

And tell her, he did.

* * *

_Additional A/N: So, I realised after I wrote this, that some of you have different accents and this might work weirdly, but in mine, the Ash in Natasha has the 'apple' a, so Ash works normally. =P_

_Also, Queen of Dorks pointed out the difference from the pronunciation in Evelyn and Evie. Evie is pronounced like the pokemon Eevee whereas Evelyn is pronounced with a hollow E (as in end). It's just that weird thing I do, like how Pan used to call Ella 'E' even though it had a hollow E sound. _

_I confuse myself with all these E names, I really need to find a new letter…_


	15. Power

A/N: Howdy Team!

Anyone read Vampire Academy/Bloodlines? Cause legit, I'm dying after reading The Fiery Heart. Those feels combined with all my feels from fanfiction…I'm overrun by them…

Busy day, so I'm going to reply to all of your reviews right here!

_ElektraMackenzie: But then Killy would be all alone in his pining. =P_

_Scorpiongirl92: Nawws. Thank you! He definitely is, but in different ways. =)_

_Aureaborealis: She definitely will be. =)_

_Queen of Dorks: Unfortunately my brain decides to take time outs at inopportune times and gives me random short chapters after bouts of long chapters - this one included. And congrats on getting that all in one review. =P_

I love you guys! Thank you!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Power**

"Shit, Pan, you can't leave me alone for one day?!"

Evie had spun around, being shocked by the young man standing in the doorway. His face was a little confused as he looked over at the crib where a sleeping Ash was snoring softly.

"Didn't picture you for the maternal type, Evie," Pan commented. He didn't seem as attacking as usual though, he actually seemed curious.

"Didn't picture you as the annoying fly type, Pan," she retorted, "What do you want?"

"You know what I want, Evie," he said.

"Do I?" Evie answered with a furrowed brow, "You seem to fuck me at all hours, but that isn't going to make me love you."

"It did before."

"You think I loved you because of the physicialities?" Evie scoffed. "I loved you because you took me away. You gave me an escape and that was amazing."

Pan was in front of her then, his fingertips tracing down her arms with a curious look in his eyes. "You think that you didn't just get lost in me?"

Evie couldn't answer that. Because damn. He was right.

"Leave me, Pan," she whispered as his face drew closer.

"Why?" he breathed. "You want it –"

There was no denying that. But beneath her desire for Pan was something stronger. Evie's elbow came up to Pan's gut and he was forced back, winded by the impact. He clutched at his body in surprise. When had she learnt to do that?

"You don't think I'd have so many people to protect without protecting them," she said, strongly. "I'm not going to just let you come in here, making demands, threatening. We can take you on. You and your lost boys; we can take you out."

"You've changed," Pan commented, still pained. But there was a glimmer of respect in his words now as he watched her.

"Thank God," Evie said, before looking back at him with wide eyes.

"Why?"

"You really want to know what happened after you sent me away from Neverland, Pan?"

He remained silent, but Evie was too wound up to care at that point.

"My husband took me in, took my wealth, my title, my freedom. And who was I? But the shining _pure_ girl who quickly gave the kingdom an heir."

"Well would you look at that," Pan smirked, walking over to her. "Maybe I didn't ruin you for all men after all. Did you enjoy it?"

Evie was that close to snapping and punching him in the face. But she held in her anger, clenching her fists as she continued.

"I spent the first few months nursing my child, doing what was expected. Until the day came when my baby's eyes changed colour. She was holding onto my finger tightly, looking up at me when I first spotted that she had neither my brown, nor my husband's blue, or any of our parents either. Instead, she stared up at me with eyes I hadn't seen in over a year."

Pan gazed at her in astonishment as he realised what she was getting at. But Evie didn't relent her steely gaze, perhaps even a little happy that she saw the fear in her eyes.

"She was taken from me and I was cast out," Evie said indifferently, determined not to let Pan see how much that moment had torn her from the inside out. Seeing her child cry out, not because of the small connection she felt to her mother, but because Evie had cried for her. "It's funny how quick people who once claimed to love you can turn on you and call you the Kingdom's Slut. You know, my husband had all his women on the side, but they never called him a whore!"

"I was left to fend for myself on the streets," she said, still staring at Pan as his face grew more and more horrified. "And you know what seventeen year old girls sell on the streets."

"You didn't –"

"I'm not done, Pan," she cut across him harshly. "I did, until sickness overtook me, and I hid away in some back alley. Then someone found me, and because of him, I have my daughter back and I have my girls here. And I have a life. And _you,"_she spat pointedly, "have no part in that."

"I don't want a part in that." But something in his words didn't ring true. And Evie saw it as his eyes darted to the crib, his brow furrowing.

"Can I see her?"

"You may have played your part in creating her," Evie answered, moving in front of Ash's crib, protectively. "But you left her as much as you left me. You have no place in our lives."

"I do," Pan said, stepping forward, an adamance shining in his eyes, before promising, a fierce and truthful promise, "And I will make you see that."

Aith those words, he was gone. And Evie was breathing heavily...but she'd stood up to him.

For the first time, she thought she felt something like power in her veins.

xxx

_**Eight Months Ago**_

_Killian Jones, or as people had taken to calling him after the Dark One cut off his hand, Hook, was walking through the streets of Hintar with one sole purpose. To get as drunk as he possibly could._

_Emma was missing. Dead? Worse? He didn't know. And that scared him more than he could question. It had been five months since he'd last seen her, since she'd kicked him out of her sheet when her father came knocking, hidden him under the bed, then given him a searingly hot kiss goodbye and practically pushed him off her balcony to climb down back to his ship._

_But she was gone now. _

_He'd kept an eye out for her in the surrounding towns but the past few weeks had turned up nothing except a few brushes with King David's guards. But he was here now, to forget all about it. Maybe find someone to forget about it with._

_But he couldn't get her out of his head._

_The thought of her eyes, staring up at him in awe as he held her after they made love, her mischievous grins when she'd pull pranks on her parents, her fierce determination…her deepest regrets._

_No. She wasn't dead. He couldn't think like that._

_It was just as he was preparing to head into the tavern that he heard it. At first he thought he might ignore it. But guilt tugged at him. What if it was Emma? What if it wasn't...did it really matter? They needed help._

_"Come on little lady," a leering voice was saying, "You just need to sit on up. There's a good girl."_

_"…no…" Killian managed to discern amongst the soft whimpers. "Please…"_

_That was enough to make him walk around to the side of the alley to find the man, pulling at the girl's dirtied clothing in a hurry to get her undressed, but she was fighting him weakly, evidently ill and unable to properly fight him off._

_Her eyes widened in hope when she saw the approaching figure, until she saw the garb of the pirate and her body fell. She gave up._

_Of course, when Killian grabbed the man with his hook and literally pulled him off the girl, she collapsed on the ground and with a few threatening words the man was running for his life. However much Hook wanted to gut the man, the girl obviously needed more help. _

_Covered in rags, dirt and what looked like dried blood, her eyes were already falling shut. Whether she was slipping into unconsciousness, delirium or death, Killian couldn't do anymore than what he was doing. In that moment, he simply picked her up in his arms and walked with her out of the alley._

_The nearest healer was a few towns away from this small inlet, and he could only hope and pray that the fragile girl would last the journey. She began to stir in his arms and he tried his best to not look down at her. But apparently she was looking at him._

_"Killian?" she murmured questioningly albeit weakly, her brown eyes searching out his blue ones. He looked down at her in surprise. _

_"How do you know my name?"_

_"I'm sorry," she said, before coughing loudly, a wheezing hacking cough. "I'm sorry I fell in love with him..."_

_"Shh, love," he murmured, searching her face for a moment before he finally connected what she was saying with who he was holding. He would have dropped her were it not for the fact that all he wanted to do was clutch her to his chest and never let her go._

_"I'll protect you, Evie."_

_And she faded off quickly into unconsciousness._


	16. Talks

A/N: Hey guys! I'm so sorry for having such short chapters lately! Just getting work sorted, and today was party prep and tomorrow is the party - so I'm kinda swamped. We most likely won't get an update tomorrow (my apologies), but I'll try my best for Sunday.

On the good side, it's a countdown of 12 days until my 18th birthday! Yay!

Again, almost about to fall asleep at my computer, so this has to be quick!

_**Scorpiongirl92:**__ All caps? I FEEL YOUR EXCITEMENT!  
__**Aureaborealis:**__ I'm glad! Killy has a place on my desktop wallpaper, I feel he deserves a place in all our hearts. AND OH MY GOSH! You call me that again, and I might just purposefully fly overseas to give you a ginourmous hug!  
__**ElektraMackenzie:**__ That just sounds...really...hot...  
__**Nellee:**__ I swear, I am not trying to drown you! But yeah, defs Ash. She's de only baby we need to be thinking about. =P_

Aight. Onwards!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Talks**

"So, do Snow and David know?"

"Know what?" Emma replied to Evie from beside her as Evie tried to feed Ash. The little girl was being more compliant than usual and she was extremely grateful.

"That you're alive? That you're safe?"

Emma shrugged, another bite of bread making its way into her mouth.

"You should probably tell them, you know," Evie continued as Ash's mouth swallowed the porridge on her spoon before giving Evie a proud grin that Evie returned.

"And have them send out search parties again? Trying to haul me back to the palace to keep me safe. They'd probably give me to some foreign king in order to keep me…shit Evie. I'm sorry."

Evie waved her hand, "All in the past." All haunting the past.

"I heard rumours that you were dead," Emma said, with a furrowed brow. "They were never substantial though; Hintar's pretty private."

"They'd have to be to keep their Prince's travelling pants under wraps."

Evie and Emma shared a conspiratory laugh then as they glanced at each other. Evie felt a pang go through her when she thought of all the laughs they used to share back when they were close. But now, side by side, it was as though nothing had changed. And the smile didn't leave her face for a while.

Until Killian came down from the end of the hall, his eyes bleary-eyes from sleep as he ran his hands through his hair.

"Morning," he yawned, as he sat down beside Emma, reaching for a piece of bread and some jam. Emma watched him intently as he held the bread down with his hook as he spread the pink spread over the surface. Evie rolled her eyes; she'd seen it a thousand times before.

"We need to redo the rosters for next week, Killian," Evie reminded him, completely ignoring everything that had happened last night. Although…the direction he'd come into the hall did bring forth questions of where he'd been…

"You can put me on it," Emma said, with a grin. Evie nodded appreciatively. She was staying then. Her… her sister was staying.e turned back to continue feeding Ash, but the little girl had caught sight of Killian and her green eyes had gone wide.

"Dada! Dada!" Ash was saying, her hands opening and closing as she reached for Killian with an adorable pout on her small face.

"I really am sorry, Evie," he apologised, not seeing the way Emma's face was growing confused and fearful in those few moments.

"Do you mind helping Sarah and Alessia wash up, Emma?" Evie asked gently, forgetting for a moment that Emma had spent the last eight months working in a tavern.

"Sure thing," she answered with a grin.

"We need to talk," Evie said quickly, turning back to Killian with a small sigh, before standing up and strolling back to Ash's room with him hot on her heels.

xxx

**_Eight Months Ago_**

_After yelling at Smee to draw up a bath, Killian carried Evie into his cabin where he laid her down upon his bed. Quickly lighting the candles about the room, he came back to where she was lying, breathing raggedly and twitching every time she tried to move._

_"Evie," Killian murmured when he saw the cuts that were bleeding through her torn dress. "Evie, you're bleeding."_

_She gave a non-committal groan in response and tried to turn away from him but she merely hurt herself again and shifted into stillness._

_"Doesn't matter," she finally muttered._

_"It fucking well does matter, Evie!" Killian said, "Shit, your wounds could be infected; they could be making you worse! I need to clean them."_

_Evie's muscles tensed as she heard what he was saying. Holding back her sigh, she resignedly brought her hurting up to her dress weakly and began to loosen the buttons, holding it together. Eyes widening, Killian realised she'd misconstrued what he meant._

_With extremely gently hands, he stilled hers. She flinched at his touch. _

_"You know me, Evie," he said, tenderly, blue eyes shining. "I'm still the same person."_

_"You're a pirate," she said, her voice sounding dry. "I know what you expect."_

_"For the sake of our sanity, Princess, let's pretend that tonight I'm not."_

_But Evie was still wary as he slid his hand around her back and helped her to her feet. Smee was just walking in at that point carrying a bucket of boiling water and a bucket of cold water. Leaving them on Killian's desk, he exited quickly, knowing better than to pester his Captain when Killian had that troubled look in his eye. _

_"Can you stand?" he murmured to Evie who nodded, barely. Leaning her on the desk, Killian reached for the buckets and began to pour them into the tub until the water was the right temperature. However, he couldn't just dump Evie in the bath…_

_"Can you undress yourself if I turn around, Evie?"_

_There was a moments silence before she muttered pathetically, avoiding eye contact, "No. I…I need help."_

_Killian tried to get it over and done with quickly. She stared blankly at a wall and Killian felt an intense rage fill him when he thought of how many men had violated her. He gently pulled her clothes from her until she was in her underpants and breast bindings and began to take in the full extent of what had harmed her._

_There were scratches and bite marks across her skin, what even looked like a festering wound on her right hip from a knife. Her body was thin and sickly was malnutrition, a bare glimpse of what it once was._

_"Evie," he breathed in horror. _

_"Are you going to just stand there looking at me or are you going to help me?" she said harshly, seeing the pity in his eyes and wanting none of it. She hated admitting she needed help so this was bad enough. She didn't want it to last for any longer._

_"Yeah, sorry, I'll just…" She leant back on his desk wearily as Killian opened a cupboard and grabbed a washcloth. Dipping it into the warm water, he began to dab at the dried blood of her wounds, wiping away the dirt until they were clean. When they were cleared of grime, Killian helped Evie to lower herself into the bath, making sure to keep well away from touching too much of her skin._

_She hissed as she hit the water, but sinking down, Killian thought he heard her groan in relief. When was the last time she'd had a bath? When was the last time she'd eaten?!_

_"I'll be back in a minute," Killian promised before heading down to the galley to try and find something edible. They were going to replenish food tomorrow so the most he could find was some stale bread and what looked like salmon from dinner last night. It would have to do._

_"Evie, I got some food…what are you doing?" She was sitting on his bed completely naked, and it only gave highlight to her mistreatment. Killian walked across the room and placed his food at his desk. Pointedly, he walked to his closet and found an old shirt that would cover her decently. Wordlessly, he threw it at her._

_"I don't know what you hope to achieve by bringing me here, Killian but I –"_

_"I want to help you!" he said adamantly as he spun around, glad that she was now covered. "Look at you! You can barely walk, barely move. I'm not going to take advantage of you! I don't know what you've gone through…"_

_Yes you do. It's painted all over her skin._

_"…but I am going to help you. You are never going back there again, okay?"_

_Evie was looking at him strangely. It was a look he'd never seen in her eyes…_

_Distrust._

_"What do I have to do to make you believe me?" he asked, still remaining a safe distance away from her._

_"Get me Natasha back," Evie said without a moment's hesitation. She was looking up at Killian challengingly, as though she didn't believe he would do it._

_"Done."_

_"Are you serious?" Evie scoffed, before something caught in her throat and she was overtaken by a coughing fit. Killian ran to get her a mug of water which she gulped down greedily. "Thanks," she breathed finally._

_"But really," Evie continued, looking over at him, "The royal family kept it amongst themselves that they cast me out. To the rest of Hintar, I'm dead. My baby is still the heir. How are you intending to get into the castle and take back my baby?"_

_"Wait…" Killian frowned, "Natasha isn't Prince Fiyori's?"_

_"Nope," Evie said, but didn't offer anything more and Killian knew better than to push it._

_"I'm a pirate, love," he finally grinned. "Stealing things is my speciality."_

_"First though," Killian continued with a soft smile, grabbing a piece of bread and holding it out, "You're going to eat."_

_And the hint of a grin that played on Evie's lips felt strange._

_But it felt nice._


	17. Rescue

A/N: Party leftovers? Best. Thing. Out.

Eating Ice-Cream cake and drinking Creaming Soda. And floating on a cloud…

Thank you my lovelies for reviewing! I swear, I will get back to you all at some stage! But I've been writing in an awkward position all day and I feel like my back is about to collapse in on itself (excuses, excuses, I know).

Anyway, enjoy! xx

* * *

**Rescue**

xxx

**_Eight Months Ago_**

_Killian didn't waste any time in dealing with Evie's request. That night when she was asleep, he ordered that no one venture into the cabin, and with most of them being honest sailors who had, undoubtedly, just returned from bedding a pretty lass, he was fairly sure they were sated and Evie was safe. _

_Heading into the nearest tavern, he did a quick once over of its visitors before taking a seat. A barmaid was quick to come over to him, "Rum thanks. And some of your company if you don't mind."_

_The barmaid seemed happily flushed at that, undoubtedly finding herself extremely lucky to have such a good looking man take notice of her. She wasn't especially plain, in fact, she was quite pretty. But Killian Jones knew he had a face and body that made ladies swoon. Thankfully, tonight, that was going to help him get what he needed. _

_When she came back, she had a renewed flirtatious gleam in her eye. Placing the mug on the table, she slid carefully onto the wooden bench beside him, close enough so that their skin was touching. Inwardly sighing, Killian silently turned on his pirate charm._

_"You're a beautiful, lass," he complimented the girl, who blushed profusely. "Why do you work in such a place?"_

_"It pays the bills," she answered with a shrug, before glancing at him suggestively, "And I get to see some handsome faces."_

_"What's your name, love?" Killian asked._

_"Undine," she answered with an impish grin._

_"Tell me then, Undine," Killian continued, snaking his arm around her waist. "Have you heard anything about the missing Princess lately?"_

_The girl furrowed her brow, "Not of late. Wasn't she dead?"_

_"Aye, that's what I've heard. But there have been other rumours, that she's trying to steal back her daughter."_

_"But that would be impossible," the girl laughed, "The Princess is kept under strict guard because she is the only heir. The King and Queen would…"_

_Undine looked at him knowingly then._

_"What are you wishing to steal, Pirate?"_

_"What are you willing to share, Undine," he said huskily, bringing her close enough that she was almost sitting in his lap._

_ "My shift ends in five minutes. I'll meet you out back."_

I'm sorry, Emma,_ he prayed silently in his head as he downed his drink and made his way out back. He let the barmaid lead him from the tavern to a cottage not far away. _

_He didn't leave her wanting, giving much more than he was taking because in his mind, this was still a betrayal. Not knowing whether Emma was dead or not didn't give him reason to act like she was…but this was necessary._

_With his head between the girl's naked thighs, she came apart upon his lips, her body shuddering for the last time as she panted out her release, attempting to catch her breath._

_Killian crawled up beside her turning to face her as she did the same._

_"This girl, the princess," Undine mused, "She'll be very important to you one day."_

_"She already is," Killian answered honestly, thinking of Evie and the importance the baby princess had to her._

_"More than that. She'll…I don't know. I can't quite see it."_

_"Because, of course, you can see the future?" Killian almost rolled his eyes. _

_"I didn't bring you to my bed because you were just any ordinary man, Killian Jones," Undine said, rolling over until she was hovering over his naked body. "I brought you here because you needed help. But before I give you your information, I want payment."_

_Still confused about how she knew his name because he definitely hadn't given it, he began, "Didn't I just –"_

_"I don't want pleasure," Undine said, her face twisting upwards in a mischievous smile, "However, mind-blowing it was. I want something else. I want a song."_

_"A song?" Killian asked incredulously._

_"You'll sing to her," Undine said, referring to future events, "So I want you to sing to me."_

_"But I –"_

_"Sing." It wasn't a request. _

_And so Killian picked the first thing that came to mind, a sea shanty that his crew sang whilst they were working. And Undine listened with eyes closed as she hovered over him, her face lost, peaceful. The moment he finished, however, her eyes opened, and in them, he thought he saw a glimpse of golden light, but it was gone as quickly as it had come._

_"That should do it," she said with a smile, rolling off of Killian and lying back down next to him._

_"The Princess is tended to by a nurse, in the westernmost tower of the castle. It's almost impossible to scale, but there is a certain way up the bricks that take the form of a swirl around the tower. Guards are at the bottom of the tower, but at the top, you only have to contend with the nurse. She's particularly susceptible to chloroform."_

_"To _what_?"_

_"Go to the apothecary, he'll know what I mean."_

_"And how do you even know this?" Hook asked, staring at the naked girl incredulously._

_"Because, of course, I can see the future," she grinned before pushing him lightly. "Now go on, you've got a couple of princesses to save."_

_He could swear he hadn't mentioned Evie._

_"Thank you, Undine," Killian said as he pulled his pants back on. "Honestly, your help is invaluable."_

_"Don't be thanking me just yet, Captain," Undine said as he walked out the door. She gave him a small wave, "Candle's still burning."_

_And having no clue what she meant, he left._

_After Undine's puzzling but specific instructions, getting into the castle was a cinch. His black coat hid him under the cover of darkness and whilst his muscles argued with him the entire way up the tower, he kept going. Of course, once he'd knocked the nurse out with the chloroform, he ascertained that he was keeping that vial for the rest of his days; it was a godsend. And he scooped up the sleeping baby in a few blankets, made a makeshift sling around his body and tried…but failed….to make it hold._

_"Ah shit," he muttered._

_The baby stirred in her sleep._

_"You didn't hear that, Princess, okay?" he muttered to the sleeping girl who looked as though her lips had tilted into a smile. _

_God, two minutes and Natasha Asteria Highmark already had him wrapped around her little finger._

_He was going to have to fight his way out of this because there was no way he was climbing down the tower and dropping the precious cargo he had. But he managed it. Using all that chloroform…he'd have to go back and get more…_

_Unless they had given him exactly enough. That apothecary had looked just as suspiciously psychic as Undine had…_

_But he made it out of the castle unscathed and breathing heavily with the quick sprints he'd had to make. Ash was asleep through it all._

_He was already down by the docks when he heard the warning bells ringing and the sound of shouts erupting. Climbing up the gangplank, he was about to wake the crew and tell them to cast off when he saw someone running towards him. Glancing down at Ash, he saw that she was curling into him as he stood still._

_"Captain!" Smee called out. Killian's head shot up from the bundle asleep contentedly in his arms. Smee was frantically running up to him._

_"Your girl. She's getting worse."_

xxx

**Present Day**

Evie sat down with Ash in her lap. The little girl had a ring of toys in her hand and was content to play with them while she spoke with Killian. The pirate in question, sat down opposite her, looking thoroughly prepared for a lecture or berating. One would think Evie was _his_ mother the way he was acting.

"Well, I can't undo what you've done," Evie began.

"Technically, if I just keep saying Killian, she might get around to it."

"She's a baby," Evie said looking at him doubtfully, "She's going to call you Killy. And you hate that."

"Ah…" Killian trailed off. "That's true."

"So, I'm okay with it."

"What?!" Killian mouth dropped open in surprise. Whatever yelling and horrendous threats he'd seen coming from Evie's mouth, it wasn't that. Evie was saying that it was…okay?

"But I…you…" He composed himself. "You seemed pretty shitty about it last night."

"That's because I was," Evie answered evenly, "It was just a little bit of a shock."

"You're a better father than I could've ever hoped to have for her," Evie finally admitted. "And I know I don't thank you often enough, but I am, truly. I can't tell you how grateful I am…"

"Evie it's okay," Killian said. "It's fine. I'm always here for you, you know that."

"I do," she nodded genuinely, "Thank you."

"So, if she calls me _that_ again…"

"I'll smile and nod. And wait until she decides to call me Mama."

A moment's silence passed before Evie commented, "You should probably tell Emma that Ash isn't yours. The way she looked when you came in here was a little accusatory."

"Er…" Killian scratched the back of his head, seeming a little nervous. "Yeah."

"Are you okay?" Evie's brow furrowed, a smile playing at her lips when she realised that Killian was actually worried. "Is Captain Hook nervous about a _girl_?"

"Not the girl," he rolled his eyes, "Just worried that the girl's spent eight months missing. And I haven't seen her in almost an entire year. What if she's been with someone else in that time?"

"Why don't you just _ask_ her?" Evie offered. "No harm in that, right?"

"There's always harm when I ask you questions," he muttered under his breath.

"Oh?" Evie raised her eyebrows challengingly.

Killian hesitated before asking, still unsure if Evie would answer. "So who is he?"

Sure, a lot of time had passed since he last asked the question, but he still wasn't sure if she'd let him in. Evie, on the other hand, seemed to be internally warring with herself to either let him know and finally be free of the burden that only she, and now Pan, knew. But she couldn't. She couldn't admit it.

She was ashamed.

And she felt horrible for it. Ash was beautiful; the most beautiful thing she'd ever found in this world. But she hated the way that she had come into the world. She should've had a mother who loved her from the moment she escaped her womb, a father who stayed and would love her. She should've had a better life. And Ash could now. With this family; without Pan.

"I can't, Killian," Evie sighed finally.

So he left it at that, rising from his seat, and going off to find Emma.


	18. Rumours

A/N: Aight. This is the longest chapter in a VERY long time.

But here it is, wrapped up in a bow, and gifted to you! I'd love to know what you guys think, so don't be afraid to review! And thank you to my readers, favourites and followers, I love you guys!

Enjoy! xx

* * *

**Rumours**

xxx

**_Eight Months Ago_**

_Evie was lost in unconsciousness by the time the crew landed the ship in the Healer's town. Killian carried Evie off the ship hurriedly, ordering Smee to watch over a sleeping Princess as he did so. Lying upon that desk where he placed her in the back room of an old dilapidated cottage, the hunched old lady came and looked over Evie. Giving her a dismissive look, the woman muttered in broken English, "She is very ill. It…not be easy."_

_"Anything," he said earnestly. "Payment, herbs; I'll get you whatever you need."_

_"Space," the lady said with those beady eyes of hers, eyeing him until he stepped back from Evie's still body. The lady pulled out some herbs that she began to grind into a fine powder with a well practiced hand. Setting light to the end of a stem of sage she began to chant over Evie's body, scenting the air and muttering in a foreign language._

_"Are you using magic?" Killian's eyes widened in horror. Magic was the realm of darkness. He wouldn't let such evil touch Evie's being._

_"She will die," the healer said shortly. "White magic. Natural. Good."_

_Killian's brow furrowed. Looking at it, he could see that already, Evie was breathing easier with the flow of white that was beginning to encompass her body._

_"What is it doing?"_

_"Stop talking," the lady said harshly and Killian shut his mouth, lest she suddenly make a mistake and Evie die right there upon the table._

_Still with her eyes closed, Evie's hands began to clench and unclench on the desk as though in pain. It was a pain that made Killian fear. _

_It was only moments later when her body convulsed. He leapt forward but the lady held him back with a strength he didn't realise she possessed. But Evie's body continued to contort violently, only, as Killian watched on, horrified, he saw the wound on her hip beginning to close up, the bruises on her body fleeing._

_And as she finally stilled, her lungs were clear of all ailments, her breathing coming evenly and her face slowly returning to its normal colour. The white flow of magic faded from the healer's hand and she dropped the arm that was stopping Killian. He jumped forward, taking a hold of Evie's hand tightly, "Evie? You alive?"_

_"She will not wake," the lady said from where she was putting away her, "Not for hours. Her…body is recovering. But she is well."_

_"She's okay?"_

_The lady nodded, holding out her hand expectantly. Killian handed over a small bag of rubies which she examined before nodding as though the terms were acceptable. At that, Killian picked Evie up, wrapping in the blanket in which he'd brought her, and left. But relief did not settle in until he laid her back on his bed and saw her curl onto her side, clutching his pillow. Of course, Sme came running in after that with a crying princess._

_"Out, out!" Killian hurried him so as to not wake up Evie. "Geez man, I've got a woman who almost died in there and you're bringing in a crying baby?"_

_"She hasn't stopped since you left!" he answered, shuffling the child into Killian's arms where she frowned with a wail before quietening quickly. Surprised, Killian bounced the child up and down a few times before Smee looked at him completely gobsmacked, "But how did you –"_

_"Don't know," Killian answered with a shrug as the baby in his arms began to gurgle happily. Realisation hit then. "She's probably hungry too. It's not just you, Smee."_

_"Well, what are we supposed to feed her?" _

_"We'll have to wait until Evie wakes up," he sighed, looking down at the Princess, "And just hope that this little monster doesn't start screaming again."_

_At the word monster, Natasha's brow furrowed. Intelligent little star, Killian thought momentarily, that's for sure._

_"Fine then, little star," he said and she nodded as though it was more suitable, eyes drifting closed and falling into sleep once more._

xxx

_Evie awoke a few hours later, aware, alive and feeling as though she'd had an old skin removed and been clothed in the finest silk; not just Killian's silk sheets._

_"Evie?" Killian asked, looking upward hopefully from the book he had in his right hand. "You're…you're okay?"_

_Evie nodded, her wide eyes staring at the bundle he held in his hooked arm, leaning contentedly into his body. She seemed frozen for a moment before looking up at him in awe._

_"You did it."_

_"Yeah," Killian answered, putting his book down and standing up._

_"I didn't think you would," Evie breathed, her eyes wide and hopeful as she moved to stand up. Her legs wobbled for a moment, but then she was fine, crossing the room swiftly until she was right in front of him._

_And yet, even as she looked down at Natasha's face, she seemed distant…afraid somewhat. And with a confused face, Killian tried to hand the child over. But Evie took a step back._

_"Evie…"_

_"No, you've got her, she's asleep, that's fine," she said with a small smile. "She's fine. She's safe. That's good."_

_"Evie…"_

_"So where are we headed?" Evie changed the subject abruptly. _

_"I was actually headed home." One more round trip to find Emma._

_"To Snow and David's kingdom?" Evie frowned. But then she thought about it. She didn't have to go back to the palace. Just the town. And if she was secret, maybe she could live there happily enough._

_"Okay," Evie said with a nod._

_"Well, this little star is weighing on my arm, so if you would be so kind…" He held her out to Evie once more and this time she reluctantly took her. _

_"She'll probably be hungry when she wakes up," Killian commented._

_"Of course," Evie murmured, looking down at the little girl with an almost confused affection, before looking back up at Killian curiously, "You called her 'little star'."_

_"Well, I know that you liked the stars," he shrugged, remembering her horse's name and the present he gave her for her fourteenth birthday. "I thought it fitting."_

_"It's perfect," Evie sighed almost contentedly. As long as she kept Ash safe, it was perfect._

xxx

**_Five Months Ago_**

_"Xenia! I swear, if you don't come down from there…"_

_Xenia was hanging upside down from the newly built supports for the underground dining room. Her arms were wide in abandon, but Evie definitely didn't trust that the girl wouldn't fall and break her neck. The other girls, all seven of them, were just as worried. Even Ash was looking up at Xenia with a frown from Sarah's arms._

_"Okay, okay," she finally laughed, scrambling to the right way up before sliding back along the wooden railing and jumping off the wall to the floor like a nimble monkey. "See. I'm safe, Mom."_

_"And you're not going out on Saturday," Evie said sternly as she pulled Xenia in for a crushing hug. "God, don't ever do that again."_

_"Mom, I'm sorry, you're crushing me."_

_"That's because I want your feet on the ground."_

_"Oh, I don't know, the sea might be a better place," a familiar laughing voice came from across the room._

_Evie's head jolted upwards, looking past Xenia's light hair to where Killian was standing in the doorway. Her eyes widened in surprised wonder as Xenia wiggled her way out of Evie's arms._

_"What the hell are you doing here?"_

_"Now is that really any way to welcome an old friend?" He was leaning there perusing the room appraisingly with a smiling gleam in his blue eyes. It only took Evie a moment to sprint across the room and fling herself on him, her hands wrapping tightly around his neck as he pulled her to him by the waist._

_"I missed you," she whispered as she clung to him. "Did you…find what you were looking for?"_

_"No," he answered. Evie hadn't known he'd been searching for Emma, but she hadn't pressed it when Killian had given her some gold to kick start her life and left, free spirit that he was. But he knew within him. Emma was still alive. And if it was meant to be, she would find her way back to him._

_"But I'm here to help," he said finally, pulling away to look at her, "If you'll have me."_

_"You're happy to be put to work?" _

_"Anywhere you need me to be," he grinned._

_"My my, I wonder how Killian Jones does in the kitchen?" Evie said with her brow raised._

_"As well as can be expected," he smirked._

_"But, I suspect you'll be a far more appreciated babysitter," Evie continued, turning to Sarah and asking her for Ash. Bringing her over, Ash looked up at Killian and quickly began to smile at the sight of him. Killian reached out and her hand wrapped around his finger. A warmth lit up his face that Evie felt flood the whole room._

_"Sometimes I might need to duck out, just still searching, you know," he commented, almost asking permission of Evie._

_"Of course," Evie nodded, looking at him as though he was incredulous to question her. "We'll always be here. We're family."_

_And Ash gurgled in agreement._

xxx

**Present Day**

When Evie woke up the next morning, Killian already had Ash up and changed and was just edging out of the door when she opened her eyes.

"What's the time?" Evie murmured sleepily.

"Seven," he muttered from the doorway. "Go back to sleep, love. Emma and I will take care of things."

A twinge of something foreign went through her at his words as he shut the door. Only in that moment, Evie realised that maybe it wasn't so foreign. She knew what it was. It was echoed in the empty room.

It was loneliness.

She threw her covers off her body, loathe to return to her dreams and the images that they'd left in her mind. Her subconscious was giving her torturous images of Pan's body on hers, making her feel things that she was trying to push far, far away.

Instead they were merely embedding deeply into her being. And she hated it.

She got dressed quickly, ignoring breakfast and intending to head out on a food supply run but Killian caught her. Handing her a piece of toast, buttered and topped with blackberry jam, he waited for her to take it. Even as she tried to leave he stopped her, forcing her to eat it before she left.

"What was that for?" Evie asked once she'd hurriedly eaten in within a minute.

"That was for me not seeing you having eaten more than two bites in the past two days," Killian said, eyeing her worriedly. "Are you sure you should be going out?"

"Things need to get done around here, Killian," Evie answered, not sure why she was so annoyed at him. She glanced over his shoulder and saw that Emma was playing with Ash, making faces at her and making her child laugh. And that shiver of loneliness ran through her again...

"I have to go."

And she exited the stronghold before anything else could make her feel worse.

The glare took a moment to get used to, but after a while, Evie came to enjoy the fresh breath of air running off the water. She strolled through the town towards the shops where she bought the fruit and vegetables they'd need for the rest of the week.

After getting the bread, she went to the butcher, and that was where she heard the whispering.

"…they cross the lands of Hintar….hmm?...yes, the Evil Queen has given orders…an alliance with King Highmark…they seek to eradicate a threat…I've heard word it's just a boy…but also they search for the missing Princess…"

Evie froze up. The Evil Queen was scared. She was lashing out because there as another threat. It was common knowledge that she was out for Snow and David, but as of yet she'd been biding her time. But here she was…trying to find Ash…

But Pan was here too. And he was planning and plotting to take the kingdom that she wanted. And she was threatened.

Solution: Eradicate the problem.

Kill Pan; find Ash.

Evie ran from the place without a second thought.

She didn't bother knocking on any doors in the inn. Running past the sound of lost boys that she heard up and down the halls, she burst into Pan's room without a second thought, surprising not only herself, but Pan too.

The moment she saw that he was standing there shirtless, his hair still mussed from sleep, she was overcome by a sudden wave of lust, and wordlessly she began to pull off her dress.

"What are you doing, Evie?" Pan asked, his eyes glazing over as she removed her layers until she was standing there naked.

"I want you to fuck me," she said blatantly. Her words could wait for later. Here; standing here in front of him, the loneliness wasn't hidden from her anymore. It was all around her, in her…all encompassing... "Until I can't feel anything."

"That, my love," Pan said stalking forward with that dark gleam in his eyes, "Is something I'm quite adept at."

It was a very good thing he'd sound proofed the walls.

xxx

Pan's dreams were the most pleasurable he'd had in a long time. Never had Evie featured so vividly. So beautifully naked and all his to do with as he pleased.

When he awoke later that afternoon, having fallen asleep at midday after hours spent all over the room with Evie, he felt himself in desperate need of attention. And unwilling to lose the vision behind his eyes, he reached down for his ready cock, preparing to complete his dream where it left off.

Only there was already someone there.

Pan opened his eyes to find Evie's mouth surrounding him. She had her eyes closed as she pumped him in and out of her mouth, one hand at his base and the other reaching down to where he couldn't see it. But she would only be doing one thing.

He wanted to reach out and touch her, but instead, he closed his eyes, not wanting to let her know that he was awake. But when she licked the underside of his manhood and took him in as far as she could, he couldn't restrain himself anymore.

"Fuck, Evie," he groaned, clutching at the sheets beside him. "You're just as good as I remember."

He felt her smile around him as she continued to take him in, until he spiralled into his climax, spurting himself into her mouth and feeling her swallow. Spineless, he slumped onto his pillow, looking up at the ceiling in amazement. Evie removed herself from his cock, but continued to toy with her own wetness until Pan couldn't take the sound anymore and growled, "Get up here."

As she crawled forward, Pan pulled her into him desperately until she was straddling his chest. Expecting his fingers to make quick work of her, she was surprised when he pulled her forward again by her hips until her legs were on either side of his face. His tongue darted out, surprising her as he tasted her completely soaking juices. She moaned, clasping onto the headboard as she ground into his face, his tongue dancing through her folds as he brought two fingers up to plunge into her until he felt her beginning to come apart and her walls clamped down on his fingers, juices flooding his mouth as she moaned out her release.

She slid down him to lie beside him, breathing heavily whilst he turned into her, tracing lazy patterns over the smooth skin of her arm.

"So, can you still remember your name?" he smirked, leaning down to kiss her shoulder, "Or only mine?"

"Stop. Talking. Pan." She groaned, throwing herself on top of him again, and shutting him up with a fierce kiss.

"Ahh, the latter then," he grinned, pulling away to purposefully incense her. "Tell me Evie, did you succeed?"

_No. God no._

She kissed him again, slightly softer this time with just the tiniest desperate edge to it. When she finally pulled away, it was to mutter with a furrowed brow, "She's out to find Ash."

"Who is?" Pan's eyes widened as he heard what Evie said. She was put off by that; it almost seemed like genuine concern. Leaning back, she straddled him so that they could talk without their lips entangling.

"Regina," she continued, "She's agreed to help King Highmark find the 'heir' and in return, assuming my inside knowledge is correct, he would have lent her the Immortals."

"Isn't that the army of another land in a different realm?"

"What?" Evie asked in confusion.

"Never mind," Pan said shaking his head, "But 10 000 warriors, right? The elite?"

"Exactly," Evie nodded before biting down on her lip. "They're coming for Ash."

"Then we have to protect her!" He was sitting up now, his body pressed against Evie, green eyes wide and frantic, such a perfect replica of his daughter's. Evie couldn't help the hand that began to trace down Pan's face as she leant in. She breathed him in, his scent, his warmth, and rested her forehead on his until their noses touched.

"She's out to kill you."

Pan looked up into Evie's eyes as he rubbed his nose delicately against hers. It didn't seem strange, instead it was oddly comforting as he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. "As long as we protect Ash," he answered before his lips touched hers lightly.

He was seeking permission, Evie finally realised, granting it as she opened her mouth and wove her hands up into his hair, deepening the kiss. Her fingertips ran down his chest to where her slow rocking was making him hard once again.

"No," Pan muttered as she reached down to grasp him. "There's no point now. We're protecting Ash remember. No use in trying to forget ourselves for a few more hours."

So he'd been trying to forget too. Maybe they were more alike than she thought…

"I don't want to forget," Evie finally murmured into his lips, exploring his mouth as his hands too began to wander down her soft flesh, caressing her skin with touches so gentle she'd never thought them possible from his hands.

She could sense what this was leading to, but she didn't want it to stop. It was beautiful, to feel him as she slipped down upon him, filling her as she rocked into him slowly and leisurely. They took their time, exploring each other with fingers and lips until neither could take it anymore.

"Evie," Pan murmured, as he felt a deep stirring within him. "Evie." And he kept repeating it like a prayer as he came. And it wasn't only the sensations that rocked Evie that made her fall apart, it was the way that he looked up at her in that moment, the way that she, undoubtedly was looking down at him. With such surprise and unbridled hope. He was doing it again.

So linked were they, that she didn't even have to say it out loud. He was already feeling the emotions of her heart. Her love was making him love. It was plainly written all over his face.

"I guess you finally did it, then," Pan murmured as she rolled off him and collapsed into the pillows.

"Did what?" She could barely_ breathe _in shock, let alone speak, but she managed it.

"You made me say your name," he whispered into her ear, pulling her in by her waist until she was locked in his embrace, her back to his chest, sharing one pillow.

"Only for ten minutes," she said, ignoring the truth in his words, referring to the hold that he'd pulled her into.

And she was true to her word. After ten minutes, whilst Pan was simply taking in the beauty of her naked form, Evie slipped from his embrace and pulled on her clothes before slipping out into the evening and walking back home with those bags of groceries.

But she was shaking the entire way. Because the way that they had just made love had shaken her, and she knew that already, Pan was driving her further into her lonely madness.


	19. Admissions

**Chapter Nineteen**

A/N: I get so annoyed when my band can't stay off the topic of boobs for like, five minutes. Like seriously guys, they need girlfriends.

Anywho, here's another chapter for you! Quite a lot of swears in this one, but meh.

I watched _On Stranger Tides_ today. Had little fangirl moments here and there. Showed my sister a picture of Colin O'Donoghue and she said he looked girly. #sheneedstosortoutherpriorities

_Nellee _and _Aureaborealis_, my darlings, you are the bombshiz.

Enjoy my lovelies! xx

* * *

**Admissions**

xxx

**_Two Weeks Ago_**

_"You know what, Felix," Pan was saying, "If you're so fucking against even training the lost boys, what fucking use do you have to me!"_

_"Whoa, Pan," Felix said with his hands up as he took a step away from his leader. "If you wanna fucking flip out, don't do it so close to me." He'd seen the flash of red that had shot from his hands in anger. It wasn't as huge as it would have been two years ago, but it was still enough to frighten Felix. He'd see the power that Pan had emitted when he'd first taken Evie's love._

_"I'll do what I want, Felix," Pan answered angrily, "You follow me. And you need to get on with this before I fucking sever your head from your body and use it as a reminder to the rest of the lost boys. I need those palace plans. How else am I suppose to invade the castle and take over?"_

_"Using your power –"_

_"MY POWER IS FUCKING WANING, FELIX!" Pan was in a rage now, his entire body edged in a shining red aura. "I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS SHIT!"_

_"Well maybe you just need a power up?"_

_"You think that just any fuck will do it, Felix?!" he exclaimed, spinning around on his heel to walk away. But as he paced, Felix could see the red glow fading from his body. His rage was fading as he genuinely thought over what his most loyal follower had said. The love he had taken from Evie wasn't enough. Why? A star's love was eternal! Unless…_

_"She's given it to someone else," Pan murmured in realisation. He spun around to face Felix is shock. "Our Princess has given her love to someone else. God, that little harlot!" He muttered under his breath in frustration. How dare she! _

_Well, to be put fairly, he had treated her rather poorly. It had been two years since he last saw her. She was probably off in some castle tending to servants and surrounded by jewels. Even though he knew that such things never concerned her, he like to think that way. It helped ease that twinge that bugged him incessantly._

_"I have to go there," Pan said finally. "She has to love me again, I need her power. Without it I cannot have eternal youth. I cannot have the kingdom I desire…"_

_"I don't think she's going to take kindly –"_

_"Shut it, Felix!" Pan ordered. "Get me my star. I'll need it to get back to the Enchanted Forest."_

_"Of course, Pan," Felix responded, with a quick incline of his head._

_Pan took a deep breath then. He didn't know what seeing her would do to him. But he knew that he couldn't let her affect him. He couldn't let her love change him again – just her power. All he needed was her power._

_He tried to convince himself that right up until the moment he faced her two weeks later. By then, those thoughts were long gone._

_He wanted to love her._

_And so he did._

xxx

Evie was once again reclusive that night. She put away her shopping in the foodstore and went to Ash's room without a second thought. She heard the sounds of games being played and joyous laughter and knew that she couldn't take it.

Which was why, when Killian came to put Ash to sleep, he found Evie sitting by the fire, her back up against the chair, completely consumed by the flickering flames.

Ash was already asleep in his arms, so when he put her down, she merely slept on, her face peaceful. Evie's on the other hand, was lost. And it was almost as though she hadn't seen him come in. When he went to go and sit next to her, he frowned, one of his empty bottles of rum sitting beside her.

"Evie…" he muttered disapprovingly. They both knew she couldn't hold her alcohol.

"It's beautiful," she murmured, still not taking her eyes from the fire. "Warm yet cold and dangerous. If I leant out and touched it…"

"You'd get burnt," Killian reminded her.

"I know," she answered distantly and Killian noticed the hastily wrapped bandages around her palms.

"Shit, Evie," he said, cradling her hand in his. "What did you…what happened? You never drink like this!"

"Well you've got your distraction," she said, turning to look at him, "I needed a distraction from my distraction." Her voice was weak, as though it were a child speaking to him. With wide eyes then, she thoughtlessly leaned over and planted her lips on Killian's.

All he could do was be shocked. He couldn't even kiss her in return. Rather, he found her waist and pushed her back, her lifeless body moving with only the barest movement.

"Did he make me so unlovable?" Evie bowed her head when Killian pushed her away and tears welled up in her eyes.

"What's going on, Evie?" Killian asked, desperation growing in his voice. He hated seeing her like this. It was as though she was fighting with herself internally. He knew for a fact she wouldn't feel anything towards him, not in that way. So why had she kissed him? _A distraction from my distraction…_

"What's your distraction, Evie?" Killian asked gently.

She chuckled, an empty laugh, "He's no distraction. He's like a fucking parasite. Taking everything I feel and making me feel more in an endless circle. I don't want him," she turned to Killian desperately then, her burnt hands grasping at his collar, "I don't want him, I swear."

"Who?"

"Pan," she said, continuing on then as though the revelation hadn't just rocked Killian to the core. His mouth opened in shock. That explained it. The mood swings, the crying…

"But he's an enigma Killian," she continued, "One minute he's cold and unfeeling and the next he's holding me and loving me and…"

"Wait…you've seen him?"

"I've been fucking him for a week," Evie said blatantly.

A moment's silence fell between them then, as Killian, overtaken by shock, took in her words. "You hate him," Killian finally murmured. How many times had he felt her unhappiness? Beginning all those years ago when she would return from Neverland, alone and missing Pan. And then it had returned in the past few days – that desperation and distance.

"Do I?" she murmured to herself, her dark eyes finding the flames once again. "How can I?"

"He left you, Evie," Killian murmured. "He left you to the horrors of this world."

"Did he?" she continued, "Didn't I do that myself? Didn't I go to him, and want him. And let him touch me and take me." If she wasn't so inebriated, she wouldn't dare to speak so openly to Killian, but he was listening, his face showing varying degrees of horror with what he was hearing.

"You were young –"

"Maybe," Evie whispered bitterly. "But I was old enough to bear a child."

"You were…" Killian's breath hitched as his eyes darted over Ash, safe and sound in her bed. Realisation flooded his face as Evie buried her face in her hands, fighting back tears as she told Killian words she'd withheld for eight months. "Ash is Pan's child."

And the sob that came from Evie's lips confirmed it. His hand slipped to her back, in an effort to comfort her, but her body wracked with the tears that flew down her face. Killian could almost not take it in; almost. And now that he knew, he wasn't sure that he wanted to. Ash – _his_ Ash – was fathered by Pan.

"And do you love him?" Killian found himself repeating the exact same words he'd asked her almost four years ago. But even more reluctant to hear her answer now.

"I don't know," she groaned desperately."I did...I might..."

Fuck, Evie, she thought to herself as her breath came sharply, just admit it. You _do_ love him. You love him.

"Yes."

And she cried herself into silence as Killian wrapped his arms around her, comforting her through the night as the fire died into embers, and the two of them fell asleep in the most awkward position possible.

But still, they were closer than they'd ever been.


	20. One Day

A/N: Ergh. I just had to drop Italian because it clashed with the times that I worked. But now I have to do French. =( (Which isn't a bad thing since most of my family speaks French and I always get cut out of conversations, but I know the amount of effort it's going to take and that sucks).

Rant Over.

HERE'S DE NEXT CHAPTER!

In the last chapter, I wrote slut first and then I thought, hmmm, that's a little harsh. So I wrote harlot instead, and if you laughed at it, that's good because I cracked up writing it. =P

_**Aureaborealis**__: You little gem! I just got all warm and fuzzy inside. (If I had emoticons, it would be that one that's about to burst into happy tears)._

_**Scorpiongirl92**__: Being Felixish is good. Very good in fact. Because Felix may have a very big role coming up..._

_**ElektraMackenzie**__: Dem awkward moments. =P_

_**Nellee:**__ I loved writing that first scene. It was just hilarious to have Pan and Felix fighting. Thank you for your in depth analysis! =P_

_**Juliptree**__: Aww thank you! I love them too! I didn't have an OTP until I met them. =P_

_Enjoy! xx_

* * *

** One Day**

xxx

**One Month Ago**

_"What was that?"_

_Evie's eyes widened in shock as she looked over at Ash in astonishment. She was sitting in Killian's lap as he threw her gently into the air and caught her time after time. But right now, she was smiling. And a moment ago…_

_"I think it was a laugh," Killian said, turning Ash around to face him. "Did you just laugh, Ash? Did you just laugh at me?" She nodded and smiled in agreement and Evie and Killian laughed in return._

_"She doesn't do it a lot," Evie mused. "Only a few times since you got her back. I've seen her take a few steps though."_

_"Really?" Killian eyebrows raised. "Can you do that, Ash? Can you walk?"_

_Ash looked up at him intelligently before turning around and climbing to her wobbly feet._

_"Did she honestly just understand what I said?" Killian asked in astonishment, looking up at Evie._

_"She's smart," she answered. "Even if she hasn't spoken yet, she knows what we're saying."_

_And they both watched as Ash took a few steps before toppling. They laughed until she started crying, and both of them took turns at soothing her, until she climbed into Evie's lap and started to tug at her top. Evie sighed loudly in disappointment, "She's getting teeth," she almost whined._

_"If I had breasts…" Killian started, almost wistfully._

_"You'd be the one feeding her," Evie snapped. "Now shoo. Go make lunch."_

_"Aye aye, Captain," Killian grinned, standing up and heading to the doorway where he closed the door and left Ash and Evie alone._

_"I love you, Ash," Evie murmured as she stroked her daughter's forehead. Content._

xxx

**Present Day**

Evie had one hell of a headache when she woke up the next morning. Killian was still asleep next to her, his mouth hanging open unattractively and there was a repetitive knock coming at the door.

Hobbling to her feet, Evie went to open it, finding Emma there with a worried look on her face.

"Hi Evie," she said, her brow furrowing, "You look horrible, are you okay?"

"I may have…drunk a little last night…" she admitted as another pain hit her head.

"Evie, you know you can't hold it," Emma answered disapprovingly. "Do you know where Killian is?"

"Erm, yeah, he's asleep," Evie answered, opening the door completely. "Mind you, he's going to have a massive neck ache."

Emma's face was worried at the concept of Killian and Evie in the same room all night, but when she saw him on the floor, she couldn't help the laugh that escaped her. Tracing lightly down his face with her hand, she woke him up to hear him murmur, "Emma."

"Nice to know you're thinking of me Jones," she answered with a smile. "But unless you want to be nursing a destroyed neck, I'd get up right now."

A little confused at first, he realised what she meant when he moved.

"Ow."

Ash let out a little cry as Evie pulled her out of the crib. Seeing Killian in pain apparently made her act out too. "Sorry, little star," he said as he got up, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm a bit sore."

"C'mon, we'd best get you something for that," Emma said, helping him to his feet.

"A massage?" He perked up at the thought.

"Maybe," Emma said with a small smile playing at her lips.

"Keep it child friendly, you two!" Evie called out before looking back down at Ash, "There are too many people about! Honestly, you'd think _I_ was their mother," she murmured to her daughter. "Can you say that? Mama?"

But Ash merely grinned at her. She knew how to say it alright. But she was too much like her father and kept it from her mother because she wanted to play with her. Not that Ash realised it herself, though. She _was_ only just over a year old.

xxx

"Wilhelm rode into town yesterday," Evie heard someone say as she walked through the markets. She had Ash in a sling on her back and she was pointing out everything, but it wasn't drawing attention. Instead it just made Evie seem like any ordinary young mother doing her shopping. Any ordinary young mother doing her shopping with ears intent on hearing any peep of what Regina was planning.

"Oh! He's back from Hintar?"

"Says he saw a troop of men, silver and black."

_The Immortals._

"How far?"

"A little over two days ride at that time. If they were heading here, only a day away…"

_One day._

"How many?"

"Over a hundred, but not enough for an invasion."

"So why would King Highmark be sending them…"

"Perhaps they are to assist King David and Queen Snow?"

"Perhaps…"

Or perhaps they were to find Ash and kill Pan. _One day._

Evie got what she needed and headed home. After spending the day occupying the girls with reading and chores, she pulled Sarah, Flora and Alessia aside.

"Girls," she began as they all leant on benches around the kitchen. "Should the need arise, you would be able to protect us, wouldn't you?"

"From the lost boys?" There was a greedy look is Alessia's eyes, as though she was eager to finally pull out her bow and arrow and get some action.

"Er, no," Evie said biting down on her lip. "We're, erm…actually going to be fighting _with_ the lost boys."

"WHAT?!" The girl's voices rang out in unified astonishment. Each face was horrified and Evie quickly went about explaining.

"What you have to understand is that we have a common motive," Evie began. "There are people out to find Ash and steal her away. And those same people want to kill Pan. So, in addition to you three, the lost boys are also going to help once I get in contact with Pan."

"You hate Pan," Sarah answered pointedly.

"Apparently." Evie rolled her eyes. She'd go with it for the moment even though her gut and heart knew differently. They didn't need to share in her confusion. "But, this isn't just for him, this is for Ash. And Ash is one of us. Now, I'm hoping it won't get this close, but I want you all prepared just in case."

"Flora," Evie said pointedly, "Knives sharpened. Alessia," she turned to the next girl, "You might need to do some fletching tonight. Sarah," Evie turned to her and said, "You might need to wear pants tomorrow."

Sarah groaned, but she was the best girl Evie had ever seen in hand to hand combat. Killian had taught her sword fighting to compliment it and now, she was a force to be reckoned with. If there was a last line of defence for Ash, Evie wanted it to be these sixteen year old girls.

Killian came out of Emma's room then to go and put Ash into her cot for her afternoon nap. She'd fallen asleep in his arms and she was getting decidedly heavier as she grew. But he spotted Sarah heading back to her room and handed her to the girl, who Evie then asked to look after her for a while because she was going out.

It was almost dark outside by the time Evie shut the door behind her and stepped onto the almost completely empty street. The stallholders had all cleared away and now it was just her.

And as though he sensed her presence, Pan stepped outside of his door, eyes widening when he spotted her.

"Evening," he said politely as Evie crossed the road to meet him.

"Pleasantries?" Evie scoffed, "Really? I came here to give you further warning."

"Oh?"

"Highmark's sent about a hundred," Evie said quickly, "They should be here tomorrow."

"And you want me to get the lost boys on it," Pan nodded and without waiting another second knocked on the door, yelling, "Felix!"

"What?!"

"Round up the lost boys! Attack's on its way!"

Evie heard a couple of choice swear words before Felix yelled back, "Fine!"

Evie almost laughed at the way they talked now. It was more friendly than she'd ever heard them speak. Maybe Pan _was_ changing.

"And how are you today, Evie?"

"I'm fine," she said, pointedly avoiding looking at him.

"No you're not," he answered knowingly, pulling her face up to look at him. "Have you warned your friends? Your man and your girls?"

"You know about Killian?" Evie's mouth dropped open. Since when?

"Since you came to me with that mark upon your neck three years ago," he answered, his eyes glancing over the smooth skin of her neck. "It's okay."

"What?" Evie's mouth dropped open in shock. "Since when are you okay with sharing?"

"Oh, I'm not," he grinned, "But I know you don't feel that way about him."

"Oh?"

"He has his own Princess," Pan said, sliding his arms around her, surprising her. "This Princess is mine."

xxx

"Killian," Emma murmured in shock as he opened the door without knocking. He walked straight in to find Emma snatching her dress up in an effort to cover her modesty. She was turned away from him, her back fully exposed whilst her hair was shading her face from view.

"Thank you for not waiting for my response when you walked into my room," Emma said sarcastically as she held up her dress. She turned around slowly, expecting him to leave. With wide eyes she saw that his were shining with a look she hadn't seen in his eyes in a very long time. Sure, working in the tavern she'd seen a lot of eyes following her like that, but she'd never given in.

God, Killian's eyes made her want to give in.

"I'm sorry, I'll just…" His arms moved to the doorway but he couldn't tear his eyes away from her.

Emma made the decision then, to drop her dress.

Killian's breath hitched audibly as she stood before him completely naked.

"Emma," he groaned, taking a step forward. "I thought you said you wanted to take it slow this time."

"Slow?" Emma said, rolling her eyes. "I was kidding. We moved past taking things slow two years ago, Jones." She was walking towards him then and he was completely at her mercy, his body no longer his own. Her hands reached to remove him of his clothing which she did so wordlessly, concentrating on what she was doing rather than the way his eyes were following her face. Whenever he reached out to touch her, she would push his hands away.

When she was running her fingers over his chest, her lips followed them, touching every inch of skin she could find, but she still wouldn't look at him.

"Emma," he groaned when her hands roamed lower, brushing over his bulge as she reached for his ties. "Let me touch you."

"Once you're naked," she answered, finally getting his pants undone and leaning down to push them off with his boots. But just as he went to reach for her, she had spun him around and pushed him down unto her bed. Leaning down until she was straddling him, she kissed him, dangerously passionate. His hands found her hips as she rolled them over the hardness beneath her. Killian groaned once more into her lips and she smirked at him, sliding down his body quickly before touching him where he wanted her, her lips following quickly.

"Erm…Emma?"

"Shh," she muttered, her green eyes clouded by lust. "Let me do this."

Killian couldn't help the sounds that escaped him as he pleasured him with her mouth. She continued even when he protested, taking him in until he came, and he was breathing heavily.

"Fuck, Emma." Killian looked down at Emma in shock as she leaned back onto her knees. "Where on earth did you learn how to do that?"

"The other maids talked," Emma answered a coy smile playing at her lips as she leaned over him. "They shared tips between each other, not realising that I didn't share their extracurricular activities. Well…until now."

Killian rolled her over then, kissing the smile off her lips as he took the time exploring her that she had with him. But she was thrusting her hips up into his fluidly, demanding without words that he take her. Even when he offered her some relief with his hand, she tried to guide him to her entrance with her hand. He finally got the message and slipped into her eagerly, completely enveloped by all that was Emma. And he moved with her, in and out of her, until desperation overtook them and they sped into their climax, falling into each other in ecstasy.

"I've missed you," Emma breathed, kissing him.

"We've got plenty of time to make up for, love," Killian murmured, his lips tracing down her neck.

"Well then," Emma smirked, rolling him back onto his back, "I'd best get you ready for another round."

xxx

Evie was standing in the middle of the street with Pan in that moment. Her feet were trembling as the cool night air swept through the vacant street. And as a shiver went through her, he merely pressed her tighter to his body. He felt her body shaking in her embrace and murmured into her hair, "We're going to be okay, Evie."

"How do you know?" she whispered, looking up at his gleaming green eyes.

"Because I have your heart," he answered honestly, holding her face on both of his hands as he finally uttered aloud with a hesitant murmur, "And you have mine."

"What?!"

"What, Evie, you didn't think I could love?" His smile was almost teasing.

"Well…" Evie looked up at him curiously, "I wasn't sure."

"Truth be told," he admitted, "I'm not quite sure I know what it is to love. I just know that I have…feelings for you…that I've never quite felt before." It was the most inarticulate thing he'd ever said but Evie simply grinned up at him and his face fell.

"Are you laughing at me?" he asked, his grip on her loosening as a hint of fear flashed across his face.

"Yes," Evie answered, her brown eyes twinkling. She raised her lips to his then, to calm him, and because he looked completely adorable when he was confused. He seemed eased slightly by her movements, but Evie could still sense the concern in his figure.

"It's okay," she murmured when she finally pulled away, "We'll learn together."

And together, they walked into the inn, and laid down side by side. There, they held each other in silence. The sun rose and morning came…

And they were still there. Asleep in each other's arms.


	21. Paperkites

**Paperkites**

Evie awoke to the sound of war cries the next morning. Dawn had barely broken, but the sounds that alerted them were nothing of nature. Pan stiffened momentarily in her arms before he broke away, reaching for the sword beside his bed and practically running out the door.

"Pan," Evie said, her face concerned as she watched him go. His face was just as concerned.

"I'll protect her."

They were here for him, but still he was worried for the daughter he hadn't even met yet.

"I love you," Evie answered, giving him one last surge of power. He nodded in understanding before running out of the door and into the melee that had become their street. Evie climbed out of bed, hastily searching for any form of weapon that she could find. Eventually, it came in the form of a disused bow and quiver of arrows, hidden in the back of Pan's wardrobe.

Evie wasn't the best archer in the land, but it had been one of the skills Snow made her learn, even if she didn't force her into studies, she forced her into archery. And the princess who once would have shot the squirrel in the tree five metres from the target, could now shoot that squirrel intentionally.

Not that she would be aiming at squirrels today.

The first thing she noticed when she exited the inn, was the blood. Because it splattered her leg as a severed limb came to rest by her foot. She would have been disgusted if she wasn't so angry. This was too close. The battle was too close.

"Evie!"

Killian was battling a man who had lost his shield and helmet and was ten times worse with a sword than the pirate. He'd dispatched of him within seconds.

"What the hell is happening here?!"

She hadn't told him.

Well, _fuck._

"They want Ash!" she called back to him as another man came running out of nowhere. She had her bow up in seconds, and the arrow wedge between the armour plates of his back and shoulder. He fell.

"These are Highmark's men?" Evie nodded as another wave hit the two of them and they battled on. Evie could see as she ran shooting that Felix had a firm hold over the lost boys, giving orders like he was born to be a military man. Perhaps he was; she'd never asked.

It seemed like hours but it could only have been one when they were standing in a field of bodies. Some were lost boys, but the rest, they were the Immortals. But Evie knew, where a hundred died and failed, a hundred more would follow.

Pan was finding his boys amongst the debris. And however much he showed his power to earn their respect, he respected them to. He gave the three that had fallen a warriors farewell. Two bloodied fingers on his heart and a swipe on each of the boy's cheeks. It seemed barbaric with those two lines of blood on their face, but Evie knew it was an ancient past time. One from hundreds of years before her time that still held meaning to Pan as he said goodbye to the boys who had fought for him.

Such was the relief at winning the battle, nobody noticed a shadow moving in the darkness. Even as Evie ran to hug Pan, breathing into his ear, "I'm so glad you're alive!"

"It would've been a little awkward if you weren't," he laughed pulling away. Evie caught sight of Killian over Pan's shoulder and ran to hug him too. He wrapped her in an embrace and breathed a sigh of relief.

"I was worried," he murmured.

"We're okay," Evie breathed in relief. "We're okay. She's okay."

Killian looked at her with a wide smile, but then something caught his eye over her head and in a split second, Killian had turned Evie in his arms. She almost didn't notice anything had happened until she felt him jolt forward in her arms.

"What's the matter, Killian?"

But she merely saw his eyes widening before he collapsed to the ground, his body unable to support himself even as he clung to her.

Evie saw the arrow protruding from his back and looked up instinctively, searching for where it had come from, only to find that Pan's dagger was buried in the now dead soldier's chest.

Killian was on his knees, the arrow buried deeply into his back, judging by the wheezing, probably having punctured his lung. Evie had this all running through her head logically as she tried to calm herself. That was okay; at least it wasn't his heart.

"Under," he wheezed, his eyes closing as his chest heaved. "…it's under Ash's crib."

"What are you on about?" Evie snapped before she tried to lift him up under his arms. "We need to get you healed up."

"Evie…"

The voice came from behind her, from Pan's lips, and he was staring at her with a deep seated sorrow in his eyes, and a kind of thankfulness towards Killian. That he would take an arrow for her…

"No!" she said, cutting Pan off as she stared back down at Killian. "This is nothing! Get up, Hook!"

He started laughing then, a painful sickly laugh. "I'm done for, Evie."

"No, you're not," she said, kneeling in front of him, lowering her voice to a whisper, "You can't be. Not like this. Not after everything."

"Just…Just tell Ash about me, okay? Tell her I was here."

"You will be there," Evie promised, before he crumpled further to the floor, his body falling over and convulsing as a fit of coughing wracked his body. The arrow twisted and he groaned, "Get it out." Evie was reluctant, but she did it quickly, tearing it from his body and trying to stem the bleeding, but he simply wheezed, "Leave it be."

"KILLIAN!"

Evie didn't even realise Emma had come out of the stronghold, but suddenly she was there, catching Killian as he swayed backwards on his knees, lowering him onto the ground gently. There were already tears in her eyes as she said adamantly, "If you die, so help me I will burn the Jolly Roger to ashes."

"Only if I'm on her too, love," he grinned despite his painful fatal wound, "A good captain always goes down with his ship."

"You aren't," she whispered, her green eyes shining with unshed tears. She ran her fingers along his pained face. "You aren't."

Evie realised it the same moment that Emma did. They looked up at each other and realised that just because they couldn't accept it, didn't mean that it wasn't true. When Killian coughed again and blood sprayed over his hand, everyone standing there, Pan, Emma, Evie and Felix, knew that Killian Jones, the infamous pirate Captain Hook, would be dead within moments.

"You did well, Evie," he murmured, glancing up at her. "You gave them a home."

"You did too," she whispered, taking a hold of his hand.

"And you, Princess," Killian muttered turning to Emma, "You already know how to make it on your own."

"No I don't," she whispered. "I know how to survive on my own. But that is by no means _living_. Don't you dare leave me, Jones."

"I'm sorry," he wheezed, "For what it's worth, I love you."

"I love you too, you stupid pirate," she breathed, before her eyes widened, and despite the blood and grime upon his lips, she pressed hers to his, hoping and believing that it would work. It had to…

But no light shone; no healing magic escaped them. Instead, Emma finally let her tears fall as Killian tried to console her with the limited amount of strength he had left in his hands.

"It's not fair," Emma breathed.

"Life rarely is, love," he answered sadly, feeling his heart slowing painfully, "It makes a cruel mockery of us all."

But before Emma could answer him, the sound of a door swinging open was heard, and they all turned their heads to the stronghold. Sarah held Ash in her arms, surveying the destruction that had occurred down the street. But whilst she did so, Ash had eyes only for one person.

"Dada!"

And Killian smiled his last smile, as he breathed with his last breath, almost inaudibly, "Ash."

Then he was still.

**_One Week Ago_**

_"Okay Ash," Killian was saying as the little girl sat in the chair across from him that swamped her tiny figure. "What colour am I painting this, blue? Or maybe something sparkly like gold or silver. Preferably, I like the last two, but that's just my inner pirate coming out."_

_Ash was just looking at the colours he had lying on the table indifferently. Finally however, she cocked her head at the gold one. For a moment, Killian was shocked by the movement, it was like a mirror image of him, but then he realised she was looking directly at the gold one, fixated by the shine._

_"Okay, little star," Killian said, picking up the gold paint. "Golden galaxies it is."_

_And picking up the almost finished paper kite, he set to work with his paintbrush in hand, ever thankful that he still had full use of it, and began to paint the delicate patterns of stars that he had memorised over the years._

_When Ash began to drift into sleep, he settled her down in her crib, making sure she was deep in her dreams before taking a quick walk down the hall to check on Evie. After being out for at least 24 hours, she had to be exhausted. But looking at her, he simply smiled to himself, leaning against the doorway. It crossed his mind then, that he'd never seen her as at ease as when she was asleep and dreaming._

_"I promise you, Evie," he swore then, whispering to her sleeping form as he stood in the doorway glancing back, "I promise you that I will die before I let anything happen to you."_

_He closed the door and walked down the empty hallway, waiting eagerly for the look on her face when he gave her the present of her starry paperkite. It was a gift for both her and Ash, but if possible, that would only make her love it more._

_And checking that Ash was fast asleep, he placed a kiss on her forehead, sending her his love before he turned towards his bed and laid down._

_He blew out the candle and went to sleep._


	22. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

There was a small army of people standing on the docks that day. Lost boys, lost girls, united in one common cause. Farewell.

Killian had always said that the Jolly Roger was enchanted, but Evie never really understood until now, exactly why that was. But when they'd placed his body alongside the deceased lost ones, the ship's sails had unfurled on their own, and the minute they'd cast the ship off from the dock, she had sailed her captain out to sea.

"Pan," Evie murmured quietly, refusing to let tears fall from her eyes. And with one hand in hers, he let the other glow a brilliant red before the ship erupted into flames, burning away the remnants of the amazing man who once sailed these seas.

And gradually the lost girls went home, and the lost boys went back to their inn. But there were kind waves, perhaps even some kind words. Maybe after all this, they were on the same side after all.

When it was just Pan, Felix, Emma with Ash, and Evie, that was when Evie finally broke the silence.

"Highmark and the Evil Queen will pay for this."

Pan looked at the anger in her eyes pitifully. Revenge. She wanted revenge.

"Evie…"

"You want a kingdom don't you, Pan," She turned to him fully. "You want this kingdom don't you…"

"I did…" Not after these events. Not when there was so much grief woven through their people.

"Take mine."

"What?!" His eyes widened in shock. He'd never even considered…

"After my parents died, Regina took over my kingdom. She doesn't use it, save for taxing the people more than they can afford. It's guarded, but with magic, you should be able to do it. Provided you can get it back, it's yours."

"You would give it to me?" Pan's eyes were widening. She would give him a kingdom.

"Yes." Evie said without thought. If it would protect this place… If she could control Highmark…and surely, surely Pan wasn't as bad as he seemed. Maybe she could stop warring with herself. Maybe she could give herself over to loving him as he could her.

And Evie glanced at Emma, her figure hunched over and lost in grief as she clutched Ash to her.

"Emma," Evie murmured, trying to break her from her trance, "Emma, will you help us?"

"Why?" Emma said distantly, Ash looked up at Emma curiously, unable to figure out why everyone was crying. "My kingdom's no longer in danger from him," she eyed Pan disinterestedly.

"But this isn't about him, sister," Evie said softly, "This is about me."

Emma looked up at Evie then, her eyes shining. In that moment, she looked seven years old again. Like the girl who would run through the halls of Evie's palace in the summer holidays – the girl who would pick the Night Orchids from their stalks.

Well, at least that what she would have looked like if her eyes weren't so filled with grief that she could barely compose sentences.

"You want it back," Emma whispered. "You want your home back."

"I do," Evie said with concern, "But…if you wanted to go back…to David and Snow…"

Emma was staring longingly out to sea; her green eyes reflecting the blue. And in those depths there were many things she wished she could forget, but things she knew – someone she knew – she didn't want to forget.

"They aren't my home," she breathed, tears escaping her eyes. She turned to Pan and Evie as Emma held Ash close to her. They were standing there, waiting for her to make her final decision. Her shoulders back and her head tall, Emma faced them firmly with a strength that she could fake until she learnt it once again.

"Okay then," Emma said, stepping away from the shoreline. She had to get out of there before she broke down once again. "Let's go take back the Citadel of Stars."

And as the four of them resolved their journey, Pan held tightly to the note in his hand. It was a note that had been posted under his door the morning after he knew he felt something for Evie, so close, it had rocked him to the core. Written in the neat cursive of a dead man, the words were imprinted behind his eyes.

_Be a better man for her, Pan. She deserves it._

* * *

The story continues in:

**_Paperchains_**

26.2.14


	23. Paperchains is upppppppppp!

-.-

I couldn't stay away.

So, screw 26.02.14, have 24.02.14.

And enjoy. =D

Paperchains is now up!

Love you! xx


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